The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2
by MidnightSakuraBlossom and SYD
Summary: The second half of 'The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip! The Sand Sibs are still on a road trip trying to survive in the modern world. When you throw in really quirky OCs, a fail kunoichi stalking them, constantly loosing the RV, Gaara's inner self causing trouble, Common sense being thrown out the door, Naruto being Naruto, and plenty of hijinks and pop culture references... DISC.
1. The Trip Continues! Duh! Part 1

**WHAT'S UP, PEOPLE...? No, seriously, what's up?**

**Here is the first chapter of "The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2". I hope that those of you who like the first half are willing to return to the crack and read the second half of the story. Like that of certain movies, this was way too long and had to split.**

**All you need to know is that this is not a sequel, but a continuation of sorts. If that makes sense. It takes place after the rave, but what happened will be brought up from time to time so that none of you will be left in the dark and left with "-_-" expressions, quite literally.**

**Brace yourselves for the impact of more OOC moments, crazy OCs, crack-ish moments, and plenty of references and a crap ton of inside jokes you may not get at first glance. ;D And please remember that MidnightSakuraBlossom is NOT responsible for the loss of your precious sanity, okay~?**

**Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine, and blah blah blah...**

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2**

**Chapter 01: The Trip Continues! Duh! Part 1**

**.**

YUMI'S POV

The events that happened here at North City were down-right awesome and I just can't believe all the fun and, well, chaos that has gone down in such a short time!

Oh, excuse me, I forgot to introduce myself. Sorry, sorry, but I was just in such a rush to get to the second half of our story that I failed to comply with traditional narrative devices! My name is Yumi Haruna, you probably already know about me and my family. If not, I'll tell you anyway so no one will be confused.

Me and my parents were Sand nin, but we couldn't live up to those standards and never did feel like we belonged in that violent and unfair shinobi world. Not to mention the three of us are very annoying and quirky, people around us never failed to reveal their irritation when he socialized with them. So we ran away after a technically failed mission, giving up that part of our lives and escaping to the modern world that actually exists and I will not explain that theory right now. So now, we try to live as ordinary people and forget all about our previous lives.

We fit into the story because we met Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari by a chance encounter at a gas station (when we still had our wonderful RV, sighs). And all of us just bonded after the siblings gave us a chance that no one else had bothered to do and that, that really moved me. I feel like a big sap saying this, but it's the truth.

I like the three of them, they're cool, for lack of any other spectacular wording. Temari's just about a role model for me – though I won't admit it, haha – and she's just awesome. Gaara is such a great guy underneath that constant "I don't give a fuck" look on his face all the time, I can honestly say that I really like him and I may even love him. Kankuro is...uhm...mixed feelings. I think he's such an annoying guy half the time, so perverted and it was all his fault that his revenge-obsessed puppet tried to kill us all! But the other half of the time, I find him kind of amusing and I secretly want to get to know him better. Fact of the matter is, he's too annoying for me to make up my mind!

You may wonder...why is she narrating anyway? Wasn't it mentioned in the first half of this story that she sucked at narrating and probably would never get to? Well, that is true. As you can see, I fail at it and I probably never will do this again.

So now, a recap: We all went to North City together, we're traveling because we kind of...well...me and my parents' RV was stolen by mean people. A lot of weird things happened on the journey, but at least we didn't stop...believin'~! There were strangers...up and down the boulevard~! And-

Cough, sorry about that. I have been listening to too much of Naruto's music on his MP3 playlist. (Naruto is this guy me and Gaara's age from the Hidden Leaf. From Temari's description, they both are pretty good friends. And he's traveling with us because he didn't want to go through with a dull mission and wanted to shadow us all the way here 'cause he was curious about the modern world. He had no cash and can't get transportation himself.)

And Gaara's inner self, he's very epic in his own words. He was awakened eventually and began to annoy Gaara frequently by providing stupid suggestions, reading his mind, and commenting about how sexy his sister is and that he would love to be her boyfriend. Or something. Him and Naruto went to this woman named Madame Star and her partner, Denise (a big otaku that Temari befriended back in East Ville) performed a freaking crazy killing process or something. Which really sounds like some kind of branch of black magic if you think about it long and hard. Anyway, it backfired and SEPARATED him from his mind into that of a humanoid form. I'm trying to befriend him now, but it's very difficult considering how he's constantly thinking about Temari and he tries so hard not to open up to anyone even more than he has to. Apparently, his true form is some kind of odd green light – I don't know much about that because he is still too humiliated by that to explain to all of us confused folks what that was symbolizing. I hate not knowing anything.

This happened, that happened, I disappeared for a while to practice my ninja skills to see if I am still capable to handle myself (especially after I was harassed by a guy I later found out was one of Madam Star's "boys"), did some jobs with the group to try and get some money, encountered a weird girl named Iris who wants me and my parents to feel the same pain as her entire ninja clan after we brutally set them all aflame, met up with and befriended two rich modern-world Japanese siblings named Hiroshi and Hisako and we even met their father whom took a liking to Naruto and had it out on the local golf course with him, Gaara and Inner G and some other people got trapped in the hotel's horrible excuse of an elevator, battled Kankuro's revenge-obsessed puppet for the final time, Madame Star was rightfully driven to suicide, and we all attended the city's annual belated rave. Wow, that's a mouthful.

Now let's go to the current times: the night of the rave passed way too quickly for my liking. All of us sharing one hotel room returned early in the morning hours either drunk, high on crack (I didn't get any, but Naruto, Inner G, and some random timid girl with big breasts did), or exhausted from all the pure excitement and thrill. It was a pretty great experience for all of us. And we slept until noon.

After awakening and eating a lunch, we all gathered to discuss or plans on where to go next. We couldn't stay at North Garden anymore because the money the Sato siblings gave us was just about used up and there were no cheaper hotels here. Besides, the festival was now over and things would go back to normal in North City...not as chaotic and fun anymore.

So, we decided to check out and head elsewhere together. But first, we had to go down and speak with the pretty black-haired woman whom Naruto still detests. She didn't look so pretty as usual; she was at the desk wiping sweat from her bangs with a tissue and was wearing light make-up, a long-sleeved white shirt, and ripped light blue jean shorts. Strangely, she was holding a shovel and would not stop trembling for some reason. Mom kept wondering if she was okay, I told her to not prompt her with that question though.

We checked out, and blah blah. After this, I spoke up and asked the siblings where we'd be heading next. Because...after all of the excitement that has happened at East Ville, on the road, and here in North City, I really wanted to keep the fun going! Seeing as though the time passes differently in the ninja world and the modern world, they have only been gone for about two days. If I added that up right, I don't know. But Gaara mentioned to be that I was right for this ONE TIME. I smiled at that.

We all left the hotel and didn't bother to go to the hospital to visit Hiroshi. Because his dad, whatever his name is, contacted Naruto via his cellphone from the hospital waiting room and informed him to inform us that the doctor told him Hiroshi would survive; they managed to remove all of the poison from his cells. Hisako was so over-joyed that she had leaped into Kankuro's arms and he gave her a big damn kiss like something out of all that shojo manga I like to read. Inner G had made a funny comment about that which had me laughing on the floor for TEN MINUTES STRAIGHT. No lie.

We decided that we should leave this city as soon as possible...because we were all paranoid that people may realize that the rave wouldn't have been belated and we could have saved everyone including that epic announcer dude (sigh, I never got his name and I regret that) some terror, had Kankuro not brought along his puppets on the road trip! That guy just makes me so frustrated!

So, anyway, now we're getting to the part where all of us left the hotel and were preparing to head to the parking lot of the city...which still makes my father wonder aloud why they can't just let cars pass through the city...but that is not relevant at all...

**.**

Enough introductions! Let's move on to what happened after all of us checked out of the hotel and went into the parking lot outside of the city...

We all arrived to see a young girl, probably sixteen years old, walk out from around OUR RV. She had short blue hair that I am sure was not natural (unlike that psycho, Iris, I am sure this girl was normal and dyed her locks blue. Which, I must admit, looked awesome on her!), dark eyes, and very pale skin. She wore silver glasses on her face, and was wearing some kind of slutty black costume that I hoped she hadn't worn willingly. She was covered in oil and carried a toolbox with her.

No one else really seemed to know who this girl was. But Temari finally did, her teal eyes widened and she rushed forward to the girl.

"Denise!" Oh...okay, her name is Denise. Very well then! ...I hate that name. "What are you doing with those tools and our RV...don't tell me that Madame Star's suicide was affecting you so much that you decided to make your life suck!"

"I still kind of want to know why Madame Star would lie to be like that..." Naruto mentioned very wistfully for a moment. Me and Gaara looked over at him with some sympathy going on, because we both knew that he really had taken a liken to the mysterious woman for some strange reason that we will never once begin to understand.

Denise merely shook her head, some of the oil that had been on her pale cheeks fell off, thankfully. The first thing I noticed about her was that she seemed to be kind of cute (no, I didn't mean that with any lesbian implications). ...But I still HATE the name DENISE. That's very close to DENNIS.

"So why are you here?" Temari didn't give Denise a chance to respond, she instead whirled around to face me, my parents, Naruto, Gaara, Kankuro, and Inner G. "Everyone, this is Denise. I told you about her, right?"

"Yeah, and I know her." Gaara spoke up. "She loves anime, playing cards during dramatic moments, and she was that Madame Star's so-called assistant."

"Madame Star was the mastermind behind an evil plot that I, myself, had become intersected in. She had very mystical powers and would never tell me the TRUTH about how she got them. Now that she fell to her death after being cornered, I didn't know what the hell to do with my life and...and...and..." I clung to Gaara's arm out of pure habit when I noticed that Denise looked as if she was close to tears. I'm like Naruto, I cannot handle crying girls or guys! They turn me into a basket case! "I NEVER GOT MY _PARAMORE _ALBUMS BACK!"

Apparently, Denise can be a big crybaby. And a hardcore _Paramore _fan. The tears broke from her green eyes and she dropped her tools and ran into Temari's chest, sobbing into it.

All of us just stared. But what would you expect us to do? This whole scene was certainly getting a whiff of yuri, because Denise was in no hurry to remove her face from Temari's chest and Temari...WAS SHE BLUSHING FAINTLY? Ew...now I know why Kankuro was smiling like a retard and taking pictures of that with Gaara's cellphone of all things. I just don't like yuri, or yaoi, they both kind of creep me out a lot. Sorry fans, but that's just the way Yumi roles.

"Why doesn't she just download the music on a phone?" Gaara asked me, leaning a little closer and his face revealing a bit confusion. I restrained a smile, it was kind of a cute RARE expression.

And then Inner G burst in, literally in between us and killed the moment as usual. "I'm more concerned about WHY Temari would let her sob into her gorgeous breasts!"

"Ugh, just shut up."

"I won't. Ever. Man, you got to see them in full view that one time at East Ville and I haven't seen anything yet! I feel like my eyes haven't even lost their virginity yet!"

I sighed as Gaara and Inner G began to argue in a strange way like they usually did when the latter burst in with the former's real thoughts at the freaking worst times. Gaara seemed to be very reserved and countered Inner G's vulgar comments easily. I think it is safe to say that he got OWNED.

**.**

Finally, Denise regained her composure and Temari gave her a random tissue to wipe away her pathetic tears. And then all of us sighed and prepared for there to be a very long explanation about what the anime fangirl was going to do with her life now that she was out of this "Madame Star's" clutches.

And that, in fact, happened! Ugh!

"Everyone, I want you to know..." Denise smiled brightly, I had to admit to Gaara that she did have a cute smile. Reminds of that _Nine Days _song I once heard. ...Not that I LIKE _Nine Days _or anything, but they have some catchy tunes and awesome lyrics. "I never meant to join up with Madame Star...but I hadn't any money and she promised that...she also took every single _Paramore _album that I owned!"

"So that's...that's why you joined up with Madame Star?" Naruto asked a bit hesitantly as he walked over and placed a hand on Denise's shoulder. One of my eyebrows arched as they met eyes.

"Right to the point, Naruto." Suddenly a bit happy, Denise gave Naruto's shoulder a quick affectionate pat. "You know, this whole experience makes me want to change my life around. I want to be able to follow my original dreams and maybe make a difference in this modern world of which we're in right now!"

Everyone EXCEPT for Naruto and Temari looked at Denise with interest. It wasn't that the rest of us didn't care...it was just that this whole encounter with Denise was really wasting our time. We knew that we had to get out of here before people find out that it was Kankuro's fault the city was attacked by the blood-thirsty puppet and my dad's new-found fanboys from the previous dance-off at the rave find him again!

"I never joined forces with Madame Star willingly...and the truth is," A crooked, stupid smile once again appeared on the slutty-dressed, and yet seemingly pure girl's lips. "Ever since I could remember, I have wanted to make an anime! Anime's my drug that keeps me alive (besides _Paramore_), and I want to become famous with a great and original plot and art style!"

There was a short silence. We all kind of stared at each other for an increasing period of time before Denise clasped her hands together like a child whom was spouting off her Christmas list and continued to babble like an addict. An anime addict. Which I could...kind of relate to actually.

"Thanks to my surprising talent for art, I can draw my own manga and possibly even publish it for all to see in this modernized world! I know what kind of artwork and tone for the series, but I can't think of a plot to save my life...and I think that if I could ride along the nation with some diverse personalities...it may help me create a great plot and characters!" Denise paused to breath, as she was starting to turn purple from lack of breathing due to her intense babble. Damn, some people talk too much. Oh God, I said damn. I wonder what Mom and Dad would think...? "Um...I want to be able to travel with all of you. Just temporarily! Pretty please with dango on top!"

There was a beat. All of us glanced at each other during this awkward moment of utter silence. Dad told me afterward that he could have sworn he had gone deaf again due to the intensity of this quietness, but I held back a giggle and insisted his hearing aid was turned on and that if he could hear me at the moment – this was the truth.

I almost thought no one would respond. But one brave person broke the silence and decided to talk. Actually accept the sudden offer for ANOTHER annoying guy or girl to have to put up with on the road. And this person was...

None other than my own MOM.

"Denise, I think this would be a wonderful idea!" I turned to look at my mom, my mouth was more than likely hanging agape. But at least Dad, Kankuro, and Gaara turned to stare at her with 'what the hell?' expressions going on. "Do you like the _Dragon Ball _series?"

"I love that series!"

"EEEEE! WELCOME TO OUR CIRCLE OF FRIENDS, HONEY!"

I was too busy babbling gibberish and flailing my arms all over the place to really make a civilized protest to that statement. For one thing: I really did object because we hardly knew this girl at all, I hate the overall name 'Denise', and just because she wants to change her life around...has a cute, idiotic smile...is pals with Temari and Naruto...and likes the _Dragon Ball _series (personally, I preferred _Dragon Ball Kai _and everything else bored me to tears), this doesn't mean that we should allow her to travel with us on such a short notice without any true thought put into it!

Oh my God, I will never be able to tell Mom this to her face...but it seems like SOMEONE had gotten a little too high on crack last night at the epic rave. There's probably a little corner in hell saved just for me right now...sigh...

"Mrs. Haruna, you can't exactly make spontaneous decisions like that..." Gaara deadpanned, sighing and looking at the time with his phone because it was obvious that he hated how long this was taking. He was also muttering something irrelevant; about 'Matsuri' and 'unnecessary texts'. Did someone named Matsuri text 'em? Weird...

Matsuri actually seems like a cute name. Denise sounds kinda American. I think Italian names are pretty cute though, at least, the author's name makes me naturally smile as to hear it – CRAP! SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN TO ME NOW, I JUST BROKE THE FORTH WALL! THAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE GAARA'S BAD HABIT!

**.**

**SOMEWHERE IN THE HIDDEN SAND**

MATSURI'S POV

Oh, wow, I'm actually getting to narrate my own insertion in this chapter! Hallelujah! Wait...wait a minute, I can't speak Hebrew and I'm not even Jewish...oh well~!

My name is Matsuri, my last name is too long so I can't tell you what it is. But let me just say that I am your simple sixteen year old kunoichi from the Hidden Sand Village. My hair is short, brown, and generally stripped of volume because I can't afford good conditioner. My eyes are brown and my skin is very pale. Gaara used to be my sensei, he taught me a lot about fighting and actually gave me a bit of confidence in myself...it's too bad that he hardly sends me off on complicated missions to let me prove myself. I also hang out with a lot of other people occasionally and I have a massive crush on Gaara but...he tends to never notice me.

That's why I have decided to take the liberty of watching out for him and his elder siblings' mansion while they are away on a road trip to that 'modern world' place. I hope that this will prove to him how dependable I truly am, and maybe he could see me in a different light.

BUT NOW I'M NOT SO POSITIVE. IN FACT, I KIND OF WANT TO FALL OVER DEAD! Baki (he's this cool jounin that used to be Gaara's teacher, me and him get along surprisingly well), and just about ever other person in this village all got into some alcohol or drugs or something and threw a wild house party in the mansion! I had to try and make peace, but it took me days to do it! Now, now things are semi in control...I all but THREATENED Baki, Sari (she's one of my friends, her crush on Gaara is very out there.) and Suki (she's a fourteen year old girl who crossdresses as a boy frequently because always believed she should have been born male. She gropes her sister's swaying butt frequently...ugh...) to help me clean out the place so that it will be ready for their homecoming.

We haven't finished yet...but we are working on it as I speak! In fact, Sari says that she doesn't mind helping if it's for Gaara, Suki just likes to hang around me and Sari (she's a really confused bisexual, never knows if she likes men or women. Double time ugh.). Baki is just worried that Kankuro will yell at him again like he typically does when he's all ticked off or hates any ideas that he comes up with.

So anyway, I'm standing in Temari's bedroom with Baki, we are trying to replace the wallpaper after some woman that he had been dancing with while singing _Bob Seger _songs had messed them up by drowning it in mountain dew. Seriously...who likes mountain dew? It's loaded with sugar and makes me want to puke...

"Come on, Gaara, please answer my text..." I whispered longingly as I stared at my phone like a hawk. Eagerly awaiting Gaara to text me back. We already gathered and thrown away all of the beer cans that were scattered along Temari's bed and wiped up the cum some twenty year old guy who was masturbating left behind, and are still trying to replace the wallpaper.

Baki paused in the middle of pulling out the new wallpaper, he walked over to me with a confused face. "Matsuri? Why do you sound so lusty?"

"Ohhhh...I'm just lonely I guess." I managed to sigh, my brown eyes closed and I sat down on some cushions Temari had piled up in the corner of the room. "Haven't spoken to Lord Gaara in a while and it's really getting to me..."

"Try masturbating." And with that said, Baki returned to putting up the wallpaper like nothing happened as if he never even bothered to talk to this useless filler character.

But my entire face went bright red after that, and I proceeded to shakily yell at Baki for suggesting something like that. Because...because...IonlydothatonSaturdays...cough, choke...cough...

**.**

**AND BACK INSIDE OF NORTH CITY'S PARKING LOT**

YUMI'S POV

Okay...wow...I'm exhausted. I can't really explain gradually what exactly happened during that horribly done timeskip between events. So why don't we just go on and come right out with a no-nonsense explanation of what happened and how we caved in and allowed this ambitious anime fangirl friend of Naruto and Temari's to join up with us (TEMPORARILY; THANK GOD! I CAN'T STAND HER OR HER NAME...NEITHER CAN INNER G OR KANKURO -SURPSINGLY!).

So while Denise stood there and looked on with a totally pathetic hopeful expression, Kankuro announced that all of us should huddle together a few feet away so that we could consider the offer at our hands and weigh the pros and cons. I smiled at this, for once agreeing with the very irritating puppet master who I don't believe will ever be able to truly accept me in his little brother's life. Even if Temari objected, Inner G insisted that we should do this. And no one can tell that weird and very epic inner differently so she broke down and came to a reluctant agreement.

It took several minutes to reach a compromise with the topic which Dad decided to label: "That Damn Obstacle That Prevents Us From Enjoying Our Trip". Despite how serious and stoic he looked when he said that, Mom just giggled and interlocked their fingers as they held hands, mentioning that he summed this encounter with the ambitious and no-so-popular mangaka. Some of us grudgingly agreed, but others protested and until we lost our voices rather than our hearing – sorry for the reference, Dad.

Temari agreed that we should allow her to come with us. Her argument to back up her case was due to the fact that she found Denise to be fun and interesting, she felt as though they could be good friends. They were into the same anime and they talked about all kinds of favorite topics back at the beach resort and in the hot tubs there. And since it was revealed that she didn't really help Madame Star willingly, and even decided to show us how sorry she was by fixing up her and her siblings' RV while we were raving, she thought it was a good idea. But I think she just wanted another girl to talk to, she's obviously sick of only having me and Mom!

Naruto was on the same page as Temari. He believed that Denise really wasn't evil and that she was telling the truth, and the fact that she was going to become a manga artist was severely awesome and he wanted the main character to be based off of his awesomeness (Gaara had managed to being him back to earth after reminding him that too many people had already made main characters of stories based off of him and named objects and towns after him. I rose a brow at that, had me and my parents really been out of the ninja world that long to have not known that?). Besides, he thought of Denise as a friend and liked to play cards with her in dramatic moments. Not to mention, she claims her favorite color is orange.

Me and Dad objected to this, all we could say for ourselves was that we hardly knew Denise and for all we knew...she could be secretly against us. And we didn't need anymore people like that fail Mist kunoichi, Iris, to be following us around all the time trying to kill us.

Mom sorta objected. But she, like Inner G, agreed grudgingly after Naruto reminded them that Denise went through all of the trouble of TRYING to get the Sand Sib's RV back in shape even though she sucked at mechanics. I've the idea that Inner G agreed only because Temari backed it up. He's too smitten with her, but I find it kind of cute especially after he told me about what his attraction for her may have come from.

Gaara and Kankuro both disagreed with the decision. And they said absolutely nothing to back that up. But with the way they both kept giving the girl annoyed expressions, it was apparent that neither liked her. At least some people are still smart. After all, it would be ridiculous if everyone in the world liked one certain person and worshiped the ground that she walked on! There is a term for this...but I can't freaking remember what it's supposed to be!

Now, logically, it would make sense for Denise to not join us. Like most of us wanted. But unfortunately, that didn't work out as well as we all were praying for! Have you ever seen Temari and Naruto before? They were both so stubborn that they insisted we let Denise tag along! Ugh! I feel real annoyed with them right now, and I heard Inner G lean over in Gaara's ear and tell him not-so-quietly that he would never get used to this anime and _Paramore _fangirl. At least someone did something right.

"I promise all of you, I won't join for too long." Denise explained, as if sensing the tension. But anyone could have sensed the tension; it was so horrible that it was VISIBLE and Gaara and Temari commented upon it's existence. So it wasn't just Denise that noticed it, I refuse to believe that she's perfect! NOBODY is perfect after all! "As soon as I get inspiration for my manga or find another place that I want to live...then I will get out of your hair!"

"But about your family?" Gaara pointed out.

"Wouldn't they find it freaky that a group of epic freaks whisked away their daughter on a road trip?" Inner G pointed out too. Judging by the look in Gaara's eyes, he must have thought that secretly and Inner G outwardly stated that inward thought because he...is...well, that is his job as an inner.

R-RIGHT? The whole concept of inners really baffles me...but it also causes much consideration about if all of us really do have them and if I have a totally opposite inner as well! That would be cool!

Denise just bit her lip in a guilty manner and turned her face away from us. "Yeah...I sort of lied to you about having a family coming along with me. Actually, my family is very small and they live in a place in the west that I keep forgetting the name of because of a horrible case of long-term memory loss."

"You have long-term memory loss?" Gaara asked in confusion.

Denise merely shrugged her shoulders. I flinched involuntary at that because of her slutty shirt, it was so low that it looked as if it would fall off. And I, for one, am not interested in female fanservice! "It kinda runs in the family. Which is why I told Temari wrong information when she encountered me and my late 'master', Madame Star. I really didn't come here on a road trip with my family, I ran away because I didn't want them to ship me off to a boarding school, they really couldn't care less about me. And I forgot that I do have a dream: which is to become a famous mangaka!"

All of us sweatdropped. And, from here on out, our story became even more weird and insane. But the odd thing is that we haven't even left North City yet! What kind of mayhem would be in store for all of us later?

**To Be Continued**

**.**

**Yes, it was a rather dull beginning. But I can assure you that it will be getting even more crazy from here on out! The reason I made Yumi the narrator was just a little fun thing thrown because everyone deserves to get a day in the limelight once in a while. Some characters will get that treatment from time to time.**

**This second half will be rated M due to the various crude comments, language (lots of f-bombs and loaded with cursing), blatant suggestive themes and a lot of attempted sexual jokes later on. As the first half of the story progressed, I rated it T. But due to all of the themes that began to enter, it probably reached borderline M most of the time. Well, this is the reason for the strong rating. I wanted that to be clear.**

**The story is far from over. But please excuse any LONG update waits. I really don't know when they will happen, but they will come as soon as I can manage. Don't feel deserted if it takes even MONTHS to get the following chapter. Life can be a bitch. TT_TT**

**Read and review, you'll get some of SYD's leftover cupcakes from the last chapters we collaborated on in the first half of the story! *Dangles the aforementioned desserts teasingly***

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**


	2. The Trip Continues! Duh! Part 2

**Disclaimer: MidnightSakuraBlossom doesn't own Naruto or the Sand Siblings, she probably never will. But that's just fine, she would probably make it suck.**

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2**

**Chapter 43: The Trip Continues! Duh! Part 2**

**.**

NO POV (REGULAR THIRD PERSON)

Now that Denise was going to be with them on the road trip, rules were going to be established on the road so that there would be no tension, no awkwardness, and hopefully...no falling in love. The first person to state all of this was Temari, whom took the liberty of making herself in charge most of the time since back in the very first chapter in the first half of this story.

And yes, the fourth wall was just broken. Nothing bad will occur do to the fact that nobody had said this themselves, and it was just a ambiguous narrative device.

Temari cleared her throat and eyed her brothers, her and her brothers' friends and Mountain Dew-aholic of an inner self, and the aspiring mangaka. Everyone just shrugged boredly. Is boredly even a word? Oh well, it's being used regardless and arguments are invalid (although very necessary in another POV because the word "boredly" is just plain ridiculous).

"On the road, I suggest that we make some rules. There's some kind of crazy force apparently among us that is causing chaos...so I suggest we don't take risks (for now)." Temari noticed that everyone immediately sighed all at the same time, but didn't say a word. So, she continued. "First things first: only me or Mr. Haruna will be driving the RV."

"WHAT?"

Mrs. Haruna promptly cringed from the overwhelming volume of her husbands voice, she apologized to everyone quickly before leaning over and turning on his hearing aid. Temari merely repeated the question since the ex-Sand shinobi hadn't heard it the first time (being deaf and forgetting to fix your own hearing aid is a huge bummer).

"Why can't I drive?" Denise spoke up, smiling politely and hoping that Temari would think that it's cute so she could drive their RV. It was only fair, considering she tried to fix it even though she sucked at mechanics and did that because she wanted to thank everyone for improving her life.

"Have you any driving experience?"

"Sort of...I once had this daydream were I was a super fast and successful NASCAR driver-"

"Yes, ONLY me and Mr. Haruna!" Denise's smile faded and her shoulders slumped.

"Damn!"

"Rule number two: were going to need money if we're going to stay on this trip...it's been almost a month, but that's okay because of the strange time differences between the worlds. We've almost completely run out of our money and what Hiroshi and Hisako gave us. We're totally broke. We'll have to work out asses off for money."

"Yen isn't even useable here..." Kankuro interjected with a disappointed sigh, gazing wistfully at the aforementioned crap ton amount of Japanese currency in his hand.

"What about Euro?" Inner G asked excitedly, pulling out and flashing a huge amount of Euro coins and dollars at everyone. Okay, how the fuck did he have Euro in the first place? Is he just that epic to defy these things?

"WE'RE NOT EVEN IN EUROPE! HOW THE HELL DO YOU HAVE ALL THAT?" Well said, Kankuro. Well said.

"Personally, if we're going to Europe during this trip in some kind of American-fied modern world, I would like to visit the Netherlands." Yumi mentioned with a stupid grin. But no one cared about what she had to say, so they all ignored her. Apparently; she will never get to visit the Netherlands like she wants to. For some bizarre reason.

"There will be no playing truth or dare unless absolutely necessary. That last game that we played left such a mental scar forever." Mrs. Haruna, Kankuro, and Gaara visibly trembled together at just the mentioning of that game. They remembered what undeniable chaos went down the last time they played.

It was just insane. All that can be said for now until mentioned later is: Kankuro had to kiss Mrs. Haruna, Temari had to make a hamburger and then eat it (the bad thing about that was the fact it was so greasy and she didn't want to lose her sexy figure), Gaara had to act out a bondage scene with Yumi, and by the end of the game...all of the players were traumatized so badly.

The only person to object the truth or dare rule was Mr. Haruna. Only due to the fact he never got to participate and, in a case of sudden hindsight, he wants to. Denise just gave him a scolding look because she hated truth or dare; as she once was dared to make out with a boy that was very attractive...only to find out the next day that he was really a girl in disguise and that SHE wasn't even into girls and probably only returned the kiss because she had been at the typical teenage get-together as well and gave into per pressure. The reason for concealing her gender had never been revealed...but it probably doesn't even matter now.

"And, most importantly," Temari bravely walked over to Inner G with so much control, composure, and dignity. Yumi was awe-struck by this fact for a long amount of time. "Inner...whatever you prefer to be called: I have been thinking about this for a long amount of time. And, well, after the rave when we uh...ah...you know..."

How could Inner G possibly forget what she was referring to? He stared for a few seconds, silent and shifting his feet in embarrassment as he recalled what happened at the rave. After that drinking contest when Hisako won and rightfully decided to give the keys and ownership back to the Sand kunoichi (read: after she greedily took off running around the large building to take off with the RV, and it literally took Temari, Kankuro, Inner G, that random timid girl with big breasts, Naruto, and the epic announcer dude to corner and make her give it up).

**.**

**FLASHBACK TIME~**

_Temari stood in her sexy black outfit watching her impromptu drinking contest come to it's conclusion. The nerdy guy that she placed in control of it was looking back at her with poorly disguised happiness that a girl like her WILLINGLY chose him to be the judge. 'Cause it was almost like...indirectly giving him attention._

_Most people that saw him walking around the city's parking lot would just lean out their window and randomly shout "NERD!" very loudly and for several seconds anyway. And this kind of annoyed him, really._

_The random people that had gotten into the contest were either passed out or slowing down from the intense alcohol consumption. Kankuro was almost at his limits, but not yet drunk. And Hisako was exhausted but pushing on with motivation to WIN that goddamn RV for her and her family so they could have some fun before going off to boring ol' college and be a part of the system!_

_It was quite intense. Inner G sighed and sulked back to the Sand kunoichi after having lost a game of rock paper scissors with the dude in charge of the techno music that was being played._

"_I didn't convince 'em to play the RIGHT kind of music." Inner G muttered darkly once meeting Temari's annoyed face. She kind of really didn't care about him at the moment, because all attention had to be kept on her contest. "The jackass insisted that raves always play techno music, not 'inappropriate and satanic metal'."_

"_What did you want him to play?"_

"_..._Iron Maiden_."_

_Temari thought for a moment...gradually realizing the name. Her body went limp as she stood and her eyes widened. "Seriously? HE WOULDN'T ALLOW THAT?"_

"_Huh...?"_

"_I LOVE THEM! SO FUCKING MUCH!" Temari rushed forward and all but crushed Inner G's shoulders with her desperate grasp on them. But he didn't care, just the fact alone she was so close was enough to make his senses slip and his mind to go to the Promised Land. "You HAVE to get them to play _Iron Maiden _music! You just HAVE to! The techno music is okay...but ever since meeting you, I've been looking into heavy music other than _Paramore _and _Uverworld_. Which is rather weird...somehow..."_

"_You like them?" Something strange happened at that moment. Something odd. Inner G could feel his heart in his chest and it felt like it was pumping rapidly and doing some crazy shit. But whatever this feeling was...he liked it. "I didn't expect it..."_

"_Hmm? Are you implying that I don't seem to be the type of person to like that kind of music?" Temari's tone grew hostile and almost challenging. The inner merely raised his hands to surrender and then laughed off the situation._

"_Actually, quite the opposite," In seconds, the inner seemingly slid from nowhere up to Temari's side and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. It should be mentioned that the flooring was not slippery, so it was impossible how he slid so coolly and easily. "I like a woman who can't admit this kinda stuff! As apposed to meh man, he prefers the chicks to be a bit more subtle and less wild which I guess is why he puts up with his weird girlfriend. I'm not like that, I'm a pretty unpredictable guy...thing...and I like a love interest whom has these characteristics too!"_

"_Wait a second," Without second thoughts, Temari pushed the advancing inner back and folded her arms as she stared at him. "Did you just indirectly confess AGAIN that you like me that way? And do you seriously consider ME a love interest?"_

"_Kinda...sorta...you know...it's a little..." Once again, looking into those passionate teal eyes was getting to him just as they always did. She always put him under her spell. The inner blushed vibrantly, grinning knowingly and averting his gaze._

"_Hmm." Temari's facial expression was indifferent, as if she didn't notice what kind of lovesick spell she had put on the inner against her knowledge. She looked back at the drinking contest, noticing that Kankuro was struggling to reach for another large and overflowing cup of beer and Hisako was trying not to puke her guts out whilst downing what appeared to be vodka (she couldn't catch any odor because there were to many whiffs in the atmosphere). "Let go of me and I will help you convince the guy in charge of the music to play _Iron Maiden _music. But first, it looks like the drinking contest is coming to a close..."_

_Inner G blinked, until Temari turned to give him a wink as she insisted that she would do anything to get some enjoyable music and headbanging in here. He couldn't help but be thoroughly impressed by her dedication to this._

**END OF FLASHBACK~**

**.**

"...What are they doing?" Denise asked with a blank expression at seeing both Temari and Inner G stare off into the distance in a dramatic manner. Almost like they were recalling a past memory. Raves weren't her style, that was why she didn't go the other night and didn't know about the all-out drinking contest her new-found BFF held (that, and she wanted to be of some help by fixing up their RV so it could handle a lot more chaos).

"They have just entered...the Twilight Zone, Denise." Gaara mentioned in monotone, so seriously.

"Uh...?"

"Sorry, I meant to say _flashback mode_."

Neither Temari or the epic inner had heard the exchange between Gaara and Denise. The left flashback mode and returned to earth.

"I think that we should form...a borderline between the both of us." Temari explained with not hint of regret in her tone as she met the inner's gaze locked on her solely. She was surprised to see that it wasn't even at her breasts that he obviously really wanted to see; his eyes met her face. Maybe it was just because her sparkly eyes reminded him of that sugary soda that he is devoted to.

"Um...yes...look, I do love _Iron Maiden _and I always have. That can't be undone no matter how hard I try. But, listen to me inner-whatever-the-hell-you-want-to-be-labeled, I don't think that we can ever be together. It's just not meant for us to become lovers or anywhere close." Temari met the inner's gaze, trying to imply that she meant serious business here. And the fleeting look of cloudy sadness in those jade orbs with dilating pupils didn't go past her awareness.

But else could she do? It was true that they couldn't go too far with this delicate relationship that they didn't have together. He was Gaara's inner, which meant that he MUST still be like a part of him. And this would be, sort of, kind of, indirect incest. Which was something she still couldn't stomach. And even if she did, kind of, sort of, have moments of weakness where she realized that Inner G was kind of cute at times and even somewhat nice to have around...she refused to think that she could EVER think of inner-whatever-the-hell-he-wants-to-be-labeled as a LOVE INTEREST of all things!

And, for the record, the kiss that she had given him was not out of desire at all. Even if it did become quite a scandal for those that had unfortunately witnessed the display before them. She only gave it to him because she _promised _to do so back when they were searching for a disappeared Yumi (in hindsight, that now seemed ridiculous after knowing the secret that she is an ex-Sand shinobi and was only sneaking off to ensure her skills weren't all that rusty). She had to keep him on his toes after all. That was the way she liked to keep people and that was just the way she rolled.

"Honestly, there's nothing wrong with-bad wording, 'cause I can think of a crap ton of flaws you have." Temari rubbed the back of her neck, trying to think of another wording she could use. Meanwhile, Gaara boredly looked at his watch. Wait, wait, BOREDLY isn't a word! OR IS IT? "Listen...it won't work. We need to establish a borderline between us."

"Borderline?" Gaara repeated randomly. Denise looked over at him and gave him a look that revealed how bored she was as well and obviously didn't want him to make this moment last any longer than it should.

"Yes, Gaara. A borderline that we won't cross." Temari looked back at the inner whom was staring at her chest and noticing how her black battle kimono really showed it off well. If she had known this, she would have probably freaked about him crossing the borderline. "If one of us shows romantic interest in each other in the same company, do anything that could be considered intimate, we will have crossed the unfortunate line and...something bad will happen to whomever initiated in it."

Inner G could only stare sadly. The thought of there now being some kind of theoretical borderline between him and the first girl he ever started to feel strongly about in a very absurdly long amount of time...that was kind of depressing.

But, then, he grinned wickedly as he let the realization sink in. This could prove to make their nonexistent relationship even more exciting; he liked to work for something forbidden that he wanted! All he had to do was purposely pass the borderline she theoretically drew up and within...some unknown passage of time...he would have her! Perfect plan! But he couldn't let her onto his plotting just yet...maybe his man would be interested though, 'cause he seemed reasonable and kind of cool.

**.**

**LATER**

It took several minutes, but everyone worked together and threw all of their belongings back into the beat up RV of theirs. The rules were kind of, sort of understand and accepted by everyone. Gaara noticed that he had gotten two texts by Matsuri and was tempted to read them, but then Inner G decided to do it for 'em because he explained that he always found the girl a bit...odd. He read over the texts for him (and promptly blushed vividly, quickly deleting both texts immediately and saying with much mortification in his voice that he didn't NEED to see those at all. Gaara and co. could only wonder what Matsuri had said).

Finally, Mr. Haruna hoisted the last suitcase into the RV. It was the one that contained his clothes, sport magazines, toiletries, and condoms. "Whew! That's the last of our luggage!" He wiped the sweat from his brow, pushing back his dark brown hair that had fallen to his forehead. Yumi climbed up on the side, balancing on the edge and resting her head on his shoulder tiredly, as she and him were doing most of the work while everyone else HANDED them the luggage and didn't put it up THEMSELVES. "I believe we're ready to head out, Yumi stop using me as a crutch."

"You never complain when Mom does it. Something to confess, perhaps?"

"Yumi..."

"Haha, yeah, just a little joke!"

"Okay, let's get inside the RV and plan out our next destination!" Kankuro called out, everyone else nodded in agreement and began to move closer to the RV.

"W-wait! E-e-everyone!"

Everyone paused and turned around to see two familiar teenagers hurry up to them panting and breathing with difficulty. And these two teenagers were none other than Hiroshi and Hisako Sato! Hiroshi was still wearing his same clothes from the previous night, but he had some obvious bandages around him ans some cuts and bruises weren't healed yet. Hisako's hair was still falling to her shoulders and she wore at hot pink t-shirt (that matched her dyed hair streaks), brown capri pants, and hot pink sneaker-like shoes.

The group let the siblings catch their breath as soon as they made their way towards them. But it took a very long amount of time and the only people whom showed irritation was Denise, Gaara, and Naruto. It should be mentioned that Naruto shouldn't have been irritated; after all, he could relate to them considering he had previously gone up increasingly long staircases back in North Garden. Why couldn't he relate to them now? Why?

After catching her breath and returning to reality, Hisako decided to talk first with obviously tearing eyes (but she couldn't cry now...she'd ruin her thick, smoky make-up). "Otou-San told us Naruto-Kun had said goodbye to him. We wanted to say goodbye personally as well, and Onii-San hasn't been admitted out of the hospital yet...but the poison in his veins have been removed and he won't die."

"That's good to know." Temari pointed out, meanwhile looking at her watch and wandering how much longer this would take and how much more space could possibly be filled. And that totally just broke the forth wall indirectly, let's call it out!

Upon hearing Temari's voice, Hiroshi looked over at her fondly. He didn't say anything, as he recalled what they had established last night...she didn't return his feelings even though she may have had a brief crush on him temporarily. Which was just fine with Inner G, because otherwise, he would have to kill 'em before going off with his man and their friends.

And dammit, Inner G still couldn't accept that Temari had fallen for the totally wrong person! She wasn't supposed to be interested in a loser like him, she needed...she needed to be with HIM! But, he thought somewhere in the back of his mind mischievously, she would probably freak out and warn him about that _borderline_ if he were to actually voice this (that's why he said this through his thoughts towards Gaara, whom rolled his eyes).

"Well, it was one crazy experience in this city!" Yumi put on a smile and hopped off the series of small stairs, walking over to Hisako with Kankuro and Inner-whatever-the-hell-he-wants-to-be-labeled at his side. "What are you guys gonna do now?"

"We'll most likely get ready to leave too." Hiroshi responded, switching his attention to Yumi. He couldn't help but notice her different appearance since the first time he saw her. Her hair was a darker shade of brown and longer and braided, her eyes were still big and blue, and her attire was definitely that from a ninja world. He wondered how she and her parents managed to alter their appearances. "Otou-San allowed us all to go on a road trip before we go off to college. Now that the festival's over, it's unlikely that we will still travel."

"But we're hoping to convince him to allow us to see West Village." Hisako mentioned with a hopeful smile tugging at her heavily glossy lips. Inner kind of wondered what type of lipstick she used, it sort of smelled like a combination of a flowery field and raspberries. Interesting scent, really. "Maybe we'll encounter there by some weird force of fate! Haha!"

"I hope we'll encounter again." Kankuro murmured sadly. His eyes were downcast, and Hisako seemed to notice this as her expression turned saddened as she looked over at him.

Hisako then pushed her healing brother aside as if she didn't care about him at the moment. She walked close to Kankuro and grabbed his hands, letting their fingers interlock together tightly. It was kind of like some kind of cheesy train station goodbye, at least, that was what Temari and Mr. Haruna thought of the moment. But Denise, Yumi, and even Naruto found the scene to be cute and were smiling like total idiots and going awwww over it.

Apparently, they watched too many old and sappy movies. In order to find this scene _that_ romantic. It probably would have been more romantic if Kankuro and Hisako could have dressed a little bit more...normally. They both looked odd and especially stood out.

There were so many memories drifting through their heads. And they didn't want that to end. In the short time of bonding, the two weirdos could only muster one realization to all of this: something was triggered inside. It was quite unusual how they managed to fall each other.

Kankuro originally had an eerily one-sided crush on that blond-haired girl he noticed Naruto's pink-haired teammate with the constant breaks for putting on lip balm talking to. And then he slowly began to put her in the past as he met up with several pretty and not so available girls that he attempted to seduce.

Hisako had been trying to cope after a pretty weird rejection from her childhood friend and secret crush. The guy was so gorgeous – literally, he looked a bit girly from behind because his body was slim and not manly and he liked to keep his dark blond hair shoulder-length and well-kept. But, sadly, he already had a girlfriend he didn't tell her about and didn't think of her that way, besides, he moved back to the Netherlands (why is that place getting mentioned so much? Pftt, who cares?).

And somehow, their strange personalities clicked. Maybe even more so than what everyone else around thought after having the, ahem, pleasure of walking in on them making out or unfortunately hearing them the previous night planning out how they would get drunk at the rave and then do _it_.

"You know what? We may be able to see each other again. Onii-San says that we'll probably have to return to the hotel to gather our things, let Otou-San apologize to the pretty lady at the check in desk for all of the destruction he and Naruto-Kun caused during their game, and then hunt down out RV before we can leave. It's a shame that it will be awhile before we arrive at West Village." Hisako's eyes began to get a twinkle in them as her pale fingers caressed his skin. "Don't keep me on your mind, Kankuro-Kun. I kind of...gathered that you're kind of a flirt anyway."

"KIND OF?" Hisako and Kankuro promptly flinched at the overwhelming volume of that shout. They turned to look at Yumi, whom had clasped a hand over her mouth and was looking a bit apologetic for her outburst.

They shrugged their shoulders and returned back into the moment. When Hisako looked back and met Yumi's embarrassed gaze and chuckled to herself. "Well, she did have a point. That was an understatement. But I don't care...because it makes for an interesting relationship. If Kankuro-Kun sets his eyes on some little slut...you get the point."

Hiroshi, in the background, could have sworn that a sweatdrop appeared on his head as he stood there un-noticed with a totally blank expression expression as if this was a manga. He couldn't believe that his sister actually _liked _the fact she would have to corner her boyfriend about forgetting about her long enough to fall for some pretty and stupid little slut that he encountered in her absence. For the record: he still had a bit of a crush on Temari and _sort of _hoped that she wouldn't forget him and would maybe give him a chance later. He wasn't into a weird relationships.

"Too bad we didn't get to have a quickie at that rave." Kankuro murmured sadly, remembering that Hisako had won the drinking contest but she was totally drunk and ran off with the keys. She had to be tackled and wrestled by some people before rightfully giving them back. And then she went and got into some Mountain Dew that Inner G wanted and spent the rest of the night dancing alongside Mr. Haruna. (Apparently, this happened while he was passed out drunk).

Once again, Hisako was relieved that she had a quirk of liking to wear thick makeup. Otherwise the blush rising on her cheeks would have been totally visible. She had a habit of blushing quite noticeably after all. "Well, um, at least that's something to look forward to. And maybe...it won't just be quick, maybe it will last a long and enjoyable while if you know what I mean~!" Hisako could only laugh off her embarrassment when Denise came out of nowhere and plugged her ears, drowning out the loud conversation about their plans for a sexual encounter by singing _Uverworld _songs very off key. "Kankuro-Kun...I will miss you."

Kankuro didn't need to exchange any more words. He took the hint by that comment and boldly grabbed a slightly unsuspecting Hisako's shoulders in a rough kiss. She had merely stared for several seconds, before melting into it and letting him take control because she always loved it when a guy could be so undeniably dominating. She didn't like a spineless pussyboy after all.

While they made out, everyone else except Temari and Hiroshi piled into the RV to give the two lovebirds over there some privacy. Well, they really didn't care if anyone watched them because that was just the way they rolled, but at least these people had the decency to not be voyeurs. Well, that's debatable with Denise because she had a secret fetish for watching people have sex from a safe distance...but, sssh, don't tell anyone because she finds it a bit shameful and disturbing.

And seeing as though their siblings were still...kissing for now or never, Temari and Hiroshi leaned against the RV just looking each other over for probably the last time in a while. What they didn't know was that they were being watched by one hell of a jealous Inner G, a reserved and honestly careless Gaara, and a too-curious-for-her-own-good Denise (or was she just looking at Kankuro and Hisako and getting a little, ahem, aroused?).

"Temari-Chan..." Temari couldn't help but blink. She previously assumed that Hiroshi had decided to drop those honorifics because he, like what an unreliable Hisako told her, he saw her as someone very important to him. Was that accurate or not? "I guess this is goodbye...at least until we meet up again by freaky circumstances." Hiroshi forced a chuckle, but he was secretly a bit down about having to separate. He couldn't believe that he managed to fall this far for someone who really couldn't see him as anything more than a friend, but this just happened sometimes.

And because the author isn't very fair when it comes to the cast of this story. Yes, the fourth wall has just been broken again, but nothing bad will happen because no certain character did. So there.

"Yeah..." Temari was not good with goodbyes. She awkwardly shifted her weight on each foot and then cleared her throat and glanced at a pretty teal-colored watch on her wrist that she (in fact) bought back at a stand last night on the way back to the hotel. "Look, Hiroshi, I am glad you survived. I'm kind of flattered you like me. But...honestly, it wouldn't work and was over before it could begin."

"I never have good luck with girls anyway."

"Well, join the club. I never have good luck with guys." Temari thought for a moment, before adding, "But we aren't in the same situation because I don't let simple crushes linger on for too long. Sorry, I had to point that out."

Seconds passed, and Hiroshi's forced smile fell from his face and he looked down at the ground. Purposely letting his raven bangs fall over his eyes so that maybe she couldn't notice his nervousness. "There, ah, won't be a goodbye kiss, I assume?"

"I don't believe so." Temari waved a hand and then smirked. "Because these lips tend to be reserved for the guys I particularly like in that way."

"But...your younger brother, Gaara-San, he told me that you promised to kiss that strange inner of his and you ended up doing that." Hiroshi pointed out knowingly, lifting his head and giving her a confused look.

Temari said nothing about that. She merely blushed hotly and grimaced, although, if Hiroshi was not mistaken, she did mutter some curses and say something about "having a violent chat with a certain someone". He was instantly a bit concerned.

A few more seconds went by, and then Temari started to go into a very long and winding rant about the borderline that she had previously established with Inner G. About how she couldn't believe that she broke it before it could even be made up theoretically.

Here's some bits and parts of that rant, the less vulgar ones:

"**WHAT THE HELL? I BROKE THE BORDERLINE BEFORE IT EVER HAPPENED! WHY DIDN'T I KNOW THIS SOONER? THAT'S JUST NOT RIGHT, NOT AT ALL! CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS SHIT, HIROSHI? I WASN'T SUPPOSED TO BREAK IT THIS SOON! WHY COULDN'T I HAVE JUST MADE THE LINE BEFORE I MADE THAT STUPID RPOMISE TO KISS THAT CRAZY INNER-WHATEVER-THE-HELL-HE-WANTS-TO-BE-LABELED?**"

Hiroshi was almost knocked to the ground by the volume of her rant. And that wouldn't have been considering he was supposed to stay in the hospital for a few more hours before checking out because he still had some pain and injuries that could easily open back and bleed.

At least Kankuro and Hisako were brought back from cloud nine. They stopped making out (much to Denise's disappointment) and exchanged a proper goodbye before turning on their heels and dragging their respected sibling back with them.

**.**

**MEANWHILE IN IRRELVANCE**

The doors of the North Garden hotel were thrown open, which aided in disturbing a lot of the people walking around and the pretty black-haired woman at the check-in desk whom was once again dressed fancily and adorning makeup.

A teenage girl staggered inside. She earned a lot of stares by the people, but she didn't care because...although they were embarrassing at first, she really didn't seem to care anymore. The girl had NATURAL (of all weird things) neon orange long hair falling over her shoulders and back but it was covered in dirt and sticking out of place almost everywhere. She had brown eyes that were bloodshot from definite lack of sleep. Her skin was pale, and she smelled of cheap cologne to hide the fact she hadn't showered in three whole days. She was no older than seventeen. And she seemed to be wearing a very plain white tank top underneath a long-sleeved brown vest, with denim short shorts that didn't look appealing because of her naturally puffy-looking thighs people couldn't stop being disgusted by, and she wore shinobi sandals.

Resting atop her shoulder, was a tiny blue lizard with a black eye and cut marks over it's body. But it was still smiling quite epically as if nothing was wrong with the world.

Even after a several amount of uncountable seconds, the normal people were still staring in either disgust or amusement by this freaky chick's horrible condition. And a group of giggly, hormone-attacked teenage girls were babbling amongst their clique of friends about how cute the beaten lizard was.

Well, at least SOMEONE appreciated his existence. The Fail Girl over here, Iris, needed to be more like them. He was Akatsuki, a (kinda, sorta, social outcast) of the hidden land of dragons! Just because he wasn't big and powerful...or intelligent...cunning...drop-dead gorgeous, or as awesome as he thought he was...does that mean he should be treated badly? And him being here hitching on her shoulder was all her fault anyway!

If Iris hadn't been a fool and attempted to summon the boss, the super-awesome Mist Dragon, he wouldn't be summoned here to her "aid" while recovering from her previous abuse! She should blame herself a lot more than she does. Because a lot of things that she gets herself into are caused by herself. But she can't admit it.

So why did Akatsuki still enjoy filling in for the Mist Dragon? Aw, who the hell cares right now? Iris and Akatsuki don't even matter at all!

Iris stumbled her way over to the check-in desk and caught the black-haired woman's attention with ease. Well, actually, this may have been due to the fact the woman found the blue lizard on her shoulder to be adorable.

"I've been told that a family of three are staying at this hotel with some freaky friends. The Harunas." Iris' eyes narrowed as she looked at the woman get out a book and flip through it's pages to find whom she was talking about. "I need to speak with them, I have come here for revenge for the way they killed by entire family by burning them to a crisp!"

"Yes, yes they were staying here for a few days." The woman replied casually, the smile on her lips so fake but easily to put on after being perfected so much. "But, you've come at a bad time. They checked out, saying something about how they were going to leave the city and I don't know...where they're all going."

Iris didn't say anything. She stood there totally speechless, eyes about to pop from the sockets if they grew any larger.

Akatsuki was just as casual as ever. Upon noticing his "partner's" terrible luck, he chuckled. "Man, they're always so far ahead of you, Iris!"

**.**

**BACK WITH THE SAND SIBS AND CO.**

"You know, Temari would probably kick your butts if she knew you were watching her say goodbye to Hiroshi." Yumi mentioned to a curious Inner G and Denise whom were balancing together with difficulty in a chair in front of the right window.

"Actually, Yumi," Denise mentioned, her tone full of undisguised amusement as she pressed her face closer into the window. "I was looking at Kankuro make out with that flat-chested girl dressed in outrageous clothing. It's actually a bit arousing."

"Are you a voyeur?"

"...When Madame Star was still, ahem, in this life with us, she would always stalk the people whom came in for her love potions and would watch the customers use them on their love interests and make out or go straight to sex with them. She was a bit of a voyeur because she didn't have enough privacy to look at porn alone and her policeman boyfriend was always out on the job."

"That didn't answer my question."

"Yeah...well...I was _getting to that_!"

Yumi rolled her eyes and then lied back down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling and smiling fondly as she recalled a few important things that happened in this RV. Some important things that she could barely forget. Like the first time Salamander attacked, or the random earthquake that drove Gaara to give her an out of character now or never confession, or the time that she stayed up late with Temari watching her first R-rated movie which was some type of friendship comedy about two hot guys whom had bad luck with women and were hellbent on making their lives and selves more exciting to impress them.

"Yumi," Mrs. Haruna scolded as she looked over at her daughter from the counter (she was preparing some lunch for everyone. A healthy one. Kankuro would most likely sneak in some more junk food because of it). "I believe you forgot me and your father's warnings in the past about pressuring a person to admit their sexual fetishes. Your father is probably disappointed in your right now, right dear?"

Mrs. Haruna, Yumi, Inner G, and Denise all turned to look at Mr. Haruna obliviously sitting at the table flipping through a soccer magazine with a huge amount of interest in his eyes. He obviously did not hear them. Probably due to the fact that he forgot to turn on that crappy hearing aid he had been given.

This time, no one bothered to do anything and returned to what they were doing at hand. Mrs, Haruna still chopped up some vegetables for a salad, Yumi returned to flashback mode, and Inner G and Denise continued to stare out and watch Kankuro hoist Temari up against her vulgar protests and then toss her into the driver's seat before climbing into the passenger himself.

No one bothered to ask where Gaara and Naruto were. Although it should be mentioned that they were both in the former's room looking up some stuff on a laptop. God knows that they could have been doing. Yumi guessed porn, Mrs. Haruna guessed research to a complicated topic, and Denise guessed making stupid Youtube videos. But it's unlikely it was any of these things.

And then everyone froze up. They just realized something very important, that affected the rest of their trip deeply.

"Where do we go next...?" Was everyone's same comment said at the exact same time.

It looks like the trip was far from over, and that meant that there would be a hell of a lot more chaos brewing from the shadows and coming their way in the _very near _future!

**To Be Continued (to something more exciting? Hell yes.)**

**.**

**I can't believe it's been a month since the last update. No, no I'm not dead. But so many things have been going on lately in the following order: college and a very sucky part-time job, hanging out with all of my friends (for old time's sake, donning some cosplay around the house and acting like a bunch of freaks that we all are), cruising the internet for new anime to get into, getting over the giggly and lovestruck attitude I've unfortunately developed since I accepted my boyfriend's proposal on Valentine's Day, and reading some good books (Star Wars! Call me a sci-fi nerd and I'll punch you in your face). Not to mention, between all of that, stay up late with StormofyourDestiny trying to plan out our collab fic that's still in the works.**

**If anyone cares, I recently published two new fics which probably prove I'm still writing! "That Night Under The Stars" which is a Pokemon fic, and "Meeting Miss Perfection" which is a Death Note fic. And if you're interested in either, please click over to them and give a read. Maybe even leave a review. *I AM HINTING AT SOMETHING SO OBVIOUSLY RIGHT NOW LOL***

**All of my other fics still ongoing will hopefully have their latest chapters up...soon...they're still in the works. Curse my lack of free time! (And that's putting it mildly...)**

**I realize that the Netherlands was mentioned a lot in this chapter. A reference to the fact I have always wanted to visit that place but probably never will get to. The closest I'll ever be is...Wikipedia and online pics. TT_TT At least Yumi may have the chance to get there, if they step on it...they could probably get there in one week tops. LOL...?**

**Wow, I'm rambling like an idiot now. I gotta learn to shut myself up when it gets awkward. *Makes mental note to study how to shut herself up when needed* Anyway, read and review~!**

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**


	3. Heading To West Village

**Let's make this chapter a bit fun. If you can point out all to most of the various references thrown in (all are in some form of dialogue, so don't worry about their actions or decisions), you get some cupcakes StormofyourDestiny supplied me to bribe, and you also get a bit of a peek at the events of the next chapter.**

**References included are mostly three from cartoons, one is from an anime, and one is from a certain movie series. Good luck, and please enjoy the crack that lies ahead!**

**Disclaimer: Ah, there are many fun things I would do if I owned Naruto or the Sand Sibs... *Evil grin***

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip**

**Chapter 44: Heading To West Village**

**.**

"Okay, everyone! Drop what you're doing so that we can decide what are next moves will be!" Temari called out, and everyone ALMOST literally dropped what they were doing to walk over to the driver's seats. Yumi grabbed Temari's upper arm and helped pull her out from around the back of the driver's seat so that she wouldn't have to waste time.

It was like, Yumi thought randomly, the time that she, Naruto, and Gaara were at that hospital the other night after visiting Hiroshi and decided to take the elevator rather than the stairs. But her parents, Hisako, and Kankuro were bent on taking the elevator even if he had previously just been fixed and was incredibly slow. This was just a random thought because the inner machinations of her mind are an enigma...

Anyway, that's beside the point. Gaara and Naruto walked out of the former's room with a laptop and placed that on the table before joining everyone else. It was at that point when Kankuro reached for a map that had been bought at a simple stand in North City and tossed it to an eager-to-catch-it Mr. Haruna so that they could decide where to go.

Kankuro just wanted to sit away from everyone else and brood for a minute. He hated having to leave Hisako behind, although they technically weren't even away from the city yet. What a twist of fate.

Hisako was the only strange girl that he had ever met. Not only was she attractive (despite having tiny breasts, her butt was still nice to look at however), but her quirky attitude and very strange charm had won him over only...let's do some math here...four hours since they parted ways for the first time. He was sure that this time, he had finally found someone who could overlook how weird he was up close and realize that still managed to fit in with everyone else even if it wasn't THEM. But now they were gone, and probably would never see each other again.

Dammit, now he was starting to get angsty about it. So, quickly, Kankuro grabbed an iPod of his that was this really old version (he really needs to get the latest, maybe he will in another chapter), and then put in some earbuds and proceeded to try and cheer up by blasting _Shakira_ music.

"Oh my God, who the hell cares...?" Denise randomly shouted amongst everyone else. She didn't care that she blurted out that comment rather than thinking it, because she wanted to move things along. She liked everything fast-paced EXCEPT when playing cards. "It doesn't matter to me where we go, just as long as we all get along and I can get some inspiration for my manga! I really don't want my dreams to go down the drain!"

"How can you be a mangaka if you're not Japanese?" Gaara randomly asked Denise, as he was the one standing closer to her (aside from Mrs. Haruna, who actually accepted Denise to a degree because she claims to like the _Dragon Ball _franchise). The aspiring mangaka could only turn slowly and force a nervous giggle because she had never thought of a good enough answer to that question.

"Weeeeeell...I was born in Korea...that technically makes me Asian." Denise stated matter-of-factly. As Gaara leaned in a bit closer along with Mrs. Haruna, they noticed that she did look like she was over from that side of the world up close. Honestly, Naruto was a bit furious with himself because HE expected her to be Vietnamese.

"So do you like K-pop?" Gaara asked randomly. Why did he do this? Seriously, does it even matter?

Denise did not answer him, she merely tilted her head to the side. Secretly, she did like K-pop, but she loved a ton of Finnish groups so much more and that left her so confused all the time as to why. But she had to admit that she liked what she was, because she hadn't seen much Koreans on this side of the Modern World.

"HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO THE NETHERLANDS...?" Yumi shouted excitedly, randomly popping up in front of Denise as her eyes danced with sparkles of child-like curiosity and her body trembled with awe at what answer she may receive. And the hope that she may tell about her nonexistent travels to the Netherlands.

Denise was just freaked out by this and couldn't find any way to explain that she wasn't Dutch at all, she had never been to the Netherlands, and she couldn't tell the difference between the Dutch and the German (which was just sad) so she merely ignored her. And really, the only person to find Yumi's child-like actions endearing was Gaara.

But naturally, Inner G had to point this out to all (because that's his job as an inner, duh) and proclaim in Gaara's defense that Yumi's quirky moments were cute to him. And this led his man to quickly shove him aside with a wave of sand.

Temari looked around at all that just happened. She was far from amused. Although it was interesting to know that her new-found friend happened to be Korean (she was guessing she was from Taiwan). Denise's nationality was just that damn ambiguous to all apparently.

"We all really need to shut up and return to the topic at hand." Temari proceeded to unravel the map, and everyone minus Kankuro gathered around to look at the poorly drawn map of the Modern World. Seriously, it looked like whomever made the thing was ten years old. A very untalented ten year old.

In fact, Inner G was so repelled by it's un-epicness that he went over to the vegetables Mrs. Haruna had been chopping expertly and gripped some very delicious-looking tomatoes for throwing. "Who the hell drew this...?"

"You idiot!" Mrs. Haruna shrieked very randomly, pointing a finger at Inner G. No, she wasn't flipping him off...but Temari was guessing it was only a matter of time before she did that. These two snapped at each other too much ever since she got his name pronunciation wrong. "You don't even KNOW talent!"

"No talent! No talent!"

Inner G proceeded to chase a screeching Mrs. Haruna around the RV about to throw the tomatoes (they're fruit, yes. But Mrs. Haruna is one of those who love to argue it's a veggie and she was making mini salads anyway). He was yelling "no talent", more like chanting it. And she was protesting that he didn't even HAVE a free salad bar with him and he had no reason to do this to her, she was also horrified of what may happen if he splatters those tomatoes.

Because we all know that tomatoes are so fucking delicious. Argument invalid. No questions.

**.**

**LATER**

At long last, the childish chaos ceased. Everyone couldn't make up there minds about where to head out next considering they didn't have any money anymore. They were not back in their world, Yen was of no value. And they were not in Europe, especially not in Holland, so the random inner's Euro was not of value either. Which can only mean that this was going to suck.

Should they all return to their homes? WHY WOULD THEY...?

This trip has been awesome despite the several moments of weirdness and mayhem! And a great thing to all of this was that a total of only two days has probably went by in the Ninja World! Time differences were astounding! And why is all of this punctuated enthusiastically? No, no, that does not count as breaking he fourth wall as no character stated this.

Kankuro realized that this could prove to make his life perfect and back in order. He decided to suggest they could visit a place called West Village next, and of course pick up some money along the way for when they do arrive. He had recalled hearing the Sato siblings mention they were heading here and it seemed fitting he encounter his new crush as soon as possible. Because his crush on her seemed to be lasting longer than usual, at least until he ran into a brand new girl of the week to distract him.

Everyone could see through his suggestion. It was blatantly obvious that his heart ached for the very strange, heavily-reliant-on-cosmetics girl.

Although Yumi insisted that she wanted to go to the Netherlands, everyone tuned out to that and made up their minds to go to West Village. Although they knew nothing of the place, Naruto mentioned they should Google it soon to get a general picture of it. Now that, that was something they did not tune out from. (Yumi: 0 Naruto: 1)

Everyone got settled in once again, and Temari put the key into the ignition. She was sure that there would not be another one of those vibrations seeing as though Denise fixed it up. Wishful thinking, Temari, because Denise sucks at mechanics unlike how she was a master at card games. That is saying something.

An infamously rough vibration started up: WORSE then usual. It was much too intense and almost resembled that of an earthquake dangerously high on the Richter scale.

The vibration caused in the following manner: Kankuro to fall to the left into Temari, Mr. Haruna to scream as he threw his magazine and bump heads with Naruto – whom had previously been trying to turn on Gaara's laptop which bounced all over the room and into the passenger seat, Gaara fell to the floor in a crumpled heap with Inner G shouting in horror and clawing into his back for support, Mrs. Haruna to dive to the floor dramatically and catch her salad before it fell ruined, and Denise to land sitting on the couch with Yumi being thrown into her lap as she hugged around her neck in absolute terror.

When it was over, a disturbing silence filled the RV. No one dared to say anything or even release their held breathes. But needless to say; that was officially the most INTENSE rough vibration this durable vehicle had given them. And maybe this was all Denise's fault. Denise didn't want to earn any glares, pointed fingers, or lack of acceptance, but she knew she would receive all of this as soon as they calmed down.

Her heat finally relaxed and was beating at a normal, healthy pace. As apposed to previously when it was pounding and she could hear the blood roaring in her ears and body. Temari then careless shoved her brother back into the passenger seat as he had been crushing her with his weight. She curiously turned her head to survey the damage.

"Denise...what the hell did you do to our RV?"

"I am so sorry, I tried-"

"NEVER AGAIN."

Denise could feel the tears well in her eyes from Temari's sharp glare that stabbed her repeatedly – not literally of course.

Luckily, the dramatic mood was soon destroyed or forgotten if you will. Everyone got up and tried to recover from that jolt it left behind, Gaara felt as though he had a case of whiplash that Inner G was complaining about because he shared his pain, and then Mr. Haruna got up off his knees from where he had been collapsed and sitting on Naruto's stomach as he yelled out in agony, began to look around in confusion as he asked aloud:

"Where...where am I? Dear, can you stop cradling your salad and tell me why our daughter and the two of us are in an unfamiliar RV with freaks?"

"DAD...!" Yumi had screeched in disbelief and sorrow one releasing an ashamed Denise and holding her head in her hands whilst her eyes became glossy with tears. "HE LOST HIS MEMORY! JESUS, WHY...?"

"Hey! I take offense to that; I'M the one with long-term memory loss!" Denise snapped indignantly once peeling herself off of the floor and pointing a finger at Yumi (no, she was not giving her THAT finger). "Like...like right now, I can't even remember if I began to like K-pop after claiming J-pop sucked or if it was the OTHER way around..."

Temari had already tuned out to their bitching and was already backing out of the parking lot of North City and driving away from it. Yumi still wept about her Dad's brief case of memory loss and began to cry into Gaara's chest quite obnoxiously for everyone excluding him 'cause he was used to it. Denise was still offended that she had been slyly insulted. SHE has the memory loss here, and can't remember if she likes K-pop or J-pop to save her life!

Mr. Haruna had wandered around the RV in much confusion for several minutes. He was at a loss of understanding why he was surrounded by freaks, who he was in general, did he ever win the lottery in Las Vegas, and why did he have a hearing aid in his ear. Everyone was beyond irritated by him, but Naruto came to his rescue by shutting him the hell up by hitting him with Gaara's laptop that Kankuro had just handed back to him.

Yumi cried harder when she saw her father black out. Naruto could only gulp and insist that he was sure he didn't just murder him. Yeah, he totally didn't. Oh God, right...?

**.**

**LATER AGAIN**

He knew he was conscious, but all he could see was darkness when trying to open his lids. Mr. Haruna could hear himself breathe, he could hear hysterical sobs and the panicked voice of Naruto. And he could do this due to the fact his crappy hearing aid was finally on and working like it should be.

Mr. Haruna finally fought back the urge to stop fighting drowsiness, his eyes opened fully and he struggled to sit up from where he was lying on the couch.

"W-what's going on? Why am I lying on the couch?" Mr. Haruna asked in alarm, looking at a now-gasping-and-smiling-as-well-as-tearful Yumi, and a very relieved everyone else excluding Temari whom was driving. "Why does...why does my head hurt?"

"First of all, Dad, can you remember all of these people?" Yumi asked cautiously and tearfully, she didn't want his memory loss to be permanent. He was still forty after all and shouldn't have memory problems yet!

"Yes, I can. Yumi. Naruto. Gaara. Denise. Kankuro. My wonderful and beautiful wife. And Inner-whatever-you-like-to-be-called."

"YAY~!" Yumi, forgetting that her dad was injured from Naruto's carelessness, jumped onto the couch and attacked him in a glomp like she tended to do when very gleeful. "I would have hated Naruto forever if he murdered you, I'm so happy you're okay!"

"What happened to me back there? How long have I been out cold?"

"I have been counting the minutes, you were only out of it for nineteen minutes and Temari is driving us out of the parking lot of North City so that we can head out for West Village, dear. Naruto was stupid and he hit you with our daughter's boyfriend's laptop after you gained memory loss from the infamous vibration." Mrs. Haruna explained. She then looked at the young, ambitious mangaka beside her whom was hanging her head in shame. She gasped and then shot her a comforting smile. "But I'm sure Denise didn't mean to make the vibrations even worse than they already were! And you have to realize that we didn't have to pay her for it; because we're flat-out broke anyway!"

Kankuro sighed and shook his head. "Don't remind us we're broke. Besides, we would not be if this place accepted Yen as a currency...what the hell is wrong with this place?"

"Kankuro, the author lives somewhere in New York in the USA. I doubt she would add Yen in this story because she probably doesn't know the equivalent of it to USA currency." Gaara explained matter-of-factly with, again, no tone whatsoever as it this really mattered.

But he just broke the fourth wall again which now could not be repaired with tape or glue. It was ruined forever.

"Oh, I've got a bad feeling about this..." Kankuro said aloud under his breath once hearing him break the fourth wall again. Somewhere, he knew the author was facepalming right now. Oh God, now HE just broke it! No!

Mr. Haruna was about to pick himself up off the couch, he was merely pushed down without a struggle by Yumi (whom had gotten back to her feet) and Denise. And Kankuro snapped that he shouldn't move or else all of the excess movement could put a strain on that bump on the back of his head.

All of a sudden, the RV made this sharp turn off the side of the road. Everyone that was standing fell to their knees ahead of time to ensure that it wasn't another infamous rough vibration or an earthquake. Mr. Haruna had found some limited strength within himself to peek through the window behind the couch and tell them Temari had only parked off the side of the road for some reason that was behind him.

"Why did you stop the RV?" Mr. Haruna asked, looking over at Temari whom was taking out the key and opening her door.

"Our RV just ran out of gas the second I turned sharply off the side of the road."

"WHAT?" Everyone else chorused in utter horror at what was going to happen next, or at least what they thought. They all just assumed together that this was their punishment for breaking the fourth wall again. But was this true? Do YOU know?

Denise was the first to dart through the RV and throw herself into the passenger seat. She shoved her face into the windshield and was stunned to notice that they weren't anywhere near gas stations! There were a lot of other different buildings and some countryside...but absolutely no gas stations!

"Come on, we're all going to have to get the RV to a gas station. If we can combine our weight, we should be able to combine our weight and power to push it all the way."

"But Temari...! This RV probably weighs a ton...!" Denise cried out tiredly, she threw herself into the driver seat and grasped a blank Temari's upper arms desperately as if to change her mind about the decision. "I'M A WEAK PERSON! Or at least...I think so...you know, now I can't remember..."

Yumi facepalmed. She, for once, was the only person whom was giving an accurate reaction to the weird shit that everyone has been saying lately. But this will probably never happen again because that would be OOC of her. She was just getting more and more fed up with Denise before the day even ended.

**.**

**ONE HOUR AND A HALF LATER**

"**PUSH...!**" Kankuro's voice thundered over the not so bustling roads.

"**AAAAAAH!**" Everyone else in the group cried out as they tried to combine their strength to push the RV along the roads. Even Mr. Haruna, whom was still injured, was out there.

Geez, show an injured man some sympathy...

"**PUSH!**"

"**AAAAAH!**

"**PUUUSH!**"

"**RAAAAAH...!**"

"**DON'T STOP PUSHING! PUUUUUUUUSH!**"

"_**FUCK YOU, I'M PUSHING SO HARD MY ARMS ARE PARALZED!**_" Inner G yelled among the choruses of "RAAAAAH!"

**.**

**AND FINALLY, AT THE NEAREST GAS STATION**

A young man whom was at least nineteen sat outside the gas station on a bench, he was exhausted from the busy day. This little gas station was nothing fancy, it was small and shabby with him and a few other people working to generate some cash by filling up vehicles' with fuel. He had previously done about eleven cars which included one SUV and an RV. He was at his limits.

The guy had somewhat dark skin, tanning form all of the excess time in the sun he spent every goddamn day at this place. His hair reached his shoulders, it was copper-colored and somewhat messed at the moment. His eyes were big and either green or brown (maybe it was hazel? Who knows?), and he was somewhat tall. A little muscular, but not really much. And he wore a crimson tank top, faded and ripped blue jeans, and shabby brown boots.

"**ALMOST THERE! PUUUUUUUUSSSSSH, PUSH LIKE YOU'VE NEVER PUSHED BEFORE!**"

"**WE! ARE! PUSHING! KANKURO! RAAAAAAAAA...AAAAH! YEAH!**"

The exhausted young man briefly got a second wind as soon as he heard all that yelling and grunting. He immediately arose and bolted off the small porch that led into the building and he bolted over to the gas pumps to see what all of the commotion was about.

Meanwhile, a beaten and yet very capable RV was pushed over to the first gas pump. A group of freaky people were the ones causing this to happen, combing all of their inner strength and power to get this thing where it needed to be. Honestly, the worker was shocked by the sight and also feeling like he admired all of those people for being able to achieve such a highly unlikely feet. And God knows HOW LONG they had been working together to shove that heap of weight! He should really be helping them now, and not just standing there in awe with his jaw defying gravity and hanging around in the air.

Everyone had been literally standing and shoving the RV to get it to move, walking along with it, and even used things like sand, chakra strings, gusts of ferocious wind courtesy of Temari and the random breezes, Mr. Haruna's secret strength he harbored from everyone else, Mrs. Haruna and Yumi combining a jutsu to make a crap ton of weapons build up and shove the vehicle too, Naruto even created over nine thousand clones to help move it along (if you are like Mrs. Haruna, you just laughed at that comment). Denise was...Denise...she suggested they stop briefly to play war, the card game. But nobody listened to her because that would have slowed them down.

Kankuro was quite epic in making everyone shove the RV. The way he kept madly hollering "PUSH!" was unbelievable and almost totally motivating to give everyone a new strength within them to push for what seemed to be forever.

"AND...WE'RE HERE! AHAHOHAHO~ THAT'S SO GREAT!" Denise shouted randomly upon noticing they had finally made it. She briefly had a man expression on her face which could only be described as 'XD' and everyone else stared in either mock or somewhat genuine pity at how insane that had made her.

"Denise, stop being so mad. It's kind of embarrassing." Temari deadpanned once she, like everyone else brought their either aching and throbbing or paralized hands back to themselves and stopped staring at the weird girl.

Immediately, Denise calmed down. She then smiled cutely as she met her friend's gaze. "Yeah, that is true, but everyone has to at least be a little unusual if they want to be a mangaka."

"That is...pretty true."

Temari would have added more, but she could feel someone staring in a very lusty manner at her. She glowered and turned slowly on her heels to see Inner G now suddenly standing at her side and letting his eyes roam all over her body randomly. Okay, she knew that she rocked this violet sundress that surprisingly still did not clash with her ninja sandals. But did that mean he had to gawk at her?

Even had to comment flirtatiously and go over the borderline...! "'Ya know, that dress is so beautiful on 'ya. Would you consider going headbanging to _Metallica _in that with meh?"

"You're going over the borderline...! Oh my God, why are you doing this? I can't dance with you, we already established this borderline and here you go wreaking it without shame! What the hell is wrong with you, Gaara why do you have to have such an annoying Inner! This isn't right at all, we have to do something! I feel like I just broke the fourth wall! Oh my God, just stop this insanity!"

All of this noise was severely getting to Mr. Haruna. Sure, he liked to hear. The world was full of great things to hear and be in the know of. But this was not one of those times he enjoyed it. And he since he didn't know how to turn on or off his hearing aid, he finally slammed a fist to the RV (before shouting incoherently for a moment in severe pain), he succeeded in getting everyone's attention, however, when shouting:

"TEMARI! MAN UP OR I'LL BEAT YOU WITH MY PEACE PRIZE!"

And everyone whom had been talking instantly shut the fuck up.

Mr. Haruna smirked uncharacteristically smugly by the response he received. Silence. He would have to remember to use this threat more often...

**To Be Continued.**

**.**

**So did you catch any of the references? LOL.**

**This chapter was insanely fun to write, it took unexpectedly longer to publish due to some scenes having to be almost totally re-written. I wanted to get it just right. The fact it's made it to three chapters is sort of, not really, a big deal. I see that it's slow on the reviews, but I hope to see more so that I can have the motivation to go on. Is anyone out there? *Hears crickets***

**The next chapter will be interesting, I assure you.**

**See this button? V It takes seconds to write a review, two seconds to make an author ecstatic and motivated. :)**

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**


	4. Chaos At The Gas Station

**Disclaimer: Naruto and the Sand Siblings are, as we are all aware of, property of Masashi Kishimoto and doesn't belong to me, you, or any fanfiction author. Let's just make this clear and to the point. :'(**

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2**

**Chapter 45: Chaos At The Gas Station**

**.**

**PREVIOUSLY WITH THE SAND SIBS AND CO:**

_**"ALMOST THERE! PUUUUUUUUSSSSSH, PUSH LIKE YOU'VE NEVER PUSHED BEFORE!"**_

_**"WE! ARE! PUSHING! KANKURO! RAAAAAAAAA...AAAAH! YEAH!"**_

_The exhausted young man briefly got a second wind as soon as he heard all that yelling and grunting. He immediately arose and bolted off the small porch that led into the building and he bolted over to the gas pumps to see what all of the commotion was about._

_Meanwhile, a beaten and yet very capable RV was pushed over to the first gas pump. A group of freaky people were the ones causing this to happen, combing all of their inner strength and power to get this thing where it needed to be. Honestly, the worker was shocked by the sight and also feeling like he admired all of those people for being able to achieve such a highly unlikely feet. And God knows HOW LONG they had been working together to shove that heap of weight! He should really be helping them now, and not just standing there in awe with his jaw defying gravity and hanging around in the air._

...

_Kankuro was quite epic in making everyone shove the RV. The way he kept madly hollering "PUSH!" was unbelievable and almost totally motivating to give everyone a new strength within them to push for what seemed to be forever._

_"AND...WE'RE HERE! AHAHOHAHO~ THAT'S SO GREAT!" Denise shouted randomly upon noticing they had finally made it. She briefly had a man expression on her face which could only be described as 'XD' and everyone else stared in either mock or somewhat genuine pity at how insane that had made her._

_"Denise, stop being so mad. It's kind of embarrassing." Temari deadpanned once she, like everyone else brought their either aching and throbbing or paralized hands back to themselves and stopped staring at the weird girl._

**CURRENTLY WITH THE SAND SIBS AND CO:**

"Hold me, I'm scared." Naruto whispered shakily to Denise, he was stunned to have heard what may have been some form of narration without any of this cast saying it. He was about to wrap his arms around her shoulders and hold her tightly in fear.

But Denise didn't want that to happen. She liked Naruto, but that was strictly platonic. If he latched onto her life a scared damsel in distress, that would make their relationship seem ambiguous towards any onlookers and they would get some shippers on deck. So she dodged his actions, and he then gave a strangled chuckle in embarrassment from how he had reacted.

Denise was positive she could never fall for Naruto. Hell, she would never fall for anyone in general. And although she would really need to experience that feeling for the first time to be able to write out the romance parts in her not so planned out manga she wants to write, she didn't want to.

Because she wasn't sure what she was attracted to. Was it guys or girls? Or both? God, this was so complicated to think about, her long-term memory loss was so bad she couldn't remember if her first crush was on a boy or girl! Gah, how awkward!

The sound of the _Evanescence _song, Lithium, began to break through the awkward silence. Everyone looked around in confusion before all pairs of eyes centered on Gaara digging through his pockets to answer his cellphone.

**.**

**MEANWHILE AT THE KAZEKAGE MANSION, SOMEWHERE IN THE HIDDEN SAND**

"Are you sure prank calling Lord Gaara will be fun, Baki?"

"Trust me. We finally finished repainting Temari's walls and we cleaned up most of the pizza boxes, beer cans, and tattered remains of furniture from the party. Why can't we have some fun?"

"About that party, Baki, I'm still very mad at you. And that's why you are personally helping me clean this shit up."

"I know, I'm sorry about that incident. But the good news is that everyone had a crazy and fun time. We all needed that, and I don't regret getting drunk and winning the attention of those attractive women."

Matsuri rolled her eyes. Her and Baki were now seated on the floor of one of the halls of the siblings' home. And huddled around the latter's cellphone. As they have said previously, they finished cleaning up that part of the mansion and were soon to be done completely unless something else went wrong.

Baki decided that Matsuri was missing her crush too much. So, noting her suffering, he decided she should talk to him and release some sexual tension. He decided on prank calling since it was not known whether or not Gaara had caller I.D. And if he did...oh shit...

They would get burned, as Gaara was too good.

Baki had already dailed Gaara's number, the two waited until his familiar voice could be heard asking whom was calling. The both quickly tried to not snicker in anticipation, before the not so trustworthy Sand jounin tossed the cellphone into Gaara's ex-student's hands.

For seconds, Matsuri wondered what to say. Before she remembered that she thought of herself as quite the master at disguising her voice and sounding like other people. She used this to her advantage and, started faking some sexy moans and gasps into the phone as she held it out for Baki to overhear his confused remarks.

"Oh~ O-oh, Gaa~ra~ tell me that you want me! Tell me that I'm the only girl for you, I'm simply melting from this pleasure!" Matsuri basically yelled suggestively into the phone, disguising her voice as Sari (because Sari's feelings for him always seemed to be even more lusty than Matsuri's – if that was even possible) and panting and moaning throughout each word.

"Who...is this?"

"Sa...SARI! Oooooh, oh holy crap, my nipples are so erect and my womanhood is burning! Gaara, Gaara please tell me that you're feeling the intensity of this moment too! Please tell me you're answering this call with your hand gripping at your dick and the flow of your-" Baki, whom had been once trying to surpass his uncharacteristic laughter, was now hysterically laughing in the background like a madman as Matsuri flinched and tried her best to sound close to an orgasm before Gaara caught their act.

"...What. The. Fuck. Are you talking about, Matsuri? And-and is that Baki LAUGHING in the background? And, above all else, isn't Sari supposed to be out on a mission I assigned her for or did she skip and attend a house party somewhere and get drunk and start running with bathtubs and dancing to _Nine Days _songs?"

Matsuri's eyes enlarged in total horror at the change of events. She was quick to look over at Baki for any kind of answers, but he merely shrugged his shoulders once the laughter subsided. She fumbled for something to say, until she got it.

"Uhm...aaah...THIS WAS ALL BAKI'S IDEA, NOT MINE! DON'T PUNISH ME, I DON'T LIKE S&M ACTS!" And with that said/screamed, Matsuri was quick to end the call. God knows what could have happened if she didn't, and this would be okay now. If only she didn't have to admit she wasn't into S&M because it was too intense for her.

Wait, what? Would Gaara even do something like that with her...?

**.**

**BACK AT THE GAS STATION**

Shaking his head with mock pity, Gaara cooly shut the phone off and then stuffed it away into one of those nonexistent pockets containing hammerspace. Inner G had come over after flirting with Temari and briefly listening to her rant about the borderline, asking who was calling and if he could straighten them out.

Gaara never gave the epic inner a yes or no. Which sucked for him, because Inner G REALLY wanted to be accepted sooner or later. The only times he ever did had to be back in the first half of the story when him and his man were trapped in that sucky elevator at North Garden and people stood up for him against the annoying old guy (who is thankfully rotting in the impromptu grave the check-in lady gave him. Yay for dark comedy!), when he was out searching for a missing Yumi, and when he had been leaving the hotel after the rave and a random soda-seller at a stand urged him to buy some of his Mountain Dew (spoiler: Kankuro and Temari both dragged him away from it as the inner kicked and yelled and made quite the scene for Naruto, Gaara, Yumi, and Yumi's parents).

Maybe there were other times he had felt needed. After all: he is Gaara's inner and that therefore causes him to have to reveal to all what his true thoughts about things were. Whatever Gaara didn't hear, he had to hear. Whatever Gaara didn't say or do, he had to say and do. And this goes to all inner selves whom are assigned to a person after the next incarnation. Not many do get to be in an actual body like this, Inner G was thrilled about the fact. Although he still could have lived without his true form being revealed...but no one had to know about that plot point yet (that includes you).

The young man mentioned at the end of the last chapter recovered from his state of shock. His face was back stoic, barely showing any emotion at all as he walked up to everyone.

Denise, aside from everyone else, tensed up like a scared cat when she got a good look at the guy. Her eyes widened so much more than they should have, her breathing briefly ceased, and her heart began to race all the way from her chest down the streets. And this was no mere exaggeration, it seriously happened as soon as she held a brief gaze with those hazel eyes looking at her with such a fierce gleam burning into her soul.

Oh God, why was she suddenly burning up all over?

"Hello...you're all traveling together, I assume?" Ooooh, and he even had a particular accent with each word. Denise couldn't pinpoint where that would normally be heard, but that was what drove her insane both figuratively and literally.

Remember when it was said Denise didn't have to fall in love with anyone to live? ...Maybe that would be reconsidered a little. Maybe her new manga would become a shojo and she could include romance after meeting this strange, mysteriously attractive guy.

"Yes, we are all traveling together through this city." Temari stated, walking up to the young man. They both shook hands, Denise and Inner G could feel their blood boiling at this for two different reasons.

"I noticed that." The dude proceeded to eye everyone, boldly holding contact and succeeded in making them all uncomfortable. Denise, however, was full of glee. "Unusual characters. But it can't be helped in these times, I always see the weirdest faces coming and going. Forgive me for prying, but why does that girl wearing the black, sophisticated slut clothes have blue hair?"

"She dyes her hair blue for some reason beyond me!" Naruto yelled at the young man, but the stranger's stoic face remained indifferent as his eardrums got blasted with his voice.

"Regardless," The guy walked closer to Denise, intensely holding eye contact like it was the easiest thing in the world. The aspiring mangaka could feel her face burn hotly as he towered over her by a several inches (curse her shortness). "I think blue is a nice color, on you especially."

And that was when Denise giggled like a schoolgirl and turned around sharply on her heel, burying her bright red face in her hands. The dude merely knitted his brows together, confused as to this and questioning himself if he said something wrong.

Naruto looked over at Denise, wearing a look of disapproval. He knew her reaction, he had seen it all the time when girls fawned over Sasuke back in his home village in the Ninja World. And he didn't want his friend to randomly get a crush on someone she didn't even know. That would send her into a world of heartbreak.

The un-named guy straightened up and Naruto, Yumi, and Inner G fanned Denise's impossibly red and burning face with soccer magazines and a Fruits Basket volume. Until, of course, Gaara realized he had revealed his latest volume of that and was quick to turn on his heels back to the RV to put it back.

"My name is Andries. I assume you need some gasoline?"

"Correct. Our RV is, ahem, not really from this _time period _per see." Temari laughed nervously, hoping he wouldn't catch onto the fact they were from another land far far away. The purpose of this road trip was to escape that. "You may find it unsual compared to most."

Andries shook his head. "I see a lot of foreign vehicles coming and going, I highly doubt yours will be any less strange then theirs."

Kankuro got interested. He randomly slid up at Andries' side and bothered to ask, "What kind of vehicles?"

"Mercedes with two wheels and a hot pink tailgate, a golf cart/SUV combination that could go up to ninety MPH, Chinese bandwagons full of fruits and vegetables and an old bald man who was sleeping inside against the driver's knowledge, and a caravan that was bright green with angel and religious decals driven by a twenty-one year old girl wearing Gothic Lolita clothing...and that is only the beginning. Things went downhill from there."

"You can handle this." Temari and Kankuro announced with deadpan monotones. Andries nodded, accepting their response, and he began to make his way over to the RV try and fill it up.

Everyone else decided that they would go into the gas station and look around, courtesy of Kankuro's hunger for some junk food (Mrs. Haruna's constant healthy ways were killing him, ironically) and Inner G and maybe Gaara wanting to see the sights of this part of the Modern World. Better see it all before going back, the two assumed.

Denise and Temari decided to stay with Andries while he filled up the RV with gasoline. Although Temari did freak out and go on a rant about the _borderline _when Inner G flirtatiously walked up to her and mentioned with fleeting hostility directed at the guy whom didn't have any interest in his possible love interest. Gaara and Yumi combined managed to drag him back with them.

Now that they were alone near the pumps with Andries working to fill it up, Temari finally found herself a little awkward with the aspiring mangaka alone. Due to her apparent long-term memory loss, she doubted if the girl remembered their encounter that night when Salamander attacked courtesy of the late Madame Star. Denise wanted to turn over a new leaf, she was fine with that. But she felt awkward alone with her now, so unlike the first time they met at East Ville and she was oh so casual.

Hesitating, Temari finally turned to Denise and caught her attention. She quickly asked, "Denise, can I ask a question?"

"Whatever you like, Temari." The blue-haired (not naturally, thank God) mangaka dreamily said as she locked her eyes back on Andries.  
>"What will your manga series be about? Once it gets published and even created, of course..."<p>

For the longest amount of seconds, Denise's green eyes locked on Andries. Sparkling with captivation. But once Temari waved a hand in her face, she snapped out of the dreamy trance and composed herself back to whatever normal was.

"Well...I can't remember what I originally wanted it to be about." Replied the obviously crushing girl. Temari noticed she was focused on Andries entirely, she wanted to face plant because of it. "As we speak, however, I'm envisioning a very weird and ridiculous series. Supposedly taking place in your typical high school setting, but then maybe it will turn out that the school and everything that happened was all in the head of a psychotic, male teenager whom is an outcast of the world and was so miserable and begging for a normal life outside of the walls of the mental institution...he created these fake, normal occurrences in his head along with a split personality that he imagines as an actual person that is alive and always by his side, the people watching him through clear windows daily think of him as even crazier because of this. It all goes insane from then on; this is just the summary."

Temari merely blinked repeatedly. Maybe one-hundred times as Denise smiled proudly at her idea for a manga. Obviously, she has been reading way too much dark and psychological thriller manga lately. Whatever happened to _Fruits Basket_?

The sound of random applause filled the silence. "Pardon the intrusion into the conversation, but that idea sounds amazing."

Both girls turned slowly to see Andries standing there clapping, although his naturally blank and void of emotion face was worn. So Temari wasn't sure if he was lying or being honest, but Denise was relishing the first compliment she had ever received of this idea.

"Y-you rea-really th-think it's amazing...?" Denise stammered, her tone raised more squeaky and startled as she spoke. Temari was very annoyed and plugged her ears, while all of the windows in the gas station shattered and Naruto could be heard asking Yumi if there was broken glass in his face.

Noticing her actions, Denise was quick to hang her head and peel her eyes away from those striking hazel ones setting her soul ablaze and murdering it, theoretically speaking. The embarrassment sneaking up on her for acting like a silly, lovestruck person. Maybe she was in the same league as Inner G (sorry, Inner G).

"On the contrary, it sounded great. Although, if I can make a suggestion," Andries offered a fleeting chuckle. Which really wasn't much of a chuckle on normal levels. It was almost dry and with no amusement. "It's best to develop mental problems and develop a place in your head and another personality supposedly at your side BEFORE writing the manga. As I was always told back in literature classes: it is best to write what you know."

"Denise is already weird, she just hasn't realized it yet." Temari explained matter-of-factly once meeting those striking hazel eyes again. She was not intimidated by his intense eye contact because of always being at Gaara's side when he was bloodthirsty. "Besides, the premise seems too difficult to write out. And psychotic break downs are always difficult to draw in those tiny panels, maybe she should stick with shojo...magical girl crap and things of that affect."

"I took one look at Denise – is that her name – and I knew she would make an excellent mangaka. I, myself, am quite the closet anime fan...and I have done a lot of research on writing and anime in general. She may be able to pull off such a complicated series, although maybe it would be best for her first to be a short and sweet shojo-style series."

Temari rolled her eyes. "Thanks for your humble opinion, Andries, but we won't be needing-"

Finally, to prevent any hostility from erupting between Temari and Andries, Denise interjected. "H-hey, I think Andries' opinion was helpful for me, Temari! I do want to write a psychological, crazy series...but some of the greatest mangaka have struggled and wrote total bull in the process when trying to do what they WANTED instead of what their ABILITIES were!"

"How would you know?"

"IT'S A THEORY, okay? Who says I have to be accurate with everything? I hate know-it-alls and I don't want to go there."

"You just don't want to because the author will put you on a bus again, or take out of the story entirely."

"YOU BROKE THE FOURTH WALL...!"

Andries sighed, listening to the both of them ramble. Why did everyone he meet have to be so weird? Was he the only sane man in this Modern World? Well, probably not, because this is all coming from the same guy whom has a fetish for gothic loli girls and loves to dance like a maniac in his room to _Journey _music. So he can't possibly be sane. Man, Naruto would love this guy if he knew those two deep, dark secrets of his.

**.**

**MEANWHILE**

"So, what will it be?" The attractive young woman asked at the counter inside of the gas station. She looked about seventeen and had strawberry blonde hair in a pixie cut, pale gray eyes, and wore a maroon apron over a sweatshirt and knee-length shorts. Kankuro was distracted by her greatly as he leaned against the counter. "...Um...hello? You paying for all of that? Sir? ARE YOU AWAKE?"

"FOR GOD'S SAKE," A frustrated Naruto standing alongside Kankuro was quick to swipe all of the various kinds of junk food he had in his arms and dumped all of it on the counter before the pretty girl. "He's paying for all of this, he's just distracted by you because you're totally hot!"

"I'm hot?" The girl asked with much shock, her mouth fell open afterward. As this was the first time anyone had EVER complimented her looks. She used to be very overweight and had a problem with acne, so she never once believed of herself to be attractive. Maybe that new diet really did the trick. "O-oh...um..." She suddenly reverted to being very timid, she turned bright red and tugged at her apron. "Nobody's ever said that to me. I used to be alarmingly fat for most of my life, my face and arms – especially my thighs looked as if they were inflated...and then I turned over a new leaf and went on a diet with plenty of trips to the nearby gym. I never once imagined people would compliment me like this..."

"Hey, it's completely true. Naruto doesn't lie and I know that from experience," The girl's blush faded and she seemed to be gathering her confidence back. But she wasn't even looking at Kankuro, her eyes were locked on Naruto. "So, babe, I don't have enough money to pay for all of this...how about an exception? I pay with me taking you out for a quick-"

The girl, whatever her unimportant name was, suddenly leaned over the large pile of junk food and smiled dreamily as she pulled Naruto by his cheeks closer to her. "You are so sweet for saying that~! Tell you what, I'll let you take all of this for free...and maybe we could get together sometime and go to my bedroom."  
>"Why...your bedroom?" Naruto asked in confusion. He knew that it was usually guys who invite girls to their rooms, so when a girl makes that suggestion to the guy...that could mean something totally different. However, Kankuro, and an eavesdropping Mr. Haruna and Yumi in the corner "looking" at sunglasses and key chains all facepalmed and or fell to the ground in a heap.<p>

The flattered girl's dreamy smile increased for a moment, as she batted her eyelashes and replied, "Because my uncle, who owns this gas station, also has our house connected via that door over there to this place. If you haven't noticed when your sexy self walked in with your friends. We can go to my room, get nice and cozy, turn off the lights and lock the door, and study anatomy the up close and personal way..."

"I already took that class back home when I was studying at the academy." Naruto deadpanned, as if this girl was the most stupid person he had ever been subjected to listen to. And the girl merely facepalmed with one hand, while Kankuro, Yumi, and Mr. Haruna began to feel like throwing themselves out those windows hoping to get broken glass stuck in themselves.

Elsewhere in the little store-thing...Gaara and Mrs. Haruna looked at each other with blank expressions while Inner G stood and stared in awe at the selection of sodas. More specifically, his eyes were glued to the loads and loads of Mountain Dew sitting there, teasing him, _calling him closer_. So he could that one _first sip_.

Which leads to hundreds of sips, before he is going crazy from the sugar rush. Why else do you think he was almost always so spazzy in his various inserts in this story?

"You know, _Engery_-"

"I-N-N-E-R G, DAMN IT!"

"I happen to have a few dollars I had been hiding from everyone." Mrs. Haruna looked at the floor, very guilty as a stunned Gaara and Inner G stared at her. "I'm sorry for doing so, I didn't want Kankuro to steal it to pay for junk food. Or Yumi to buy Phoenix Wright merchandise from the internet. Or Temari to use it for polish for her fan."

"Are 'ya...are 'ya suggesting that 'ya are going to buy Mountain Dew for meh...?" Inner G asked in awe, now completely choked up as he turned sharply to Mrs. Haruna.

"Are you seriously suggesting you'll give him Mountain Dew?" Gaara managed to ask in shock, also looking at Mrs. Haruna. He couldn't believe this, wasn't it obvious that he was already high off sugar enough? "How do you think he became such an addict for it? Besides, Mountain Dew is loaded with sugar and it could cause kidney failure or diabetes...or something..."

"Please, meh man, I am 'ya inner." Inner G scoffed, crossing his arms and looking away. "'Ya have already...unfortunately...seen meh true form. Maybe this human body that sorceress bitch gave meh seems normal...but it's almost completely immortal. These...kidneys? Will last a long time, at least until I give mehself up and return to the other side until my next reincarnation is ready."

"So...should I pay for Mountain Dew or not?" Asked Mrs. Haruna almost tauntingly as she dangled the cash between two fingers. It was almost cute to see Inner G gasp at this and pitifully reach for the US currency hanging on the edge of a theoretical cliff.

Because, contrary to possible belief, there were no cliffs as far as the eye could see. Which makes you wonder what the hell that was when Gaara and Kankuro fell head first with the RV off a cliff whilst trying to outrun the man. Wait, is common sense even needed here...?

**.**

**MEANWHILE AGAIN IN SEMI-RELEVANCE**

A figure not so quietly and secretly sneaked up the siblings' and friends' RV parked near the gas pumps. This figure had long and dirty orange hair that was full of twigs and leaves, brown eyes finally looking less bloodshot from a power nap, and really pale skin. This girl wore a rather unappealing and unflattering green tank top covered by a brown vest, inappropriately small denim shorts, and long white socks and shinobi sandals covered with mud (they were originally an olive green, before she had to trek through mud). And yes, this was Iris. The Fail Girl stalking the friends and trying with no success to get revenge on the Harunas.

What kind of plan does she have up her sleeve this time? Let us find out...in the next chapter.

…

…

…

Kidding. Anyway, Iris not-so-quietly sneaked up to the RV and she thought she was doing it pretty good due to wearing civilian clothing and making sure not to wear her forehead protector again. That would have given her away, and she wasn't THAT stupid, right?

Akatsuki the lizard was still resting atop her shoulder basking in the sunlight. It really was a wonderful day, the sun rays gave off such warmth and-

"Here we are, Akatsuki! That RV is what those evil murderers are traveling in!" Iris basically yelled in triumph. It caused Andries and Temari, and Denise at the pumps to all ask together what that was.

The orange-haired girl was quick to gasp and smack both hands across her big mouth before cowering behind the group of convenient bushes on the side of the road. If she could just cross without getting run over by a car, or get spotted due to her lack of good stealth abilities, she would be able to put her plan into action!

"Damn, what I don't understand is how we were able to make it all the way over here in thirty-five minutes!" Akatsuki mentioned, he looked over at Iris with much confusion. Can you blame the epic lizard? That truly didn't make sense because there was an alarmingly LONG DISTANCE.

Iris didn't bother to try and put common sense into the story. She brushed the lizard, which she hated so much, off and then crawled out from the bushes. She assumed a stealthy position, and was quick to make a soft mad dash towards the vehicle.

"Hello there." Iris immediately jumped back upright and let out a horrified cry before turning around, and looking down at a cute ten year old girl standing there smiling. "My name is Twiggy."

"Get away, shoo," Iris hissed at the kid. Her brows furrowed and she just about wanted to scream in frustration when the little girl spun around and played with her short, black bangs over her forehead. "Hey, I don't like kids! Twiggy – or whatever your fucking name is – get out of here and go back to your parents!"

"...My parents left me behind." Twiggy mentioned sadly, her sweet smile faded into a depressed one as she looked at the ground. "We were, um, on a road trip- thing. And while on the way to North City, they dropped me off here for some reason I don't know."

"Listen, kid, they obviously didn't want to have anything to do with you."

"I gathered that. Daddy said something about wanting to drop me off and then go party without any responsibilities haunting him and making him sink farther into depression. And Mommy kept cutting her wrists while crying hysterically in an emo manner."

"So...let me get this straight." Akatsuki leaped from Iris' shoulder onto Twiggy's shoulder. The girl looked at him in amazement as he gazed into her big, innocent blue/gray eyes. "Your dad was a big jerk whom was depressed because of starting a family: he dropped off his own daughter on the side of the road and let his wife cut and end her life. And your mom: she was emo and wanted to end her life."

"Whoa~! You're a talking lizard~!" Cried Twiggy happily as she ignored what harsh reality the lizard had pointed out logically and grabbed his back and dropped in the palms of her hands painfully. "Lizards are so cool, even more so when they can talk!"

If he could, Akatsuki was sure that he would blush from all of these compliments. Iris rolled her eyes as she took notice of him basking in his short-lived glory. Before she snatched him out of the girl's hands and set him back on her own shoulder.

"So...are you _Lady Gaga_?" Iris could only stare and just about choke on her spit at hearing this. Akatsuki merely laughed himself into coughing fit – but it was worth it. "Can you sing that song, um, Bad Romance? I love that one!"

"I AM NOT _LADY GAGA_!" Iris thundered. It once again caught attention by Denise, whom merely shouted something along the lines of hating _Lady Gaga_'s song Telephone so much. "My hair happens to be NATURALLY orange and I'm pretty proud of it!"

"So you're the result of a mutation?"

That was when Iris' berserk button was pressed. Her biggest pet peeve of all was when someone bashed her not-so-glorious naturally neon orange hair. Iris reached for Twiggy's shirt and lowered herself to glare into those innocent eyes that reminded her so much of Yumi Haruna's. Those eyes that she despised and wanted to gouge out.

"Iris, she's just a kid! You can't possibly injure a kid and feel good about yourself!" Akatsuki shouted in a desperate attempt to stop his summoner from hating on a kid whom seemed to be dangerously innocent and not the least bit genre savvy about her situation. "This way sound awkward coming from me, but I just feel sick at the thought of child abuse!"

"I'm not her mother! Doesn't count as child abuse when you're not even related to them!"

"Iris, you know what I mean. Why don't you give her a break?" Akatsuki's green eyes slowly went up to a slightly backing away Twiggy and he smiled at her reassuringly. "Perhaps she could be of use to you. Seeing as though Twiggy doesn't have anywhere to go and no one to share the journey, why don't you let her tag along with us?"

Akatsuki always had to be the voice of reason, didn't he? Well, it wasn't so much as the way he was acting as her conscious...Iris was just pissed off that he mentioned "us" in his statement. In proper wording: it should be "you". Because Akatsuki had nothing to do with her, and vice versa.

There wasn't enough words to describe how much Iris despised the epic, voice of reason lizard from the underworld land of dragons. Or whatever that place was called, the orange-haired Mist nin couldn't remember. Although she didn't suffer from long-term memory loss like Denise.

In the end, Iris just decided to end this hopeless exchange. She didn't give a damn about Twiggy's situation nor did she ever believe she would. And Akatsuki's words of wisdom were giving her a migraine just like the kind Mrs. Haruna got ever time she saw the color purple.

This was wasting time, so Iris just hoisted both Akatsuki and Twiggy over to the RV. She pried open the door to the driver's seat immediately and climbed in with the both of them squealing protests which were very loud and it is illogical how Temari, Andries, and Denise could not overhear It considering they weren't too far away.

Iris had difficulty making it into the driver's seat, it took her about ten times to successfully get up there and it wasn't just because she's on the short side and fails at everything. She finally made it in. Twiggy and Akatsuki were both in the passenger seat and watching her fume about it, trying not to laugh themselves into a coma or something.

After a few seconds, Akatsuki crawled onto Twiggy's shoulder and the two of them exchanged curious looks before asking in unison: "Iris...how will you drive this RV without the keys?"

"Do you think I'm stupid?" Iris thought for a second after that comment. She quickly waved her hands back and forth and aborted that entirely, then reaching into her pocket and pulling out a familiar key that gleamed in the rightly-positioned sunlight. "Back in North City's shopping center, I had stolen this copy of the key from that fat puppet guy when he gave me back 'my little brother's stupid ball."

"You have a little brother?" Twiggy asked with a smile tugging at her lips. This caused Iris' eye to twitch repeatedly because she didn't even have a little brother in the first place and it was all a lie.

Iris ignored the kid, and she put the key into the ignition. It started up and made a rough vibration. It was a huge shock: Iris had screamed in terror and was thrown to the floorboard near the pedals, Twiggy cried out literally with tears running down her cheeks as she was thrown around violently and smacked into the passenger side window, and Akatsuki had luck on his side and was able to cling to the passenger seat and not get jerked about.

When the infamous vibration (made worse courtesy of Denise) subsided: Iris was upside down in the seat from where she had pulled herself back up, Twiggy was hugging the passenger seat for dear life still crying, and Akatsuki was just smiling like a retard because he was safe and sound.

"Oh...God...what was that?" Iris gasped once adjusting herself back to a normal position. Twiggy and Akatsuki were both just silent as they exchanged looks. She shrugged her shoulders and tried to forget about that horrible experience, and calmed herself.

The RV was running and ready to drive away now loaded with fuel. But Iris wasn't going anywhere. She started sweating and trembled pathetically before turning to her 'companions' and asking, "H-how do you drive a vehicle?"

Twiggy and Akatsuki both wanted to facepalm. But they didn't. They were more EXTREME and rather performed a shaky faceplant to the floor.

"Hey, stop face-planting!" Iris snapped at the two once they sat back upright. Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she looked back at the wheel her hands rested on. "At least I know how to put the key into the ignition even if it triggers earthquake-level vibrations. Anyway, cars and stuff are hard to come by in the Mist right now and we're a little behind compared to other villages..."

"I'm just a lizard from the underworld, 'ya can't expect me to be helpful about driving tips." Akatsuki stated matter-of-factly. Although he wished he could drive. His dream was once compete in those NASCAR things. A dream that he could never live...

"Oh! Oh! I know how driving works because I watched my daddy do it before he threw me out!" Twiggy piped up obnoxiously happily. One could only wonder how she could say this with a grin. "Do you want my help, Iris?"

"NO!" Iris scowled and took a look out the window at Temari, Andries, and Denise still talking. And then the rest of the group leaving the gas station. She once again started to sweat, and would probably need a shower after this was over. "D-dammit, kid, how does one drive a car...?"

"First, you put both hands securely on the wheel. It's used for steering, and driving with one hand or none is illegal in this part of the world, fact." Iris swallowed and gripped the steering wheel with sweaty palms. Ew. "Those pedals at the bottom are for moving and the breaks. See those pedals right there? Put there feet on them and push forward. And, those things over there are the needles that show you things like your speed and gas. But all you need to do is steer and accelerate now! Hurry, _Ichigo __Kurosaki_!"

"MY NAME IS NOT ICHIGO KUROSAKI, YOU DAMN BRAT!"

"Haha...I know...but your hair reminds me so much of him-"

"I'LL MURDER YOU...! If you dare compare me to any other fictional and or real life people!"

"Iris, you can't murder a kid! That's illegal in this part of the world! Why do you think her parents dumped her out of the car rather than murdering her on the spot with her emo mom's razor collection?"

**.**

**AND BACK WITH THE GROUP**

Iris was speeding away at near the speed of light by the time Temari noticed after spending so much time throwing manga ideas around with Denise and Andries. She pointed and screamed: "RV THEFT! RV THEFT! SOMEONE IS DRVING AWAY IN OUR RV!"

By the time Andries and Denise turned around, the RV had already sped out from the gas station like bat out of hell and leaving them stranded with no transportation. Temari was pissed off and Andries forever frozen stoic face had faltered for a short moment in an expression that screamed: "What the hell just happened".

Denise had her own special and over the top reaction. She fell forward to her knees and pounded the ground with her fist, shouting, "**YOU STOLE OUR RV! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU TO HELL!**"

Everyone kinda, sorta, didn't expect that reaction from the usually happy go lucky and oblivious mangaka. Temari and Andries stared, while the rest of the group whom were bolting over were rightfully horrified.

"What does that mean?" Gaara asked once going over to Denise and grabbing a shoulder such as Andries did to help her up. He really didn't know where that quote came from and was curious.

"That was almost direct quote from an epic old movie." Andries noted, nodding with much approval at Denise's use of it. If she was blatantly aware of his approval and the way he was holding onto her shoulder tenderly, she probably would have blushed and fainted. "The name of the movie...doesn't come to mind at the moment. Perhaps it will later."

"Yeah, when you're out of the story and we never see you again." Mr. Haruna muttered quietly, the only to catch this was Yumi whom gasped and told him quickly to stop talking or else something bad would occur. Maybe it wasn't too late to save things from the wrath of the author.

"What will we do now?" Yumi shrieked, grabbing handfuls of her braided brown locks, Inner G looked over and silently commented that he hoped she wouldn't rip it out unrealistically easy. Gaara, meanwhile, had just performed a face plant in his mind. It should be noted Inner G performed it in it's full form because of this.

Everyone looked down at the inner with anime sweatdrops. As if they totally forgot about someone stealing their RV for a short period of time. Red-faced, Inner G picked himself off the ground and kept his gaze locked on the ground rather intently.

No one didn't return to the main situation until Kankuro gasped. This succeeded in making everyone jump inches off the ground, utterly startled badly. They collectively snapped at him, but he just drowned them out with the declaration of:

"THAT FAIL GIRL, IRIS, SHE STOLE THE RV!"

Gaara blinked for about six seconds. Before shifting his attention to his freaking out brother whom he kind of wanted to label as a stranger right now. "How do you know it was Iris? She couldn't possibly be that obsessed with stalking the Harunas."

"Actually~" Mr. Haruna sang somewhat mockingly before shifting over to Gaara and laughing nervously. The awkwardness following up was too much. "That freaky girl will stop at nothing to being us down. We truly regret killing her entire family, but she won't get that through her head..."

"So she's going to follow us around for the rest of our lives..." Mrs. Haruna and Yumi finished together in deadpan monotones. Everyone was surprised they could pull them off okay enough. Although a monotone really wasn't becoming for Yumi, her original voice suited her well enough.

At least, this was what Inner G thought. And he thought this due to the fact his man developed this in his train of thought originally. Ah, the life of an inner...

"I could see the neon orange hair and her face!" Kankuro then proceeded to lean over to Mr. Haruna while grinning like a pervert. Truth be told, the former Sand nin didn't find it the least bit acceptable. "Come on, I couldn't forget an attractive face that easily...like how that chick in the gas station will always be seen in the back of mind despite the fact I still long for Hisako and that blondie already has the hots for Naruto."

"'Blondie' in the gas station happens to be my cousin." Andries piped up. His eyebrow twitched ever so slightly as it raised. Kankuro and Naruto both felt increasingly traumatized from the intensity of it all. "She should not be labeled as a stereotypical dumb or babe American blond from Valleygirl Land. Nor should she ever dare to come onto someone who looks as goofy as that trembling one next to you."

"I-I just thought she was going to look up anatomy on Wikipedia with me to substitute studying from a school text book and wanted to do it in her room to prevent her folks from getting the wrong idea..." Naruto squeaked out in a rather unmanly manner. He couldn't believe he did that, but he didn't care now as Andries' glare was burning into the very core of his soul.

"A-a-and I-I never said she was American! She sounds Dutch to me!"

"OH MY GOD!" Yumi randomly shrieked, she ran out from behind her mom and Denise and up to Andries. He towered over her, but she still looked up at him smiling and clasping her hands together like a tiny child who wanted his/her parents to buy something for him/her. "If that girl was your cousin...and you both have interesting accents in your speech...YOU MUST BE FROM THE NETHERLANDS! EEEEEHEEE!"

Andries didn't even blink, he wasn't the least bit fazed by the girly cry that only someone as quirky as Yumi could pull off without fail. Now, if Temari or Denise or someone like that tried to copy it...the two would only hopelessly be burned and owned.

And everyone forgot about Yumi's Netherlands proclamation, because it didn't matter, and returned to the main topic at hand. The one that was relevant to the plot. And this was: Iris(?) stealing their RV!

"Forgetting about Andries and his cousin's heritage, what do we do? We're stranded at a gas station and don't even know much about the area!" Naruto cried dramatically. Not literally tear up, just made a sharp sound. And why was everyone being so loud all of a sudden?

Mr. Haruna loved getting to hear again. However, he did not appreciate everyone always screaming at him when his hearing aid was switched on and working. Did they have no decency for a deaf man? Geez, young people these days...the next he knows: people will probably be giving him the middle finger and calling him a slow faggot if he drives below the speed limit! Ugh!

For the next several seconds, everyone exchanged looks. Wondering what they would do now...

**To Be Continued...Eventually...**

**.**

**Yikes, I know it's been awhile since last update. A lot of things have been going on and I just wasn't in the mood to write more of cracky comedy like this one. At least until I continued where it was left off and found myself back in the mood after finding some stuff somewhat funny. *Feels uplifted***

**Andries will come into the story a few more times. He will hopefully turn out as something of a love interest for Denise, but I'm still trying to figure out how the hell they could end up together. His cousin is a totally minor girl of the week character for Kankuro whom, by mistake, ended up liking Naruto. The whole anatomy dialogue made me cringe as to write it, but I still smirked wickedly afterward. And Twiggy (named by her parents because she was underweight at birth and still isn't very much at a healthy weight) will be hanging around with Iris and maybe Akatsuki for a few chapters. Serving as purpose as a conscious for the fail girl.**

**About Matsuri Baki's prank call...fail phone sex? I don't even... O.o Seriously...?**

**I hope I can update soon, but don't cross your fingers on VERY soon. The next chapter will be shorter, but I have to try and get to writing other chapters! Now, if you'll excuse me, I must get back to the other stories! Read and review in the meantime... *Leaves to go write new chapters***

**~MidnightSakuraBlossom**


	5. Stranded Survival

**How will the Sand Sibs (and the rest of the group) how are they going to enjoy the rest of the trip without their precious and beaten to death RV? And will Iris loose her sanity? So many questions, so little time!**

**Maybe Andries can help them out. He seems to be a cool, literally cool (as he's stoic) and all. Denise seems to think he's handsome and charming, but is she just fawning over him for no reason? Yeah, I didn't think that one all the way through. Andries and Denise MAY become a couple as the story goes on, as they will have interaction together until then. But what do you think? Please mention in your review whether you would like to see Andries and Denise together or not.**

**And anyway, enjoy the chapter!**

**Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto...then my name would be on the manga. And I would be famous. Do I seem to be mentioned on the manga OR famous world-wide? NO... TT_TT**

**-MidnightSakuraBlossom**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2**

**Chapter 46: Stranded Survival**

**.**

_Inner G's Log, page 1,_

_What's up? This is Inner Gaara (I prefer Inner G as it's more slang-ish and awesome)! This is the travel long of a inner that doesn't get much credit and gets his fair share of abuse! I started this travel log because I want to be able to look back on this awesome road trip meh current man is on with his freaky bro, beautiful goddess of a sis, cute but quirky girlfriend and her wacky parents, a Fox Boy and some Korean mangaka._

_I gotta say, to kick things off, this has been my funnest reincarnation yet. I've been a part of several, most of which were fucking epic failures! Made meh pissed off! But, in a twist of events, I managed to finally invoke a breakthrough to meh latest man – name's Gaara and this is where meh name originates. Anyway, being an inner for someone else is strange...but 'ya can't help but get used to life eventually especially when a magical bitch separates 'ya from the mind and beings you into reality with a hollow body and everythin'!_

_So many things have happened to be on this trip, but there's no damn way to write it all in this notebook! I managed to borrow this from a blonde chick at this gas station we were at yesterday. And so I can't fill it up with flashbacks. But I can, at best, describe what I am to 'ya!_

_Inners are beings whom live solely to be a push comes to shove thing for a person. And everyone has 'em whether they know it or not. We're like a voice in 'ya head that's what 'ya really are like deep, deeeep down inside a wall of facade and masquerades. I was one of the lucky ones to be able to be granted a body, and I look almost exactly like this guy except for spikier hair, pupils, and cat characteristics (seriously, I fucking lick meh own hands and arms clean after a rare meal)...! I think this magical bitch that gave meh the separated body had a thing for cats when she did that thing! It would explain this...well...at least I'm not like that freaky raccoon meh man originally had. That dude knew how to party, but he lacked good direction and turned 'em into a killing machine!_

_I like this body, I like seeing the world as if I was human too. Meh true form is...lacking, if you will. Yeah, see, it's this faded green light with only slight characteristics! The worst part of it all is we're stark naked constantly...and inside the mind of said man or woman...IN CHAINS. It makes meh feel like a rape victim in freakin' bondage! Damn...it's just...I...I know I may seem like I got it altogether, but I truthfully...'ya know...get shy about that. Everybody saw me in my true form when we fought some ugly-ass puppet that belonged to his brother, Kankuro. It's a long story. But the point is, I got the wind knocked out immediately after charging into battle and somehow, it was enough shock to remove meh from the body. God...I still blush and groan with embarrassment as to remember their eyes glued to meh as if I was a freak show! That's one thing, I doubt I'll ever get over._

_Maybe it wouldn't have felt TOO BAD if...meh man's sexy sis wasn't watching too. I could remember those teal eyes sparlin' like Mountain Dew widening as to see meh when all was said and done just moments before I returned to the body. I still feel uneasy around her, flustered. She saw meh in the worst possible state: exposed, powerless, weak, ect. Honestly, I just wanna crawl under the earth and DIE._

_The goddess hasn't brought it up since, but I wonder if she will. And...if she remembers clearly...is it possible she LIKED what she saw? Heh, if 'ya know what I mean. Yea, I guess I'm totally smitten-_

"What are you writing in that notebook, Inner G?"

Inner G was immediate in slamming the notebook shut and pressing a palm to it. The pen he used flung and fell into a piece of cherry pie Kankuro was eating at the kitchen table. His face lit up with a crimson shade as he noticed the Fox Boy himself leaning over his shoulder and curiously looking.

"H-hey, it's nothing! Just a stupid travel long to pass the time until we get our freaky RV back!" Inner G hissed somewhat defensively. Naruto was taken aback, but he remained quite curious at his actions.

"What's the point of a travel long anyway? We're all going to remember this 'epic' experience in the future if we ever can make progress and NOT BE TRAPPED IN THIS PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A HOUSE BEHIND A GODDAMN GAS STATION!"

"Geez, Fox Boy, 'ya yell too loudly and yet so epically!" Inner G said in pain, plugging his previously fucked up ears from the unnecessary yelling. Naruto was more or less outraged by the reality, but the inner seemed strangely cool with it. "Listen to meh, we just gotta remain positive we can combine our limited logic and find a breakthrough! That breakthrough is our ONLY chance of hope 'cuz I CAN'T STAND ANOTHER FUCKING MINUTE IN THIS HOUSE! I'VE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH THE OLD BASTARD'S RULES AND REGULATIONS, THE HOT BLONDE'S BIPOLAR ISSUES, AND ANDRIES BEING STUCK UP AND COLD TOWARDS **MY** LOVE INTEREST!"

Yelling unnecessarily loudly was a dumb idea in hindsight. As it was around seven AM and everyone else were still asleep besides these three. How did everyone get forced to huddle up in a pathetic excuse of a home with these weirdos (though they can't talk either)? Well, let's review.

The previous afternoon, everyone had to PUSH their RV towards a gas station in the middle of scenic nowhere for some of the aforementioned fuel. While at a rustic one, they encountered some interesting characters: Andries, Han, and Holly. Andries worked and also lived here with his uncle and cousin. Holly was his cousin, she has horrible self image and bipolar issues and also seems to have taken a creepy liking to Naruto (thank Kankuro for that). Han was the owner of the establishment and the father of Holly, the uncle of Andries. He was somewhat stoic but still was generous with his emotions compared to his nephew.

It turns out that the three live in a very small home connected with the gas station's convenience store. The place had a grand total of four bedrooms, one bathroom, a tiny study, a tasteless living room and a kitchen. Han obviously had been high when he agreed to live in such a place, with his own relatives no less! Well, it's not like the guy didn't seem like a drug addict already, Naruto had stumbled upon his secret stash of them including crack which the Harunas desperately pried their innocent daughter away from.

They all had to stay here temporarily as there was nowhere else now that someone stole their RV again. From what they understood, a Orihime wannabe complete with hair and uselessness somewhat highjacked the RV and rode away at the speed of light with two companions: a lizard with a natural epic face and a young girl who looked scruffy and untidy. God knows that looked awkward.

In the kitchen, Denise was sprawled out on a sleeping bag Holly loaned to her. Her dyed blue hair was going in every direction, her eyes were twitching, and the fact she was only wearing a thin white camisole and blue boy shorts, Naruto felt awkward to look her way because she almost looked like a – dare say – girl with a SLIGHT figure and even a fair-sized chest. He was STUNNED beyond all belief that his friend looked this way underneath that black, sophisticated slut garb the late Madame Star had forced her into. That was all she had to wear, Naruto wondered if it was washed yet...maybe he could steal the outfit to see her like this for an extended amount of time...

Finally, Denise' eyes snapped open and she sat up, reached for her nearby glasses before putting them back on, and groaned with disgust. She then said something about people yelling and about how the floor was comfortable up until a spider crawled over her thighs. Naruto didn't pay much attention really, he was busy smiling as he gazed out the window, wondering how the aspiring mangaka managed to look like a girl without the garb and yet looked so boyish with the garb even though it was clothes for girls anyway. Ah, logic!

"'Ya think we LIKE yelling?" Inner G asked with even more disgust then Denise. While she glared at him and gathered the sleeping bag from the floor, he sighed and tapped the pen at his travel log. "This whole setup is the worst thing ever! I couldn't find any Mountain Dew in this whole damn place and that fucking Andries wouldn't let me take any from the machines! I'm gonna have a mental breakdown if I have to stay here longer!"

"Well, don't forget your cleaver and a cute sailor hat when you do so." Came a refreshed and peppy female voice. Everyone turned to see Yumi enter the room, dressed in her ninja attire and letting her dark locks fall down her back out of the braided style. Everyone grimaced at her tone as a delayed reaction. "Haha~! Isn't it such a beautiful morning...?"

"You didn't get into any crack...did you?" Denise asked, folding her arms over her chest, the gathered and rolled up sleeping bag tucked underneath.

"No, unfortunately not. However, I slept like a log last night on the living room couch – it's like heaven in cushion form!" Yumi sighed happily, twirling around and sauntering over to the counter and swiping a slice of pineapple from a bowl containing more. "I dunno what you guys are grumpy about, that couch is the best highlight of this...unfortunate obstacle and I want to steal it if we ever get our RV back from _Katy Perry_."

"Sorry, Yumi, but I know the difference between _Katy Perry _and REGULAR people. And that chick with the orange hair was that hideous Iris, not her!" Kankuro corrected once walking over and snitching a slice of the juicy and ripe fruit from the container.

Ignoring that statement, Yumi decided to eat the fruit – her favorite to be exact. And with the way she smiled and swayed, Naruto, Inner G, Denise, and Kankuro all expected a ray of sunlight to blast around her and cheesy music to play from nowhere whilst birds hovered around. She was unusually peppy and smile-y after sleeping on that couch...when a lightbulb clicked on, they all made a mad dash for the living room possibly to fight over that couch.

Shrugging her shoulders, Yumi finished up the slice of pineapple. And reached for a second, she was glad Han was obsessed with them and kept the fruit stocked up. She felt as though someone understood her. Pineapples were all that was good and innocent left in the world in her mind, they dripped with sweet and slightly tangy juice and the taste was a punch to the face of delight!

While everyone else...were really bummed about the arrangements made, Yumi didn't complain as much as one would expect of her. They had only been staying here one day, she who knows where in this Modern World the Mist kunoichi whom is obsessed with killing her and her quirky parents could be with their vehicle. But she didn't mind because she was surrounded by friends, pineapples, and a couch so soft it couldn't be real. What more could someone want? Although she didn't like the color coordination of the kitchen: yellow walls, white tiled flooring, and brown counters with black appliances. That was icky.

Soon, Gaara emerged from whatever depth of hell he had fallen asleep in last night. He appeared tired, even more stoic than usual as if he was trying to warn others to get the fuck away from him, and his eyes were noticeably darker. The sight made Yumi cringe and drop the fourth...sixth...? piece of pineapple back in the container and dash over to him before he came any closer.

Looking majorly concerned, Yumi wrapped an arm around his shoulder to help him stay on his feet. "Gaara, are you okay? What happened to you?"

"That annoying, loudmouth inner I'm forced to put up with in my life."

"Uh...oh boy...not him again..."

Gaara freed himself from Yumi's hold, and leaned against one of the counters. As she looked him over with concern, he rubbed his eyes tiredly. "**IT**. Wouldn't shut up-"

"_**DON'T TALK ABOUT MEH LIKE I'M AN IGSIGNIFICANT PIECE OF PROPERTY IN THE CORNER COLLECTING DUST!**_" - This was Inner G's angry outburst through Gaara's mind, as he must have been listening through his thoughts again which matched what he was speaking of.

"-All he could tell me was the fact he was 'bored and couldn't fucking sleep', 'the carpet is way too soft and scruffy to sleep on', 'Mr. Haruna and Mrs. Haruna are cuddled up like a couple just married and it's making meh wanna puke', and 'your sexy sis keeps haunting meh mind, I probably shouldn't go sleep right no if she's there. Have 'ya ever experienced a wild and thrilling wet dream only to wake up and notice there's other people around?'. Frankly, I considered stuffing sand down his throat...but decided against it three seconds later."

"Poor thing," Yumi sighed and then embraced Gaara from the side, resting her head on his shoulders. She hoped he couldn't detect her disapproving smile, as she wanted the man and inner to get along. And after hearing his story that night... "I can't say I know how you feel – I slept GREAT! I feel refreshed full of overwhelming power from that cozy and heavenly couch!"

"Uh-huh, that's nice to know..."

"But I...I...I am worried you're not in any shape to go out with the rest of us and search for that orange-haired fail girl. I understand, and I want you to know I will stay here alongside you all day."

"Yumi, you don't have to."

"Please let me!"

"No."

"WHY NOT?"

"That sounds like something out of a lame Korean drama."

Somehow hearing that remark, a pissed Denise backed up like a construction truck or something of that effect. She was still in her underwear, but didn't seem fazed by that OR the fact she had a black eye from where Naruto had accidentally punched her in their fight for the couch. "I take offense to that, again! Those dramas are a thousand times better than crappy American Idol or stuff of that category!"

"Actually, she's kind of correct..." Yumi mumbled hesitantly, smiling with defeat.

**.**

**MEANWHILE**

Somewhere...there was a rather spastic and fail-ish orange-haired girl sitting in the back of the Sand Sibs' RV with a lizard that was forever labeled epic and a little dirty girl who was too happy and cheerful.

Quite the unlikely trio, but they were all together by the harsh ways of fate. Because of their run ins, now all they could do was sit here and wait for the very overwhelming traffic covering the streets to settle down so they could get going. This was what they got for parking the RV ON THE ROAD like an idiot at night before going to sleep. When they woke up, it was no surprise they were stuck in endless and violent traffic jams!

Someone had to spread some cheer. It was obvious Iris and Twiggy would not be providing it. Iris was being emo and sitting in the corner by the couch glaring at nothing in particular and brushing strands of her infamous and bizarrely natural hair, and Twiggy was smiling in the passenger seat playing Gaars's DS, she loved these _Phoenix Wright _games a lot. Akatsuki took it upon himself to provide the cheer...by singing...

"_MY ARMS AND LEGS ARE TIED UP!_

_I'M LIKE A MARIONATTE!_

_NO WAY IS THIS HAPPENING...!_

_WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?_

_TELL ME, TELL ME_

_WHO'S THE RULER?_

_DON'T TOUCH ME SO FAMILIARLY!_

_I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR HALF-TRUTHS ANY MORE!_

_FROM NOW ON I'M TAKING THE DECISIONS...!_"

Twiggy froze in her playing and looked behind the seat at the lizard behind them on a table singing his lungs(?) out from the instrumental and very inspirational music to the song playing on what was Naruto's MP3 player (he found this one, a crap ton of _Journey_ songs, the ending song to _Fruits Basket_, and even some _Shakira _songs). But this version of it was so blindingly epic and he already knew the lyrics, why not belt them out?

Iris just looked up at the lizard with an ice cold glare.

Finally, the time came to where he started singing it a second time. And at this point, Twiggy was really into it and stood up in the seat dancing and making a beat to the music, while Akatsuki really started rocking out by suddenly acquiring a random red vest that was tiny enough for him to wear, a tiny baseball cap turned backward of the same color, and some very small bling. So he just looked like a wannabe hip hop artist, but you get the point. He may have gotten the concept wrong, but he was doing the rocking out almost right.

"_...STAND UP! COME, EVERYONE, REACH OUT FOR LIBERTY!_

_NOW IS THE TIME TO ACT!_

_WAKE UP! COME, EVERYONE, STEP UP AND SHOUT_

_OH YES, WE ARE THE DREAMERS!_

_RUN FOR YOUR FREEDOM-_"

"SHUT THE HELL UP! I HATE THAT SONG!" Iris thundered, and actually, nobody really heard her. Twiggy was still rocking out and so was Akatsuki. So she threw a nearby laptop at the MP3 player and effectively crushed it and, well, destroyed it entirely.

The freaking awesomeness came to an end, as the child and lizard stared sadly at what remained of their fun. Iris was just a bitch and didn't like fun, apparently. She smiled smugly and then returned to looking emo as she brushed her abnormal and freaky hair.

**.**

**AND WITH THE GIRLS**

Time passed as the traveling group spent time at the gas station/home/their temporary residence until the RV could be recovered. Breakfast was eaten in relative silence (although Kankuro complained about the brand of jelly, Denise wouldn't stop babbling like a moron when Andries looked her way, and Inner G mentioned Gaara's thoughts of various topics like music and movies). Clothes (looking at YOU, Denise) were thrown on. And a small posse of three went out to search for the RV – and that happened to be Gaara, Naruto, Mr. Haruna and Kankuro.

The time was probably around twelve in the afternoon when the quartet left to search for their beloved and beaten vehicle. And while they were absent, Han dragged Andries with him back into the gas station shop and Inner G followed afterward hoping to dupe them into giving him Mountain Dew for free. And, also, he would play it cool but also full of a jealousy, when he asked the Dutch fool if he thought he could get on Temari's bad side and get away with it.

This left the females all alone. Mrs. Haruna, Yumi, Denise, Temari, and Holly were all bored and sat around in the living room doing zilch. Mrs. Haruna lied on the floor staring at the ceiling, Yumi lied with Holly in a fetal position on the couch from Heaven above, Temari stood in a corner kicking a beaten television to see if it would stop filling the screen with static, and Denise was upside down in a recliner reading the next-to-the-last volume of _Fruits Basket _despite having read it through and through only recently.

Creepily slow, the seconds went tick tock on the clock. But after listening to it this long, Temari wasn't about to have any of it. She ceased bothering to get the damned television to work, and stormed over to the very center of them room uttering a comment that hooked in everyone else:

"We are sitting around WASTING our valuable time! I don't know about any of you, but I think it's high time we turn this crappy situation around and make the most if it! Now, who's with me?"

Silence was all she was met with...until...Holly snapped and happily sprang over whilst cheering, "Preach it, sister! I hate wasting time!"

If Temari and Holly were that dedicated, then why couldn't they be? The mother, daughter, and soon to be mangaka looked at each other before shrugging their shoulders and standing to full height as well.

This was approved by the Sand kunoichi whom was fed up with all of their wasting time. She gave them all a smirk to signal this; soon she thought for more of an epic speech. But the one to beat her to this was Mrs. Haruna, whom proposed quite the appealing suggestion.

"I hate interrupting Temari, however, I know of a way we can all spend our time." The younger girls' eyes widened with delight and they crowded around Mrs. Haruna with fascination and suspense. The ex-Sand shinobi was intimidated by so many stares, but tried to seem cool. "Between missions back home in the Sand, when I was a teenager and long before I realized I was in love with Yumi's father (he was such a flirt at the time, I could never get him to stop trying to impress me or steal my unmentionables), I used to gather around in a room with my best girl friends. We would then just catch up with some gossip, maybe play games that randomly entered our minds, provide fashion advice, and even go to the guys and play pranks on them (mwahaha, I clearly remember that one involving stealing Yumi's father's clothes after he finished with a bath and leaving them half way across the village). "

"Oooo~! That sounds appealing!" Denise commented with a diabolical grin, something that one could say looked a lot like this: ';]' it caused Yumi, whom was the closet to her, to flinch and step away. "Mrs. Haruna, I never expected you to be the type of person to have fun between those missions you used to do back in that village place."

"Yeah, Mom, I never once believed you knew how to have fun..." Yumi also commented, smiling with approval and delight as she met her mother's eyes. She knew her mom liked to be a rebel and fangasm with _Dragon Ball _material and believed it to be a secret, but she never did know she was a real teenager back then.

And if only Yumi knew that one prank about stealing her later-father's clothes (everything that was in his room at the time) and leaving him with no choice but to go across the village naked to retrieve them. Only to encounter her and the girls chuckling and joking about the turn of events, the fact he actually DID IT was hilarious. Yeah, if she knew this, she would be shell-shocked her mom was like that.

And...she would have to remember to pull a prank like that before she died. She simply HAD TO.

"You know..." Temari nodded wisely whilst faking stroking an imaginary beard on her chin. "I like this idea. Mrs. Haruna, you're sometimes too much."

Mrs. Haruna liked having a compliment for a change of events. She stood up straight, eyes closing and a stupid childlike smile took up all room on her face. Now, looking at her, Temari realized where Yumi got that same smile from. It was her, no doubt.

**.**

**MEANWHILE WITH THE GUYS**

"THIS IS SO BORING!" Naruto yelled after much, much boring...ness...is that even a word? Well, anyway, he exclaimed his boredom to all as he crouched over the edge of a large bridge that overlooked the highway.

Naruto, Kankuro, Gaara, and Mr. Haruna were all actually crouched over the railing of the bridge each armed with super-mega-cool binoculars that Andries had loaned to them before they left the house/gas station. The guy was actually helpful in this way, because there would truly be no other way they could find the orange-haired fail girl and her two man posse of an abused lizard and even more abused kid.

They all hoped Iris and her posse would be passing this way. If they wanted to come back to the scene of the crime and fill up with some less then expensive fuel for the RV. And the four happened to be only a few miles away from the place itself. Yes, yes, that's very lazy of them. But it DID make sense (not like these several weeks have made any amount of since anyway).

"I should have brought meh travel long with meh." Inner G mentioned glumly, which was so unlike him in very way possible. In fact, seeing him like this freaked Gaara out. "Yumi's epic dad told meh it would be unnecessary."

"I can hear you, inner...what did you like to be called?"

"I-N-N-E-R G! And I swear, if you call me _Energy_ like your wife does, I'll-"

Naruto finally couldn't take any of this. He snapped. He plugged his ears and yelled, "Why can't you all shut up and let me be bored in peace! It doesn't freakin' matter what we call Inner G because Gaara claimed it to be true!"

And then, everybody shut up. For only ten minutes of their stalking antics above the less than busy streets which led to the man downtown. Shudder...bad memories of that...

But since this was so boring, someone had to be brave and speak up. Someone had to mention a way to kill some time because he could sense the girls were actually doing something appealing. Hmm...girls...obviously, the person to do this was Naruto.

It was no secret Naruto had a perverted streak that popped up occasionally. Right now, he was in the mood for some real men to men conversations. He slyly shifted towards Mr. Haruna and got his attention by nudging his shoulder with an elbow.

"Say, Mr. Haruna..." Naruto grinned foxily again, true to the nickname he been given by the loudmouth and Mountain Dew obsessed inner of his friend's. "Have you ever had an interesting love life aside from your wife? I've been curious for some time now because you seem so devoted to her."

This got attention from Kankuro and Inner G. Gaara still leaned overt he railing with much boredom as he took his phone and randomly started going through app selections.

Mr. Haruna was rightfully flustered by the sudden conversation pop up. He chuckled nervously and did his typical nervous gesture in which he scratched his cheek (aha! That's where Yumi got it from!). "Ah...it's times like these when I wish I forgot to turn on my hearing aid. Being deaf sometimes has it's perks."

"Come on, Mr. Haruna! Don't be a stick in the mud!" Kankuro pressed, shifting towards Naruto and mock-affectionately giving him a firm pat on the back. Naruto looked at him as if he made a wrong move which he kind of did because it was random. "Naruto's right, you probably weren't as innocent as you used to be as a teenager! Weren't there any hot chicks from the village you lusted after?"

Gaara officially did not want to be part of this moment. But he couldn't leave, Inner G would probably just track him down by going through his mind and forcing him to return. So he stuffed earbuds in and attached them into the MP3 player he just pulled out and blasted some _Three Days Grace _songs.

Apparently, Kankuro was correct. Suddenly, Mr. Haruna was looking almost the exact opposite of himself. His eyes were now narrowed, but gleaming with anything but innocence. He even acquired creepy small and square-shaped glasses from seemingly nowhere (actually: Inner G had borrowed them from Han the previous night because he thought they looked cool and he placed them over his nose for the occasion), and he looked smug underneath the hand he used to rest over his lips as he giggled evilly. He looked really ridiculous more than anything, but don't tell him that.

"Guys, all I can say is I wasn't always devoted to one woman. In fact, when I was a teenager, I was quite the flirt. I chased any girl whether they were slender, chubby, busty, flat-chested, pretty, plain, lacked fashion sense, had fashion sense, liked to dance, or preferred a quiet evening under the stars. And I have a history of makeout sessions in my bedroom."

Suddenly, Naruto interrupted by raising his hand like a student and asking, "Did any of the chicks ask to study anatomy in their rooms like Holly did to me?"

That statement suddenly made Kankuro feel depressed. He could remember trying to get that girl to like him, but she only seemed to have eyes for the fox boy and she still seemed obsessed with him and wanted him to get into her pants before they parted ways. Lucky bastard. Didn't he understand what the studying euphemism implied?

"Heh, let's just say we studied anatomy all night long until the bed gave out, the lucky girl was sore and bleeding, I was soaked and bruised, and the sun didn't bother to rise from fear of facing my wrath if it should dare stop me from having one heck of a 'study date'..." This statement got various reactions.

Kankuro's jaw felt too heavy and fell open, Inner G looked even more pale and was biting his nails, Naruto suddenly looked terrified as he caught on to the dirty implications now and felt so sorry for the girls this sex maniac broke down.

A brief beat went by. And then, Mr. Haruna finally couldn't hold in any longer. He tossed away the glasses, snorted and burst into hysterical laughter, and fell down to his knees.

The guys were just confused. They recovered from their various reactions of shock and awe from his raunchy tales. But what was this man trying to do? He just told them weird and shocking stories only to collapse into rolling on the floor laughing one's ass off kind of laughter? Effed up world-

"Guys, I made that last part up! I didn't have sexual encounters frequently!" Mr. Haruna assured once regaining his composure and standing back up. He held back some loose chuckles as he added, with an amused smile, "Yumi's mother was the one I waited for."

"You shouldn't lie, it's not fiar for us." Gaara pointed out, having removed his earbud in his left ear long enough to hear the part about Mr. Haruna 'studying anatomy' with several 'lucky girls'.

"Yes...but not when you're a married, devoted man who just wanted to have some fun."

"Good point."

"Say, what are you listening to?"

"Riot by _Three Days Grace_."

**.**

**AND WITH THE GIRLS (AGAIN)**

In Holly's girly-decorated bedroom, All of the girls were there chilling and admittedly not having a bad time. Seeing as though Holly had a huge wardrobe (which was weird, because her room was small and the furniture looked cheap as possible) and a lot of stylish clothes to choose from. And since she wanted to be friendly and also clean out her wardrobe of things she didn't like or couldn't wear anymore, she decided to have any article of clothing up for grabs. She debated having them pay a certain amount, but was awful with math so she didn't bother to do so.

Mrs. Haruna was getting carried away with surveying the room. She didn't like how the walls were dark purple (the worst color of all and the one she thought of as vile and terrifying), and the carpet was pink and fluffy. But she then got distracted from that and started going through manga volumes the girl had stocked up on two bookshelves (combing for _Dragon Ball _material in secret).

Temari lied on the stiff bed with a rubix cube. She had beaten it about thirty-nine times in only a few minutes, and decided to make her record a two-hundred. Honestly, one could only wonder what was her secret strategy to finding that damn thing out. Holly and Denise were nothing short of impressed and felt overly inferior and not worthy to be in her presence; which was TRUE IN FACT. But don't tell them that.

Yumi and Denise were going through the closet with glee and giggles. Even though Holly had the worst taste in room design, smelled like gasoline, and was annoying with the way she kept flirting with Naruto like he was a sex god, she did have one good quality that somewhat stood out: she had awesome taste in clothing. Right now, the two were degrading themselves for a moment to be shallow girly girls and beat each other to the fashions.

Holly, between all of this, was sitting on the floor near the door polishing her latest pair of hot pink high heels she bought with the money Andries payed her back from a bet a few years ago.

"Okay, be honest, how do these outfits look on us?"

Everyone looked towards the wardrobe to see Yumi and Denise emerge. Both wearing mixed clothing from Holly's clothing paradise as they dubbed it.

Denise wore a brown tank top that was slightly too big, a frilly and girly crimson skirt that reached to her knees with a brown square patterns, and her original tasteless black whore boots.

Yumi had to take advantage of the jewelry. She sported real silver earrings in the shape of hearts, a silver choker, and about three silver bracelets on each arm (jewelry fetish), a modest long-sleeved dark blue shirt that fell off the shoulders a little, a black and dark blue plaid tight pants, and violet sneakers (which clashed horribly with the rest, she wanted to take the dark purple pair but was afraid her mother would disapprove of the color).  
>"Six for effort." Temari muttered, still not letting her eyes wonder from the cube even slightly, fearing she may lose her streak. Although she did get a glimpse of Yumi after she grabbed her cheeks and forced her to look over.<p>

"Ten! Yumi, you look so beautiful!" Mrs. Haruna cried proudly, she then looked over to Denise and it all came to a crash as she frowned and shook her head. "I'm sorry Denise, five. You would look good if you still didn't wear those horrid, whore boots that woman forced you to wear."

"I think you're pretty stylish if not lacking. The both of you. So...seven." Holly admitted slowly as she was still somewhat unsure.

"Can we take anything we like? Including what we're wearing right now?" Yumi asked Holly curiously, praying to God in the meantime that she would get to take these clothes. They barely looked worn and she thought they complimented her. Though nothing much could be said for Denise.

Though this would be justified if Denise's supposed long-term memory loss prevented her form remembering her unique sense of style that everyone in this life possessed.

Imagine the surprise and joy written on the girls' faces when Holly gave them full permission. It would be shown just as this had two times in this story, but will not be now. Yumi and Denise proceeded to rampage through the wardrobe once again taking anything they liked and had dibs on.

They even FORCED Temari to go into the wardrobe and find some stuff. Though this meant she could not complete her record with the cube and forced her to stop at ninety-nine when she totally could have made it to the goal.

Mrs. Haruna and Holly chatted like girly girls in the meantime.

**.**

**AND WITH THE GUYS (AGAIN)**

"Isn't this awesome?" Kankuro asked his fellow guys whom were seated on the railing comfortably drinking bottles of root beer which they bought from a nearby convenience store. He was previously shocked to discover Naruto, Gaara, and Inner G didn't know what the hell root beer was unlike him and Mr. Haruna. "Aren't you guys glad you swallowed your pride and listened to me and Yumi's dad? This stuff makes the world go around and I couldn't imagine not having access!"

The slowly-realizing teens (or whatever Inner G was) didn't reply to that. They were too busy downing the root beer like it was water, actually amazed by their new discovery. The drink was totally a mystery before this epic moment, they thought Kankuro and Mr. Haruna finally lost it.

But it's addicting taste, carbonated texture, and the fact it was named after beer but didn't get them drunk won them over. Naruto was working on his third bottle, Gaara on the second, and Inner G on the tenth. Kankuro and Mr. Haruna had yet to down the first ones...yeah...

"I like how we can sit and chill when we're supposed to be busy searching for the RV." Mr. Haruna commented casually, he really wanted to shoot the breeze because no one else dared to yet. And the unfortunately suggestive moans Naruto made when he drank the root beer was freaking him out – he didn't wanna hear it. "Only...shouldn't we be drinking something alcoholic and get drunk so we can have true hazy fun?"

"The author probably wanted to have us drink because the rating would give the okay," Gaara stated casually before taking another swig of the root beer and continuing, "But she was probably drinking root beer while writing this and got the idea from there."

"NO! DON'T BREAK THE FOURTH WALL...!" Inner G yelled dramatically.

But it was far too late for them to be saved. Because of that breaking of the fourth wall, the bottle Gaara and Inner G's bottles of root beer slipped from their grasps and rolled down the street and off the other side of the bridge after a car smacked into them. A sad silence hung in the air until the glass shattering could be heard.

"Oh...damn...that could have made that hotshot's car fail." Naruto mentioned obliviously, having watched the whole scene but wrongly feeling bad for the driver of the hotshot Mercedes. Gaara and Inner G merely stared evilly in his direction which he tuned out to on purpose.

Maybe Naruto could be casual about it...but Inner G could not. He visibly became full of his typical rage and was willing to unleash some hell. Kind of like when he basically broke down the door to the home of that country hick back in the random wilderness of insanity. That, of course, being the unofficial name until Temari approved in his mind.

While Inner G cursed, fumed, and unleashed his feelings under his breath and looked pouty about the turn of events, Kankuro watched his unlike anyone else. For some reason, and he honestly hadn't the slightest idea how, he was concerned. Oh, he tried to tell himself countless times that this guy wasn't a part of his brother...maybe...but whatever he was, he was right now connected to Gaara SOMEHOW. He wasn't filled in on the details of this witchcraft, but he wanted to look out for his brother and ensure that nothing totally awful happened to him back in the ninja world and their very prolonged road trip to the modern world.

He believed it was because of that annoying elder sibling feeling over a younger. It was well known that an older child will probably become protective and whatnot overtime regardless of whether he/she is willing to accept it. And because Kankuro felt this way for Gaara, and Inner G was connected with Gaara, this...ugh...damn...shifted onto the inner too.

What could he do in this situation?

"Guys, let's go to that vending machine he didn't notice over there."

Everyone looked at each other, bemused from Kankuro's random order. They didn't know what to think of this. And it wasn't until he added in the details – that stated he was going to let his brother and the crazy inner get into Mountain Dew. Inner G was thrilled to no end over this, and Gaara silently approved because he had been secretly craving the very sugary soda after hearing the inner's dramatic descriptions laced with love for the soda – it sounded appealing.

Mr. Haruna and Naruto were not hesitant in following, walking coolly with their heads risen and hands stuffed in pockets and their root beer bottles gripped. Hey, crowding around a vending machine they didn't notice before was ALWAYS more fascinating and fun than sitting on the railing of of highway-like area and trying to find an orange-haired chick and her posse. Besides, this R and R was really helping them.

**.**

**AND WITH THE GIRLS (AGAIN)**

"**LET GO OF ME! MRS. HARUNA, YUMI, DENISE, HOLLY, FREE ME RIGHT NOW! AH!**"

This, and much more things that were too vulgar for the weak, could be heard from the bedroom of Holly. And if you don't know the details; the girls decided to get together and be girls. Temari wasn't totally into the idea after she got in there and became bored whilst trying to break her rubix cube record. She got forced into an impromptu game of "let's dress up an unwilling Temari". As the victim whom didn't want to be girly-fied like they wanted to be.

Denise and Yumi both arranged it at first, Holly was lured into it after the latter told her she could be the one to pick out the jewelry, and Mrs. Haruna became a major part as the one to pin down their doll.

They all laughed playfully and assured the unstable Sand kunoichi that she would be beautiful when finished and that she was in capable hands.

...Denise, Yumi, Mrs. Haruna, and Holly are obviously NOT capable, keep in mind. And this was what made Temari even more enraged and doubtful. Besides, she has been told she was sexy enough as is.

After much rough and almost questionably intense dressing, applying of makeup, letting down hair, and accessorizing, Temari was finally ready.

The sudden girly girls backed away from their creation, all staring or gaping. Feeling speechless and stunned by what they had done. Honestly, they didn't expect this to happen. They also wondered if Temari would be satisfied by their more or less obnoxious actions.

Trying to contain her squeals of delight, a rather accomplished Mrs. Haruna released her death grip on a kicking and yelling Temari. Holly looked at Denise and tried to give her a high five, but Denise just stared at her awkwardly as if she was a stranger and she did not just have at least one accomplishment.

She left her hanging. And Yumi also left their not friend hanging, but only because she felt like being a troll at the moment.

Temari's hair was released from it's usual style, flowing neatly at her shoulders and decorated with sparkly silver clips, soft pink blush and lipstick adorned her face (Holly tried to apply mascara, but Temari managed to sink her teeth into her wrist and that thwarted her easily), and she was unhappily tugging at the soft pink and puffed short pink dress that reached her thighs and had slits along the back and some of her chest, to top everything off she had high white socks and gray heels.

The reason they did this was due to the fact Denise secretly wanted to see Temari dress up like that. Ever since first meeting, she believed she could rock a super girly outfit and it was secretly number two on her list of goals after creating a manga series (forgetting it until this point due to her memory loss problem). Denise took pictures and giggled like an idiot whilst trying with what limited strength she possessed to not be scared by her threats to rip her into pieces and eat them. Yumi wanted to do this because it seemed fun, and it was. The ex-Sand shinobi also wanted to get a little revenge for all of the times she annoyed her – even though she turned around and forgave them, she was still pissed.

"You've had your fun...now maybe you should **RELEASE ME NOW!**" Thundered Temari once she managed to jerk up a leg and smack Denise's camera out of her hands – though the device landed safe and sound on a pillow on the floor. The other females merely laughed. "DAMN IT, MRS. HARUNA! LET GO OF ME! IF YOU DON'T, YOU'RE ALL SO STRANDED WHEN WE GET THE RV BACK!"

...That threat worked. Denise blanched and smacked a hand onto her mouth, Yumi's legs weakened and she slowly lowered to her knees with a look of fear on her face, and Mrs. Haruna hastily untied the ropes that bound her torso to the spiny-chair she was captured inside of.

Now free, Temari jumped up from the chair with a dark, pissed aura practically emitted from her as the light bulb in the light on the ceiling fan inexplicably blew out and cast them in darkness.

It was like a horror movie, Mrs. Haruna huddled with her daughter and Holly as they backed up towards the bed to dodge her wrath. Denise, meanwhile, wasn't quite as scared as she had been as she folded her arms and examined Temari's pretty appearance.

This was giving her good inspiration for the main character's supposed love interest for her psychological thriller series she stated earlier to Andries. A heroine whom dressed cutely and is very attractive, but is just as fucked up in the head as the hero and lives in the room next door in a straightjacket so she won't go out and create a genocide of epic proportions again.

**.**

**BACK WITH THE- SCREW IT, YOU PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW**

At the vending machine, Inner G shakily extended his hand to open the can of Mountain Dew. Gaara already opened his own and was chilling, shooting the breeze with Naruto, Mr. Haruna, and Kankuro while he acted like he was trying to decipher a code that could mean either the rebirth or destruction of the world itself.

This went on for several seconds. Until Naruto pointed out: "I think he's having a difficult time opening that can. He's been at it for a full minute."

"Do I have to do something about it?" Gaara asked blandly after taking a long swig of the sugary soda. The other guys nodded together whilst wearing less than sympathetic smiles. It seemed they were equally relieved their inners were still in their heads and didn't have to worry with them.

Eyes shifted to look over at the struggling inner. Whom had trembling hands as he picked at the can's opening in a fail manner. Was he really that pathetic? Or has it just been so long since he last had sip of the one way ticket to diabetes?

Either way, Gaara gave in to the stares of mock sympathy and took a step closer to the inner whom hung his head in ultimate defeat.

Throwing his empty can expertly behind him in a nearby trashcan, Gaara then swiped the not open can from those trembling hands which reminded him so much of his own. "Are you stupid or something? Opening cans are as hard as breathing."

"He's right...!" Naruto agreed in the background, he was merely given blank stares for being random. But he took it all in stride and contently chugged the remains of his root beer.

"...Anyway, what if we managed to kidnap Iris and those other weirdos? Do you think we could torture them until they swear to leave us alone?" Kankuro randomly asked Mr. Haruna, trying to resume the earlier conversation."

Shaking his head with discouragement, Mr. Haruna replied, "I'm now against torture, Kankuro. Remember: me, my sweet wife, and Yumi are no longer ruthless and heartless ninja. Although...I can't say WE ever were ruthless or heartless...but you get the point?"

"Look, it's so easy." Gaara, again, mentioned flatly. Inner G's eyes were fixated on his hand pushing into a piece on the can which bent inward, and some clip-thingy was pulled in the process. Within seconds, it was open and placed into his hand again. "I guess we won't speak of this again? Or will this go in the travel log for us to witness later?"

"Look, it's not THAT EASY..." Inner G defended, hopelessly attempting to save face as he wildly waved the can and gestured to it. "It's not easy when 'ya have been locked up forever in ya' man's head with not much contact with the outside world until some freaky raccoon dude is finally outta the picture! Nobody can say I'm stupid for not knowing how to do this!"

Gaara wasn't convinced that the inner wasn't stupid. He had been trying to get used to him, but still wouldn't be able to. This guy was equally as annoying as Shukaku. And maybe he didn't turn him into a living gore fest, but that didn't mean he could readily welcome him with open arms. And despite Yumi's pleas for him to be understanding of his weird story she was told, he would be tough.

Like a child running to the tree on Christmas morning, Inner G's smile was broad and ready to shatter his face if he kept that up. It wasn't a smile Gaara as used to seeing on him, he took a step back in an edgy manner ready for the worst.

In a heartbeat, Inner G jerked the can to his mouth and began to chug it all down. Everyone had varying reactions: Gaara stared, Kankuro froze altogether not knowing how to react, Mr. Haruna was keeping the time to see if he could chug it all in one minute, while Naruto was cheering him on.

And passing people just walked and tried not to stare.

The clear, fizzy liquid drained from the can and into his mouth but some of it leaked and dripped to the ground. It was rather sloppy, the way he chugged his favorite soda, but finally, he composed himself and stood upright contently licking away the remains.

Now, the reactions were not varying. Everyone simply watched as the can was dropped to the ground, Inner G's foot stomped on it, and he kicked it into the street where a big ass open bed truck came by and took off. This way, he wouldn't be busted for littering. As that was an awful penalty in this world.

Blissfully unaware to the stares he was receiving, Inner G savored the taste of the sugary soda. His eyes fluttered to a close as he mentioned dreamily, "That was so delicious~!" All of a sudden, his head tilted to the side somewhat and his eyes snapped open; but his pupils enlarged and his facial expression distressed. "I'VE GOTTA GET MORE!"

Mr. Haruna slithered away, hoping to shrink into the earth to escape that scary scene. "B-but I didn't bring extra cash for us."

Inner G turned and glared at the shivering man, arms folded over his chest and his steps were slow and menacing. Kankuro and Naruto looked at each other, distressed, now he was really reminding them of Gaara.

But maybe he was worse...because Mr. Haruna's life began to flash before his eyes...

**.**

**~SNIPPETS OF MR. HARUNA'S LIFE~**

_A younger Mr. Haruna, whom was probably around twelve, leaned coolly against the stone wall of the academy. The desert winds were less vicious today, the sun was visible, and he recently got assigned to be on the same team as his crush. He was waiting for a certain quirky and funny prankster whom would be passing by so they could meet their new sensei._

_A younger Mrs. Haruna suddenly appeared, walking past humming a tune unknown to him. With her shoulder-length soft to the touch brown hair that required much effort to get that way, dark green eyes which shimmered when she thought of a new prank, and wearing that cute long brown battle kimono and her new forehead protector gleaming as it rested on her forehead..._

_He almost couldn't help himself. The hormones just kicked in around her._

"_Good morning _." A younger Mr. Haruna greeted, trying to be casual. He really wanted to not say anything after that, his mouth has been getting all screwed up recently from puberty._

_Trying not to smirk at noticing his aggravation with being forced to talk, a younger Mrs. Haruna folded her hands behind her and put on a weak smile. "_, it's so nice to see you up early for once!"_

"_Today, there's no way I would sleep late! I hear our new sensei has a bad case of OCD and constantly makes sure everything in life is perfectly aligned...she'd kill me if she found out I arrived late..."_

"_Yeah, I haven't seen Daisuke anywhere however...you think he's already here?"_

"_Daisuke? Please, he's so lazy I doubt it! Don't see how you can call me a freeloader when he could sleep for years if you let him..."_

"_You're still far from dependable, _!" A younger Mrs. Haruna teased, leaning forward to give his shoulder a punch. It was meant to be friendly, A younger Mr. Haruna mildly flinched at the contact. "Why do you think I give you hell?"_

_Actually, it's more like Heaven if you're in it, was a younger Mr. Haruna's response in his head to that. He didn't dare say it aloud, he still wasn't sure if she felt the same way about him._

…

_Daisuke, twelve and half years old and totally lazy, sat underneath the three of the forest outskirts of the Leaf. Tall and lanky, chin-length flat and straight black hair, hazy pale brown eyes, and generally seen wearing an umber short sleeved shirt, gray pants, ninja sandals, and his headband around his neck backward. The guy had no sense of time, very tired and uncaring most of the time, a younger Mrs. Haruna knew from watching him in combat that he can be sharp, careful, and unsuspecting with the varying jutsu he had been forced to learn._

_A younger Mrs. Haruna sat near him alongside a younger Mr. Haruna too. They were supposed to be on a stealth-type mission to get information about plans of infiltration to other villages that were plotting evil things. Their sensei was inside the village posing as a drifter to obtain information via a rather ditzy guy ninja whom was told to show her around during her "stay"._

"_Any idea when Mitsuko Sensei will return?" Daisuke asked a younger Mr. Haruna, using that typical bland and slow tone of his._

"_No, she's been gone for an hour. Maybe it took her longer to get information from that guy than she anticipated..."_

"_Or she's too busy brushing her hair to make sure it looks good." A younger Mrs. Haruna cut in, the boys looked over at her as she sighed and gave herself a long facepalm. "I swear, I was visiting Sensei at her house recently to drop off some documents the Kazekage needed her to see...and she was standing at the mirror wearing a determined expression as she repeatedly brushed her hair."_

_Together, all three rookies hung their heads._

…

_Now that they were nearly sixteen, and any awkwardness and platonic-ness in their releationship had long passed, a younger Mr. Haruna was finally going to get his ass in gear! He was finally...he was finally going to tell a younger Mrs. Haruna how important she really was to him. How, for so long, he watched her and all he wanted was for her to feel the same way. But has been slacking on doing so because he noticed over the years...her and Daisuke got along rather well, the two were casual together and didn't even freak out a month ago when they were dared to pull each other into a long kiss by some of her girl friends._

_When asked of their relations, the two simply stated they were very good friends. And if any dramatic situation ever came around, they would gladly save a life even in risk of one. A younger Mr. Haruna was skeptical, but becoming less about it when a younger Mrs. Haruna started to loss her prankster reputation a little and started spending time with him more. In combat on the battlefield, she even saved his ass a few times which he was grateful for. Dare he assume, she was also noticeably shyer when they were alone together._

_Boldly walking down the street, rocking his chunin vest over his usual clothes, a younger Mr. Haruna knew that today would be a very memorable day in the future if Mountain Dew-aholic person or creature ever cornered him and his life flashed before his eyes._

_At this time of the day, a younger Mrs. Haruna had a shift at her grandpa's bookstore. Ever since her father was killed on a mission in an awful ambush, her mother whom was a civilian ran away and never returned fro some reason (it was believed she had dormant mental issues and finally surfaced), she just stayed with her grandparents and helped out at the bookstore._

_A younger Mrs. Haruna's fingers drummed against the counter as she waited for more customers. She had four recently, and one of them was Mitsuko Sensei whom shyly bout some more romance novels she was addicted to but her stoic personality wouldn't admit. The door slid open and the desert winds could be heard under the ding of a bell._

"_U-um...M-morning, _..." A younger Mr. Haruna greeted upon entering, he stepped in and closed the door back, a younger Mrs. Haruna smiled and gave a small wave._

"_What brings you over here today?" A younger Mrs. Haruna asked curiously, leaping off her feet and landed gracefully on an empty space of the counter. She sat there folding her hands in her lap as she waited for him...he seemed to to be stammering and turning quite red._

_Dear God, she hoped he wasn't here to buy porn magazines...she would have to slap him and then yell at her grandfather for letting such things be sold here when it books for all eyes._

"_..._?"_

"_Um..._...I...there's something I need to say, _." A younger Mr. Haruna began, walking closer to the counter. He tried to gather the courage, but his teammate's cute hair twirls and shimmering eyes distracted him greatly._

"_Yes, _?"_

"_A-a-ah..._," A younger Mr. Haruna reached outward and grasped her hand. She stared, mildly bewildered as she watched their hands come together. "Ever since that Valentine's Day when we were five years old, I've been...completely head over heels for you, _. It's been ten years today, quite a long time...you'd think I would have chased after the hot and popular girls back in the academy, huh? But I didn't."_

_A young Mrs. Haruna's eyes widened as she took all of this in. And if he was not looking through Hope Vision, her lips in a flat line were curving. She didn't fully smile, yet the implications still existed._

"_When you first pushed me into that sand dune, tricking me into thinking you were going to lean in for a kiss, I thought you were a jerk. Yeah. But still...I couldn't be mad by that trick, I actually felt admiration because I would have shied away. You could say the crush developed over time. And now...I want to ask if..."_

"_OH MY GOD, _!" A younger Mr. Haruna's eyes widened and he stiffened up with surprise after a younger Mrs. Haruna threw herself into his arms. "Grandma told me that Grandpa proposed to her this way~! That's soooo sweet of you to do~! My answer is 'yes', I've always liked you regardless of my actions!"_

_A younger Mr. Haruna couldn't complain to holding her in his arms and seeing her grin with delight. But he wondered...did she think he was proposing to her? Sure, he really did feel strongly...but he never considered..._

_Oh screw it. She returned his affections and she was okay with them getting married in the future. It was high time he dived head first into the moment without giving much of a damn._

"__, I would want to marry you someday."_

"_Me too! But...we're probably gonna have to wait a few years..." A younger Mrs. Haruna laughed nervously as she did her typical neck rub of nervousness. She didn't seem to find it awkward she was still in his arms romantically. "Grandpa and Grandma tell me they won't allow me to get married until I'm at least eighteen. Dunno why, the legal age in the village is thirteen anyway! Well, in any case," She blushed lightly as she nestled into the crook of his neck. "Get me a ring tomorrow and the engagement is official. If Daisuke or Mitsuko Sensei don't approve this, I'll rig their doors up with a bucket of filthy garbage..."_

"__..."_

"_Hahaha~ I'm kidding about the rigging! Or...am I?_

**~END OF SNIPPETS OF MR. HARUNA'S LIFE~**

**.**

"...So leave the memories alone, I don't want to see the way it is, as to how it used to be...leave the memories alone-"

Kankuro watched Mr. Haruna stand there like a complete idiot with his eyes closed as he sang some random song which would be fitting for the fact that his life was flashing before his eyes. But he kind of wondered...if all of that was necessary. God, he hoped it wasn't.

Inner G was finally standing very close to Mr. Haruna with quite the pissed expression over the fact he didn't have enough cash for him to get some more Mountain Dew. The awesome and Heavenly soda he DESIRED greatly. That stuff was a drug for him, and something he could never quit no matter what tried to interfere.

Coming to, Mr. Haruna's eyes opened back up and he immediately regretted letting that happen when he was staring into narrowing jade eyes with pupils that was shoved into his face.

Naruto, Kankuro, and Gaara were too freaked out to stop the inner from doing what they all thought he would do to the poor ex-Sand shinobi. And that was...murder. Then, oh the horror, they would have to be witnesses in court! But, if it did come to that point, Gaara would just pull a Phoenix Wright and pull evidence out of his ass to solve the situation.

"'Ya think 'ya can stand there and thwart meh from my soda..." Inner G's tone was strikingly different, everyone noticed. He sounded less carefree and wild, he actually sounded gruff and used a monotone. He raised his hand and made a fist as if to punch his lights out.

But then, randomly looking behind him, Naruto gasped and pointed rudely. "HEY GAARA, KANKURO, I SEE THE RV!"

Everyone dropped what they were doing, Mr. Haruna and Inner G included. The guys leaned over the railing and stared with amazement to see their RV driving...in reverse...whilst bumping around like when one of those vibrations occurred...and it was down on the street below!

**To Be Continued**

**.**

**Come on, people, let's see those reviews! I know I've been slacking on the updates, I'm very apologetic and you can strike me over the head with a bat if you must. T_T *Offers a baseball bat to you***

**The songs included were Freedom (used as a Naruto Shippuden ending, one of my personal favorites. I used the English lyric translation from an anime lyric website because I was too lazy to decipher it myself despite knowing Japanese), and Leave The Memories Alone (I believe it's the name? Correct me. The song itself is by Fuel).**

**See 'ya in the next chapter! Read and review!**

**-MidnightSakuraBlossom**


	6. The Chapter With No Fitting Title!

***Crickets fill the silence, I take a deep breath and shakily enter the scene* Um...hello...how's it going, everyone? Miss me? Want to see where this crazy fic will go next?**

**This chapter would have been published so much sooner, if StormofyourDestiny did not accidentally delete it (it was on her laptop and she had been moving old and non-important documents into the trash) and I lost motivation to write the entire thing again. But I won't hold that against her, mostly because this concept could be used as a "that's what she said" joke.**

**I have a question after the chapter, please give me your thoughts on that, okay?**

**Disclaimer: Naruto will never belong to me, I don't know why I even bother hoping for that. -_-**

**-MidnightSakuraBlossom, your favorite(?) rather late publisher**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip 2**

**Chapter 47: The Chapter With No Fitting Title!**

**.**

**PREVIOUSLY WITH THE SAND SIBS**

_In the kitchen, Denise was sprawled out on a sleeping bag Holly loaned to her. Her dyed blue hair was going in every direction, her eyes were twitching, and the fact she was only wearing a thin white camisole and blue boy shorts, Naruto felt awkward to look her way because she almost looked like a – dare say – girl with a SLIGHT figure and even a fair-sized chest. He was STUNNED beyond all belief that his friend looked this way underneath that black, sophisticated slut garb the late Madame Star had forced her into. That was all she had to wear, Naruto wondered if it was washed yet...maybe he could steal the outfit to see her like this for an extended amount of time..._

* * *

><p><em>Finally, Denise' eyes snapped open and she sat up, reached for her nearby glasses before putting them back on, and groaned with disgust. She then said something about people yelling and about how the floor was comfortable up until a spider crawled over her thighs. Naruto didn't pay much attention really, he was busy smiling as he gazed out the window, wondering how the aspiring mangaka managed to look like a girl without the garb and yet looked so boyish with the garb even though it was clothes for girls anyway. Ah, logic!<em>

_"'Ya think we LIKE yelling?" Inner G asked with even more disgust then Denise._

* * *

><p><em>"I hate interrupting Temari, however, I know of a way we can all spend our time." The younger girls' eyes widened with delight and they crowded around Mrs. Haruna with fascination and suspense. The ex-Sand shinobi was intimidated by so many stares, but tried to seem cool. "Between missions back home in the Sand, when I was a teenager and long before I realized I was in love with Yumi's father (he was such a flirt at the time, I could never get him to stop trying to impress me or steal my unmentionables), I used to gather around in a room with my best girl friends. We would then just catch up with some gossip, maybe play games that randomly entered our minds, provide fashion advice, and even go to the guys and play pranks on them (mwahaha, I clearly remember that one involving stealing Yumi's father's clothes after he finished with a bath and leaving them half way across the village). "<em>

_"'Ya think 'ya can stand there and thwart meh from my soda..." Inner G's tone was strikingly different, everyone noticed. He sounded less carefree and wild, he actually sounded gruff and used a monotone. He raised his hand and made a fist as if to punch his lights out._

_But then, randomly looking behind him, Naruto gasped and pointed rudely. "HEY GAARA, KANKURO, I SEE THE RV!"_

_Everyone dropped what they were doing, Mr. Haruna and Inner G included. The guys leaned over the railing and stared with amazement to see their RV driving...in reverse..._

**CURRENTLY WITH THE SAND SIBS**

"That's definitely our RV!" Kankuro pointed out with glee over the situation. He promptly shoved Naruto and Mr. Haruna aside and began to bolt towards the driving in reverse RV hoping to stop it. Everyone stared with shock at this, not really expecting that move.

They were being logical and trying to yell at him to stop. Because Iris was even more of a retard than they all thought if she was driving the RV in reverse back to the scene of the crime, that was just ridiculous if not very convenient because the author of this story couldn't think of any other way to have this happen. Yes, that broke the fourth wall. Nothing will be done because the characters (Gaara) didn't say it.

"Is he suicidal?" Inner G asked with complete horror upon seeing Kankuro whip out his puppets from the bag he had been carrying all along on his shoulders and charge to the RV. He was utterly speechless, yes, even he was. He sputtered and then turned and grasped Gaara's shoulders like a madman. "I'm usually the one to go through with somethin' stupid, but that's RIDICULOUS! 'Ya can't simply dash towards an RV that's drivin' in reverse and hope to stop it! Unless you're in an episode of the _Simpsons _of course...so...yeah..."

"You obviously don't know what Kankuro can do," Gaara stated as calm as ever. As if no fucks were going to given about the situation which really wasn't all that dramatic as his inner made it out to be. He peeled off those hands from his shoulders and crossed his arms coolly. "He's going to scare the hell out of Iris, her lizard-thing, and that little girl by bursting into the RV with his puppets and give us a chance to provide the action in no less than two minutes. All we can do at this moment is remain calm and await for the RV to come near us."

"You sound too confident in him, Gaara!" Naruto said, panicked from where he sat on the railing and near the point of reaching for a nearby Mr. Haruna's hand and biting his nails. Which...ew...is actually kind of unsettling if you think about it. "Are you talking about the same dude who brought that revenge-obsessed puppet along on this road trip? The same dude who would bang Kagome Higurashi from _Inuyasha _if she was real? The same dude who-"

"Cut to the chase!" Inner G yelled randomly.

"Naruto, I know he's been really obnoxious over this trip...but...he's my brother and I need to learn to live with him eventually. Do I have a choice?" Naruto and Inner G looked at each other, unable to say anything because they have just been owned. Gaara overlooked the railing at the backward RV and listening to the sounds of Kankuro and his puppets infiltrating the vehicle. "Maybe he can do something. And...if not...we just call the road trip over and return back to the ninja world on Temari's fan."

Inner G, Naruto, and Mr. Haruna looked at each other. As if they were all expectant of someone to make a move and provide help. But in the end...they all said in harmony that they were thirsty and bolted over to the drink machine, far away from the scene.

Seeing as though he was alone, Gaara rolled his eyes and advanced toward the RV.

**.**

**MEANWHILE ELSEWHERE**

Andries finished filling up the latest customer's car. Oh, he couldn't remember his face exactly but he had come in with some kind of old-fashioned Mercedes and the trunk was stocked with precious gemstones. He didn't question the guy, but he couldn't help but get a glimpse of it when he lifted it for just a moment to retrieve his wallet.

Geez, it seemed like he got the weirdest customers. If his uncle wasn't careful, they could be robbed blind or perhaps in even more danger. Like some kind of worldwide criminal affair shit could occur. Hank was much too careless for his own good. And Holly? She was too much of an airhead to know whether the convince store had white tiled floors or orange.

…And the tiles were both orange and white. But Holly once burst out laughing after walking in while they were being placed on the floor, and when asked what was so funny – her reply was that the _purple _and _maroon _tiles clashed horribly and it was funny. Um...

Anyway, Andries began to walk back to the convenience store when he began to think about something. The topic of Denise and her obsession with creating a manga arose with some ideas she could use for a plot following after. He couldn't help that he found her charming for her quirky obsession and she was kind of cute if you tilted your head and perhaps overlooked her chubby legs and stomach. Maybe that was what she got for playing too many card games and not exercising.

Anyway, a lot of the ideas seemed like they could work. In his mind, at least. But it's not like Andries was totally inept here, as he was familiar with great writing and has a read a grand total of two-hundred fifty-five long books in his lifetime and that's not even counting the manga volumes. He thought he could at least be of some help.

It's just too bad, he thought once pulling the handle of the door and entering, Denise would leave with the rest of her companions as soon as they tracked down the once-again-stolen RV.

**.**

**AND BACK TO THE ACTION...**

From the inside of the RV, really loud yelling could be heard. It was Iris scolding Akatsuki and Twiggy at the top of her lungs for using their combined lack of logic to drive the RV out of the heavy traffic. It turns out that they decided to be stupid and drive it in reverse back to square one. Seriously, those three actually make quite the trio because they're all basically idiots. We should call them..._The Idiots_...

_The Idiots _were all fussing about the situation, and then Twiggy became so childishly angry that she took the key out all together and shut off the RV. Now it was stuck frozen, and Akatsuki and Iris lunged onto her to try and get the keys. But the kid had to fight back and was running all over the place.

This was Kankuro's chance to slip in, he noticed whilst watching through the windows like a stalker at all of the violence and action that took place in the RV. One may say he looked like a stalker at that point. But that one would be correct, so it doesn't matter.

"_So all I gotta do is slip through the door and put my strategy in order: grab Akatsuki and use the lizard-thing as a hostage, the gross-looking kid they're chasing obviously is fond of him and would try to help. But when she does that, she'll be held hostage too. The fail chick won't be able to put up a fight, and I release the hostages for her. I think there's some rope in the kitchen in case of emergency, I can tie her up and..._" Other thoughts began to formulate in Kankuro's head. Thoughts that will not be added for the sake of your sanity. He soon shook his head, clearing them, and tried to forget it entirely as he grabbed his wrapped puppets from his back and unveiled them. "_...Not in a bondage-type way or something. Ew, she's stupid AND she tried to kill us. Must remember that. Anyway, I think if I just stick with the hasty strategy, it shouldn't be hard to get the RV back and pick up the rest of the guys._"

Within a few seconds, Kankuro had epically unveiled a second version of Karasu (worked on it while at North City and a few moments on the road just before they had broken down and stayed with those freaky people. It looked like the original, had it's abilities and some extra stuff), and he decided he had no choice but to use Sasori as well. After all, it was time he get some action in this story.

And now, it was time to kick some ass.

Okay, well, that's what Kankuro thought would happen. But before that happened, he noticed a rather unusual wave of sand approach him, and soon he fully noticed Gaara standing there with a look in his eyes that basically screamed he was ready to kick some ass too.

Putting all of this together, Kankuro realized why Gaara was here. But he couldn't complain. He would probably need help, someone would need to hold Iris and Akatsuki back while he locked the kid in the bathroom or threw her out of the window.

**.**

"I! HATE! YOU! SO! MUCH! YOU DAMN, WORTHLESS LIZARD!" Iris hollered like a complete lunatic as she repeatedly stomped a foot onto a protesting Akatsuki whom she had thrown on the floor in the back of the RV when she finally took notice of the way he helped Twiggy drive the RV in reverse like they were morons. Fire burned in her eyes, she pummeled the crap out of the lizard (not really that epically, after all, she is a failure of a kunoichi and would get her ass handed to her in real combat). "YEAH, CRY OUT IN PAIN LIKE THE WUSS YOU ARE! I LOVE SEEING YOU SCREAM, IT WILL DO YOU SOME GOOD!"

Twiggy, whom had been sitting on the counter next to the small fridge and chomping on some spring salad with nuts and berries inside, looked up at Iris (not all that much) pummeling Akatsuki. Her big, too-curious-for-her-own-good eyes blinked with more of that childish curiosity. "Are you a sadist, miss Iris?"

That was when Iris froze up from attacking Akatsuki. Her foot came to a halt centimeters above the lizard's face and remained there as a wave of shock swerved. Her brown eyes widened comically and she promptly stormed over to the kid whom she couldn't stand just as much as the summon creature.

"A s-sadist?" Iris' pale cheeks promptly lit up with red as she whirled around to Twiggy angrily and grabbed her by her shoulders tensely. "You're just a kid! You shouldn't ask questions like that! Besides, a sadist is someone who takes pleasure in pain and I wouldn't really know because I've never been in a relationship before!"

Promptly, the back door to the RV was slid open at a rapid speed. There wasn't any sound but stomping and a soft bang as dark-colored lifeless body of some redheaded dude shoved itself through the opening and crashed into one of the walls...which failed to make the moment dramatic because that looked really stupid. The easily amused would probably laugh.

Iris, Twiggy, and Akatsuki all looked over at the opened doors and then the lifeless dude with threads of chakra running through his back, they promptly sweat-dropped as if they were inside a manga.

Promptly, Kankuro threw himself in and landed to his feet quite epically. He even topped this entrance off with a dramatic pose involving the pale-blue threads of chakra stretching from his fingers to the useless puppet body in a crumbled heap on the floor. And, a few seconds later, Gaara casually strolled in not bothering to strike an epic pose.

Iris noticed the two brothers before Akatsuki or Twiggy did. She realized they were very familiar, too familiar. She recalled previously fooling the puppet master dude after finding out he was friends with the Haruna bitches and trying to kill him. She remembered the younger, more composed dude being with the Harunas and co. before they went off to fight that revenge-obsessed puppet.

It was assumed that they would remember her. Well, they halfway did at least. Gaara pointed out after a terribly awkward silence, "Look, it's the Orihime-wannabe."

It was a good thing that Akatsuki and Twiggy were in the know of _Bleach_. Because after FINALLY taking notice of the comparison, the two of them looked at each other from the side and cracked goofy smiles as they snickered. Iris was nothing short of enraged, whipping her head to her unfortunate companions and giving them a cold glare for being amused. Damn, it wasn't her fault both her parents had red hair and that somehow led to hers being orange!

There was another awkward silence in the air, as no one really knew what to do know that they had encountered. Should they fight? Talk out their problems? Have some afternoon tea? They hadn't planned out anything beforehand, so it made this entire confrontation seemingly useless. But, it was far from useless, they NEEDED their RV back so they could say goodbye to those three freaks (not like they were any less of freaks than Han, Andries, and Holly, but you get the point)!

Yeah, about two minutes passed and no one did anything...okay, that's really stupid. But it's true. Everyone survived the dreaded awkward silence that long, and it kind of makes one wonder what Naruto, Inner G, and Mr. Haruna were doing during this time.

**.**

**WITH MR. HARUNA, INNER G, AND NARUTO MEANWHILE ELSEWHERE**

"Can you get a signal?" Mr. Haruna asked the rather exhausted Inner G whom was sitting on the railing over the intersection of whatever it was. Him and Naruto stood near leaning over his shoulders with bottles of root beer still in hand. "Can you get a signal? Signal? Signal? Signal?"

Mr. Haruna's repeating question of if Inner G could get into contact with his man began to go on and on like a damn mantra or something. He just wouldn't shut up, even though it was obvious the inner as encountering problems and was much too focused to be able to reply right away. And Naruto wasn't much help because he had turned his attention downing the root beer before it got warm.

"Signal? Signal? Signal? Signal yet? Do you have one? Hello, signal? Signal? Hello? How's that signal coming along? Hello? Signal?"

"**FOR THE LOVE OF GOD; SHUT UP!**" Inner G finally screamed, his eyes snapping open and revealing much rage. His overwhelming voice that only came out when he was angry wavered over the area and caused many passing cars to jump inches off of the road and Naruto to accidentally throw his bottle and then react dramatically to the loss of it.

Mr. Haruna was shocked that he was yelled at. He didn't think that he had done anything wrong, but then again, he doesn't recall all of those times he yelled so overwhelmingly loud that he almost made everyone else around him deaf. And who could forget the time he scared some kid named Cory and his mother back in North City? Temari couldn't...she was the only witness.

Inner G overlooked the traffic and the stationary RV of theirs before his eyes. Which narrowed slightly as he heard nothing but static in the back of his head, unable to communicate with his man. "I can't get any signal from that freaky RV! There must be such a large presence of fail going on in there that it's affecting meh man's mind so much – and I can't break through the barrier...DAMMIT!"  
>Inner G had a low patience level, apparently. He cautiously turned around back to his feet and began to walk out of the scene with his head hung low, he just couldn't do it. He couldn't be of any help for once by suggesting that his man do something freaky to Iris and her posse.<p>

Naruto noticed the inner's actions if disappointment and self pity. He couldn't say that he held any sympathy in that moment, mostly because he was still mourning for the loss of his root beer and even was going as to far as to wear Kankuro's hat over his head (because it was black like those hoods and veils old widows adorn for funerals) with no evidence pointing as to how he acquired it. But he did kind of wish that the inner of someone like GAARA wouldn't GIVE UP so easily.

Plus, as we all know, Naruto wasn't one to give up himself. And if anyone else did so...they could expect to him to move into the point of wanting to lecture them – as long as it made their asses get into gear and fix the problems going on!

"Are you really going to give up that easily?" Naruto asked in a lower, more serious tone compared to his usual as he followed after the inner. Inner G didn't respond, he merely continued to walk away down the sides of the highway like he was attempting to go die somewhere in pity. The fox boy was far from accepting of this and continued on at a furious walking pace. "You...you can't do that! We have to get into touch with Gaara, he and Kankuro may need backup from the RV-thieves!"

"Yeah, so?" Inner G retorted, finally stopping and turning to give Naruto a deadpan expression. Ah, now Naruto fully took in how much he acquired his friend's looks with this expression. "The thieves consist of a freaky Fail Girl, an epic lizard, and some scruffy and filthy kid. Do you really think they'll put much of a fight, Fox Boy?" Naruto still looked disagreeing, he folded his arms across his chest and gazed around as if to imply he was so disgusted he didn't want to look at him. He knew this infuriated the inner, whom gasped at the turn of events and then stomped a foot. "Are you trying to piss meh off or something? We can take this outside – 'cause we're ALREADY outside!"

"I'm just disgusted!" Naruto was quick to answer, raising his voice as well. Mr. Haruna watched from a fair distance away like an idiot not getting involved when back up was needed. The pissed jinchuriki took another step forward and threw his arms in the air and made crazy gestures as he went on angrily, "You're supposed to be Gaara's inner and offer suggestions and other crap like that, but when it comes to a situation that could easily pass into shockingly-serious territory because of the oddness of this fic, you totally give up and don't bother to try! If you ask ME, you're beginning to loose your epic-ness..."

"...I'm not as epic as I try to be."

Okay, that reply WASN'T what Naruto was expecting. He suddenly froze up, shocked beyond all belief that Inner G whom supposedly thinks of himself as haughty and epic (and not to mention prone to getting a big head like whenever Hisako would grant him a highly-respectable honorific and swoon over his epic-ness), would actually have a moment of clarity! Well, damn, he wasn't about to let this moment slip out of reach! It seems it would be satisfying to listen to someone admit their faults, so Naruto said nothing and gladly let Inner G go on to diss himself...

"I'm just a piece of matter that floats through the head of someone, telling 'em what to do or possibly grant enough power to take over them and let them do something they've secretly dreamed of forever. I'm no one if you think of it, 'cause meh time's up here, I'll probably be sent to some dude who doesn't have as much epic-ness as meh current man..." Inner G snapped, at the breaking point now after being tackled with his failure head on. He was glaring daggers at Naruto, just as Gaara would always do in the past when faced with a victim (ah, there's the resemblance again), and he just felt the need to shout and confess his flaws. Maybe it would be like some extreme therapy and help. "You've every reason to get disgusted with meh, I just can't seem to become as epic as all of the other inners planted in this world! At least THEY were able to have successful reincarnations when their man/woman's time had passed! It really sucks dick to be an inner because ya' hardly ever respected, 'ya get shunned out by the man/woman, and there are the _rare cases_ like meh whom are so _weak_ they sometimes can't get past a barrier of fail to get into contact or overtake the man/woman!"

Mr. Haruna was actually getting affected by all of this in the background, not really. He wasn't emotional at all, he wanted to be sarcastic. He had quietly snitched Kankuro's small violin before he had dashed away (why the hell does everyone keep stealing from Kankuro? Really, what as he done to them?). He played a pitiful tune that went well with the whining angst coming from the inner. Naruto, meanwhile continued to listen but had also sent a look of approval to the ex-Sand shinobi in the background.

Inner G failed to notice Mr Haruna's strongly implied sarcasm in the background, he was feeling too lost of epic-ness to notice anything other than this. He felt he needed to just go die somewhere, though he technically couldn't "die" unless Gaara did – and then failing to be reincarnated to someone else within a time frame. Yeah, inners are complicated, huh?

After a mild pause, Inner G turned away from a grimacing and previously-mourning-over-a-beverage Naruto. He decided to switch his attention to the vast sky above them, gazing upward at a flock of birds passing by with one of them struggling to keep up (that's some convenient symbolism). "Right now, I'm better off going back to the crack-aholic dude, his spacy daughter, and the stoic dude at their home in the gas station. At least there, I can think meh life over without having to tell it to 'ya faces and be judged like I can tell ya' are doing right now."

Before he could allow Naruto to have anymore say in this odd version of a conversation, Inner G assumed a sulking position (you know, head hung and shoulders slumped and limp), and was fully prepared to walk away feeling as though he just told them off.

Inner G did NOT tell anyone off like he thought, the only thing that Naruto got out of that was that this guy seriously needed a therapist to follow him around! Just like...well...EVERYONE he had ever met in his entire life. And he could use some kind of motivation to get back in this game, to win _The Game_, and help them interfere into Gaara's thoughts so they could defeat Iris and her not-friends to get their RV back in good hands!

Within seconds, Naruto was fully pissed off and began to yell, "You keep rambling about wanting to be accepted by all of us! You never will be, until you can prove yourself as a valuable ally in the darkest moments of this trippy road trip!" The outburst was so out of nowhere that it left the Fox Boy panting for breath by the last word, he took some deep breaths even though he should have mastered the art of yelling one's lungs out a long time ago. Inner G flinched, Mr. Haruna had stopped playing the violent off key and stared as Naruto went on now having found more words. "Look, I can't say I can put myself in your place...actually, none of us can because it's so freaking weird. But do you know what kinds of things that are going to plaque you if you don't take a chancing step and help us?"

Inner G remained quiet.

"I'll tell you!" Naruto mentioned, briefly sweat-dropping upon seeing no one had answered the question sarcastically as he was expecting. He approached Inner G and gave his back a literal shove in the right direction, he didn't get a protest either. And at this point, the both of them were surveying the RV currently jumping inches into the air where loud noises and violence could be heard. "You will probably lose all little respect that you've gained since Madame Star's extraction incident! Next time you see Hisako, she probably will remove that honorific and speak coldly to you! And I'm pretty sure that you'll be the laughingstock of every inner, forced to hide in shame as people point and laugh and be the inside joke of-"

"Naruto! Don't imply that a fellow traveling companion will turn into a MEME!" Mr. Haruna scolded from the sidelines as he spectated rather well. Rather is put before well, because he would have been doing this perfectly had he not opened his big mouth.

Both Naruto and Inner G had to look over at the ex-Sand shinobi and wear annoyed expressions. But, they soon recovered and were immersed back into the moment.

"I'm just saying..." Inner G finally flickered his gaze back to Naruto, whom had his eyes downcast and his expression loosing much emotion as he looked blank...it was time to pull out the ace. The final trick up his sleeve that would no doubt bring the inner to go along like a boss no matter what stood in his way; "Temari may even begin to crush on you once you display an act of heroism~..."

Another silence, but this time, it meant the situation was turning around for Naruto's benefit and the ace yet again succeeded. He had to cover a satisfied smirk with a hand as he slowly leaned forward and glanced at Inner G, whom was getting mental images of Temari fawning over him because he helped them kinda battle Iris and her companions and even going as far as to grasp his wrist tightly and lead him into a dark room – that was when he purposely shut off that thought not entirely willingly. The inner was obviously considering giving in, judging by his stunned expression and the brilliant shade of red decorating his pale cheeks.

During this time, Naruto looked over at an ecstatic Mr. Haruna, whom was giving him two thumbs up. Feeling nothing short of proud of himself, the previously-mourning-over-a-beverage Fox Boy soaked up all of the glory like a sponge.

And everyone was unaware of the fact that during all of this, there help was not needed whatsoever. Kankuro and Gaara were able to win the confrontation with ease, and were currently adding the finishing touches to their victory comments. Damn, it probably would have been awesome if Naruto was able to get Inner G and Mr. Haruna to join him in bursting in and making an over the top entrance. But as it is, this works okay enough.

Immediately, Inner G's eyes flickered to a close and he began to concentrate. He concentrated quite well actually, his concentration level would have literally been over nine thousand if we had a scouter and Mrs. Haruna to laugh at that reference. Anyway, Naruto was overjoyed to see that this was working, he was going to try and get into contact with his man again! Just because Temari "may return his feelings if he does something to help them out"!

So lost in his joy, Naruto had actually dashed over to Mr. Haruna and the both of them cheered and glomped each other, not really noticing how to people passing by they kind of looked gay. But! That would have to be elaborated on later if any logic whatsoever were to make it's appearance! Pfft, as if!

**.**

**AND BACK WITH KANKURO AND GAARA**

Back in the RV, the place was a wreak with items covering the floors, sand falling off furniture and the window corners, and some writing on the wall that read "Akatsuki Rulz" in purple marker.

It seemed that the three weirdos were brought down and at the brothers' mercy. Iris and Twiggy were both back to back in the middle of the floor with some really strong chakra thread around their stomachs and restricting any movement, Iris struggled in vain to break free and the dirty kid behind her bowed her head in shame. Akatsuki (whom rules, as stated by that badly-drawn and horribly-spelled graffiti) was being held helplessly by his back in Gaara's hand.

Kankuro gazed around at the results of their confrontation...which barely lasted three minutes. If you counted the beginning exchange of hate words, then you must take back thirty seconds. He nodded, as if he understood what just happened even though he barely did. "That was easier than I wanted it to be."

"Kankuro, do you realize we had to deal with a failure of a Mist nin, a helpless lizard who could be taken down by simply stepping on him, and a useless and yet mysterious young girl who looks as if she hasn't bathed in weeks?" Gaara pointed out, glancing at Kankuro whom still struggled to accept this went much too easily their way. He really hoped for something as epic as his two battles with Salamander, but this worked out alright.

The hate exchanges were kind of useless if you think about it. It pretty much went like this:

"Fail Girl..."

"Stupid excuse of a puppet master."

"Raccoon mystery dude."

"Retarded-looking blue lizard whom I haven't ever seen before."

"...TWIGGY~!"

And then, the supposed action, if you could call it that, took place shortly afterward. The first to make a move was Iris, whom began to freak out because she hadn't been prepared for this and so she tried to run over to the window and open it and escape – only, she barely arrived at the window before Kankuro had ran to her and made a pretty good attempt at clasping his arms around her lower torso and pulling her away whilst she screamed about being "violated".

Gaara had then awkwardly glanced around before he shifted his eyes to the left and Twiggy and Akatsuki (whom was resting on her shoulder in that moment) did the same. The three of them had locked eyes before Gaara assumed a defensive stance and summoned some sand through a crack in the window ("ACK! SAND IN MY EYES!" Iris had cried out when several grains had accidentally launched into her eye, she had doubled backward in agony and dragged her and Kankuro to the floor), the two possible pals yelped at that and began to take cover underneath the table.

While Gaara was able to scoop up Twiggy and Akatsuki after a short chase scene, which he didn't even have to physically take part in with the way he sent two large waves of sand in the formation of giant hands to follow them everywhere, he managed to finally capture Twiggy first and he clasped arm across her chest and pressed her close to prevent her escape, while his sand brought back Akatsuki and then dumped him off in his palm.

Kankuro had it almost too easily with Iris too. While Gaara pretty much owned the child and lizard-thing without lifting a finger, he managed to wrestle the fail girl around on the floor while she screamed in agony about sand burning her eye sockets. He eventually stood back up and held her by both of her arms that had ceased flailing. Offering a teeny little amount of sympathy, by the way, Gaara had told the epic-faced lizard to shoot some water into her eyes to wash them out (which he did, only because Akatsuki assumed he should be somewhat useful after being summoned from his slave driver of a boss). Finally, Kankuro brought forth chakra threads and – carelessly might I mention – threw Iris at Gaara's feet and then cleverly used this thread to tie up the two girls, since Akatsuki was so tiny...Gaara just kept a strong grip on his back and let him dangle from a rather high distance for his standards in a very humiliating way.

And...yeah...that is pretty much all that happened. Which is why they didn't need any backup whatsoever and certainly didn't have to worry about using up too much chakra. After all, they really should have seen this coming, just as Gaara had stated, because of the trio's major fail-ness high ranking on the scale of worthlessness. And to be honest, he could hardly believe Iris and her posse could be considered this story's...kind of a major...antagonist. She was hardly that of a pathetic filler person. Hey, even Matsuri had more substance than her.

Ah, speaking of Matsuri...

Gaara's cellphone went off, the ringtone of _Haunted _by _Evanescence _piercing the silence in all of the song's freaky glory. Well...at least he was finally starting to get some good taste for ringtones.

Iris actually kind of liked that song. As soon as it arrived at the chorus, she was humming along horribly out of tune and was bobbing her head. And just as she was really into it, Twiggy nicely looked up at Gaara and mentioned it sounded like that music was coming from his pocket. Of course, this caused Iris to elbow the annoying kid when he answered it and the music ended too soon for it's own good.

"Hello?" Gaara answered, once accepting the call and putting the phone to his ear. He didn't even have to look at the number to know who was probably calling at this time...

The first thing he heard was crappy static noises. Then obvious snickering in the background, causing his stoic expression to crack long enough to reveal almost amusing agitation over this.

"_Let the bodies hit the floor, let the bodies hit the floor..._" A raspy singing voice, still painfully obviously Matsuri's, began to belt out dramatically.

Then, really obnoxious sounds of someone smacking a wall could be heard followed by an out of tune guitar. And Matsuri's terrible singing voice continued to belt out those lyrics silently until...

"_Let the bodies hit the...__**FLOOOOOR**__...!_" Gaara visibly flinched and held the phone out from his ear as Matsuri's still-raspy singing voice turned to high-pitched drawling out the 'floor' part. Meanwhile, Kankuro exchanged looks of bewilderment with Iris and Twiggy.

"HOLY SHIT, THE BODIES ARE HITTING THE FLOOR!" A wailing voice (obviously Baki, as Gaara knew from personal experience what his wail sounds like. Erm...don't ask...) could be heard proclaiming in the background as the smacking noises went off in some terrible tune and the guitar sounded like ear rape.

"_**LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR! LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR! LET THE BOD-**_"

"Matsuri, Baki, I KNOW it's you two trying to prank call me." Gaara deadpanned, his entire right ear felt like it was throbbing from that awful excuse of a performance and he had to substitute the phone to his left. The...ear rape music died down immediately and Matsuri was no longer singing while Baki was no longer snickering whilst making cries of agony in the background. "And, listen, if you two don't stop this stupidity...I'm going to let _your bodies hit the floor_. But, please don't take it personally. Because, _one, nothing's wrong with me_." And with that said, Gaara smirked in a fleeting manner (no one else but Akatsuki noticed it) and ended the call, he even put the phone on vibrate and stuffed it away.

Iris overheard the entire shenanigans of the Sand ninja. Frankly, she was appalled by their lack of talent. She also could feel blood drip from her left ear and her arm to go into a twitching spasm. "Oh...my...God...I know that the song is awesome...BUT THEY TOTALLY MURDERED IT! MY EARS! MY EARS ARE GONNA BLOW UP!"

Of course, they wouldn't literally do that. But then again, it's unlikely anyone would take a break to care in the first place. So, yeah...

**.**

**AND IN THE HIDDEN SAND**

Matsuri and Baki were still in the process of cleaning up the Sand Sibs' home before they returned. Honestly, it's not Matsuri's determination to impress Gaara which succeeded in putting a stop on the festivities, Baki and everyone else had just passed out drunk and it led her to be able to get things...three-thirds of the way in order a least until a shamed Baki decided to help her.

And he kind of only helped her because Sari told him that Matsuri was going to blackmail him with his one-man concert he had given everyone in the village while they were all drunk, and play it all during the upcoming council meeting. Of course, it's not like Sari wasn't ashamed of what she had done either...it's just, no matter how much she and the Kazekage's old student fought, they were still pals and she couldn't possibly blackmail her.

Before they had decided to prank call again, the duo managed to spiff up Temari's room nicely. They were proud of their workmanship. Her room looked good enough to split a frappe inside of. Mmm...and speaking of frappes...ah, Baki thought to himself that he really wanted one. With extra creme atop it. But, Matsuri had drove her elbow into his chest and glared at him for becoming unfocused. They then proceeded to go into the hallway of the second floor and straighten it up.

Honestly, the hallway looked as if a frat party had just taken place. Well, one would easily make the comparison.

Beer cans littered the floor, some of the wood was scratched or totally missing, the pale green wallpaper was torn and had mysterious white blotches splattered in the corner with a pile consisting of clothes and a box of condoms (Matsuri didn't even want to inspect that part of the hallway), the ceiling had a chandelier that was not their before and had some chick's bra and thong hanging off, there was kunai knives and swords tossed around from a previous drunken brawl, someone's missing tooth glued to the wall, turned over decorations, and the main bathroom's bathtub was also discarded in the middle of the floor.

The two ninja had stared at all of this, and then each other.

And that brings us to the point of where they decided to procrastinate on purpose and prank call Gaara. They had recently gotten the song _Bodies _stuck in their heads and wanted to perform it too. This way, they could kill two birds with one stone. So to speak.

Matsuri sighed as she noticed the call had been ended. She stuffed it back in the pocket of her vest and then looked over at Baki with a disappointed expression. "Gaara verbally defeated us. And I don't think he's going to like us calling him over and over again when there's nothing serious going on. Besides..." She flinched as to gaze around the room at the wreckage. "All three of them are going to kill us if we don't clean up the house PRONTO before they find out what you and the rest of the villagers did!"

"Does this mean..." Baki piped up, walking over and sighing deeply. "We can't take a break and go out for frappes before we get started on this hallway?"

"THIS IS NO TIME FOR GREEK COFFEE DRINKS, BAKI!" Matsuri replied unnecessarily loud, a vein popping onto her head. "We will only leave this house for supplies and that's it! Until we get ourselves in gear and fix this house YOU and EVERYONE ELSE destroyed before they find out!"

Baki just shut up and began to hurriedly gather the cans of beer. And while he did that, Matsuri grabbed the convenient stepladder nearby and climbed up to reach the hanging undergarments on the (random) chandelier.

**.**

**...Again...back with Gaara and Kankuro where things made just as much sense in context...**

"Now that all of that is over," Twiggy piped up, appearing to be innocent and scared to death as she looked back up at Gaara. He tried to not be swayed by her, as it could have easily been a trick. Since she was teaming up with Iris, he couldn't put her past this. "What are you going to do to us? I know that Iris is happy – because she's a sadist and all...but I don't think I'm of legal age-"

Now looking beet red, Iris whipped her head to meet Gaara's eyes and she appeared to be both angry and mortified as she yelled, "I am not a sadist...! U-um...and besides...this is kind of uncomfortable even for me...n-not th-that I just ADMITTED anything..."

Kankuro rolled his eyes at that, he then briskly passed by the two girls tied up on the floor and approached Gaara, lowering his voice to barely a whisper. "So what do we do with them?"

"Well, they are completely useless and the female look alike of _Ichigo Kurosaki _over there does want to kill Yumi and her parents because of some old shame they've done..." Gaara stated, lowering his monotone to barely a whisper as well. It was like the two of them didn't want the girls or the lizard to overhear, even though they weren't even saying anything top secret. "I guess we can free everyone, but kick them out of the RV and then tear off down the road with the copied key in my pocket; stopping long enough to pick up my inner, Naruto, and Yumi's dad and then go pick up everyone else."

"_Yo, that's a great plan!_" Gaara's eyes widened for a moment as he heard that familiar voice pass through his mind. There was no mistake, this was Inner G. Sigh. How wonderful. "_Check. It. Out. Things have been progressing with 'ya and 'ya freaky bro right? 'Cause I managed to break through the blockage that prevented meh from speakin' to 'ya! But have no fear, Inner G is here! Check this out too: __meh, the Fox Boy, and even Yumi's bizarre old man are comin' to save 'ya two like some big damn heroes!_"

Gaara facepalmed at this piece of news. For a second, his hand gradually fell off his face and he then replied inwardly, "_Honestly, that won't be necessary-_"

"TOO LATE!" Inner G could be heard shouting from nearby out in the open. Gaara, Kankuro, Akatsuki, Iris, and Twiggy all craned their heads to the RV's backdoor to see it get slid open fast and have Inner G throw himself inside and then face plant into the passenger seat, he was followed by Naruto and Mr. Haruna whom rolled and jumped to their feet gracefully...like the ninja they were.

Everyone else sweatdropped as Naruto happily looked around whilst smiling, asking if they had missed anything good.

**To Be Continued**

**.**

**AAAAH! IT'S BEEN LIKE MONTHS SINCE I'VE LASTED UPDATED! DON'T KILL ME! I FULL AM AWARE OF MY HORRID UPDATING SCHEDULE! *Proceeds to freak out and cower from all of your stares of hate***

**...*Composes self* Okay, ahem, I know it's been awhile. Hopefully this chapter will make up for it – I really enjoyed writing it, particularly when Naruto and Inner G have a dramatic moment and when Matsuri and Baki try to prank call Gaara. XD What made it all the more better was having my visiting dad walk up behind me while I was writing the latter scene (he's like a ninja himself when he needs to be) and was all disturbed. LOL. He asked me why I was writing about a bizarre fraternity party with Japanese characters involved...the explanation after that was really awkward. But he's a good sport, I guess that's where I get my occasional epic-ness from. His side of the family.**

**Anyway, my question for you, which I stated in the beginning A/N is this:**

**Who do you think I should in their POV for the next chapter? Not to spoil anything major, but the Sand Sibs and co. get their RV back and are going to ditch this roadside hell. But the chapter is going to be narrated by one of the OCs, so who, out of this list, do you want to see do it?**

_**(1) Mr. Haruna**_

_**(2) Mrs. Haruna**_

_**(3) Yumi**_

_**(4) Inner G**_

_**(5) Denise**_

_**(6/the joke choice) A stalker Iris**_

**I'll use whatever choice got the most votes in the review. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the chapter, please excuse my tardiness! I will try to be sort out some special time for this story and start updating slightly more frequently until it's finished! Read and review!**

**-MidnightSakuraBlossom**


	7. Insanity Is Everywhere

**Okay, so we've got a timeskip now. Like, two days. I hope you like it.**

**There's the introduction of yet another OC in this chapter. He won't be major, but he will have an ongoing subplot for a change of pace and it should last for a handful of chapters until resolution. You may or may not find the dude likeable. IDK. Personally, I think he can be annoying but he's also amusing to write because...well...you'll see as you read those parts.**

**This chapter will be mostly narrated by Mrs. Haruna, I believe some of the OCs should get their chances to narrate, to give you more of a pic of how their mind is.**

**-MidnightSakuraBlossom**

**.**

**The Sand Siblings Go On A Road Trip**

**Chapter 48: Insanity Is Everywhere, Did You Expect Anything Less?**

**.**

MRS. HARUNA'S POV

Yes, I'm jumping for joy! I can't believe I get to narrate a chapter! ...Ahem, I did not mean to break the fourth wall with that statement, and I hope I don't seem to unprofessional. Please excuse the shouting.

I wish to tell so many things, but I believe I will start with the beginning of what happened when me, my wonderful husband, interesting daughter, and new-found friends acquired our RV again. Hm. As much as I do like the RV me and my family have...acquired a while ago before we haphazardly escaped the Ninja World, I don't mind traveling with everyone else...I know that we have fun despite our differences. I know that we get along by the end of the day. That's all that counts.

Let's see...I am thirty-nine years of age, do not call me old. If I were old, I couldn't get a grasp on the old katana I carry in a hidden sheath under my shirt and and slice you into a galaxy far far away like something out _Dragon Ball_, could I? I'm usually the one who tries to make peace and I guess I can be a little too concerned about health and the like. I guess aging does that to you, because I used to flip off the thought of being the peacemaker or drop all my favorite foods (salted fish...sigh...). Now I believe it's for the best.

I know that everyone around probably thinks of me as quirky, what with my random tendencies and my obsession for all that is _Dragon Ball_. But I like to think of myself as an interesting soul with just enough personality points to not seem like a failure of all that exists...like that young Iris girl.

Anyway, moving on...

So my husband, Gaara, Kankuro, Inner G, and Naruto, they all managed to take down Iris and her friends from the way I understand this. At least, that's what Inner G kept rambling about upon the return back to the store and home. I was impressed that they all worked together, and I can't help but wonder why Gaara and Kankuro kept insisting that the two of them were the ones to do all the work. Were they trying to soak all of the glory for themselves? Kankuro I understand...but Gaara...? The latter seems to be an excellent young man, I couldn't be more approving of him to date Yumi...and maybe move on and seal the deal. If you know where I am going with that. I asked them several times if they were going to seal the deal, but Gaara had stared with a bemused look and Yumi was sputtering and flailing because she had choked on a leftover bottle of root beer that Naruto guy happened to bring along. Ah, to be their age and together.

My sweet husband, _ and I could be a little mushy together oh so many years ago. But me and _ have also been able to live without seeing each other for one day. I mean, really, it is kind of stupid when couples are so clingy to each other that they cannot go thirty-three minutes without speaking, or at least thinking about one another. Then again, it could be like Gaara's feisty inner and Temari's unrequited and borderline situation. I suppose it would make sense in that context.

Hmm...am I rambling? Oh, sorry about that, it's just that the topic of romance and the like tends to make me spout off like I don't know what. Hopeless romantic at heart, I hardly doubt that will change. Perhaps I'm also sentimental, ugh, shall I move on?

Now, getting to the good stuff, my darling husband and the teenage boys drove the RV back to the gas station and told us all that happened. At that time, me and the girls had just finished complying with Temari and removing all of the girly additions we pimped her out with. The adorable dress, the outlandish jewelry my daughter picked out (I think she has a jewelry fetish, because she loves to wear a lot and sighs dreamily when she sees another do the same), and the makeup. We also set her lovely blonde locks back in those stale and unappealing four pigtails. She really needs o find a new style, or take our advice and wear it down because she looks so nice that way – I am sure the young men would have toasted to that at the sight, and ener...I mean, INNER G would have passed out from blood loss through the nose. Can people really have deadly nose bleeds by the way? I see them in anime, and when I watch the perverts on _Dragon Ball _and it's adaptions I get confused. Well, I will search that later on the internet. That's where I also learned that there's such a thing of fear of needles – I never believed that to be true until hearing a medical article about it! Haha! I just keep learning new things every day!

Ahem. I was so overjoyed that he didn't have to stay with Han, Andries, and Holly that I screamed loud enough for a glass bowl filled with pineapples to crack and go flying, and then I threw myself into _'s chest and cried into the handsome midnight blue shirt Han and loaned him. Also, it should be mentioned that Naruto was so overjoyed too, he grinned and then ran and tried to throw himself into Gaara's arms judging by the position...but Gaara was so unmoving because he was filled with relief of us no longer stranded, that he forgot to catch him. You may already know this, but Naruto did indeed fall painfully on his behind. I rolled my eyes and then grasped my husband's handsome shirt and I pulled him in for a kiss.

It took us a day to finally leave the convenience store/home. But I think none of us truly hated our time there, it's just we really preferred the freedom of the open road. That, and Naruto and the siblings would have to return to their home villages back in that horribly-violent Ninja World we tried our best to put behind us. During the day, we loaded up all of the clothes Yumi and Denise were determined to drag along because they found the sense of style Holly harbored to be great. And the two of them really are girly girls at heart. That Andries boy had to fill up the tank again, and he also wanted to sit Denise down and give her tips on great storytelling for her psychological thriller manga she wants to write. I have to admit, he seemed to know what he was doing. Is it just me, or would they make a cute couple someday? Again, this may be my hopeless romantic side talking.

So, this brings us to leaving the place:

We all stood outside near the gas pumps, Han, Holly, and Andries were lined up looking kind of down that such freaky company was leaving so soon. But I think they understood, they were good people. And good people always understand what you must do in certain situations. Anyway, me and the rest of the group lined up too, feeling like we should at least give a formal goodbye just as we did when parting ways with the Sato siblings.

"Well, it's been chaotic," Gaara kicked off the goodbyes with that statement. Rather blunt I admit, but even Inner G was silent because he knew that he just stated what had been on the mind of everyone else, and potentially me included. His eyes were locked on the three, they all moved in closer and nodded. "Maybe we'll encounter you again, or maybe we won't. Either way, I wrote down our phone numbers and plastered them to the refrigerator doors for you. Just in the situation you're remembered, or Andries and Denise want to talk as fellow authors."

Denise suddenly piped up a little too enthusiastically after that, we all stared at her blankly. "Yes! That would be the only reason, with my long-term memory loss I wouldn't want to ever lose what valuable hints you've given me, Andries! And, Gaara left this out," A collection of yawns of boredom ensued as Denise clasped her hands together and lifted a foot, as if trying to appear cute when Andries looked at her intensely. "We are grateful for the hospitality you've given us total strangers! I honestly wish there were more people like you! Han, you're a simple man but someone I admire for your generic tendencies which people like THEM should follow. Holly, I can't say I got along with you well but I enjoyed getting to be a girly girl with you and even giving Temari that brief makeover which Gaara's inner self didn't get to view and he's pissed because of it. Andries...I..."

There was a completely useless pause after this. It was as if Denise lost her awareness of the world whenever she and Andries met eyes. They continued to stare at each other, smiling in their own ways. I would be telling a big fat lie if I said it wasn't slightly romantic, it reminded so much of the past when me and my darling husband were crazy teenagers engaged for years – making the wedding night all the more of a long wanted paradise may might I add. I think these two have gotten stabbed with a classical case of love at first sight and I'm all for their getting together, I really wanted Andries to embrace the girl and ask her to be his wife...in a few years.

Well, this story isn't exactly a fairytale or much of a romantic one even though there are couples. Andries didn't approach her, hug and or kiss, or pull out the big ring for her. All he did was shyly keep his gaze on the ground and sway a little as he said the following.

"Denise, I don't us to never see each other again." Oh well, it was still kind of cute. I had grinned like a stupid person and linked arms with Yumi's father and everyone else including Han and Holly mimicked what appeared to be wither gagging or puking. "I understand you aim high with your dreams, and I'm going to be supporting you until the end. And when your manga is published, you can be assured I will spend any amount of money to buy it first and call and give my praise."

"That's sweet and all," Yumi chimed, pushing past Kankuro and my husband and taking a few forward steps to Andries and Denise. Her facial expression revealed confusion. "What will you do if Denise FAILS to write a manga with enough worth to be published? And besides, you don't even know if she has the talent for it."

Understandably, Denise was angered. She stomped a foot, possibly leaving scruffs on her pretty cornflower blue sandals she had been given personally by Han's weird and girly daughter.

But Andries broke his stoic face long enough to smirk for a moment. It faded as soon as it came, and he then walked up to his mangaka love interest.

"I know talent when I see it. And besides, she obviously has no other talent." Andries stated quite bluntly. Yumi performed a face plant in the background, and Denise's eyes lit up with joy despite the statement she had no other talent up her sleeve. "You will be able to succeed, and you've got the rest of the group to provide support until that fateful day. So don't worry."

"Yeah, I'll keep trying~!" Denise chirped, grinning like oh, I think on the same level as that pale blue lizard that follows around that freaky orange-haired version of a female Ichigo. Yumi mimicked gagging again, and then turned and decided to be the first one to pile into the RV. In fact, everyone else besides me and Kankuro left the scene to prepare to leave. "Andries, thank you for everything. Your suggestions weren't tuned out, but I won't go with a shojo story. I'm still doing a psychological thriller and you can't stop me."

"If you want a challenge, then go for it. Goodbye, Deinse."

Han suddenly stomped a foot and appeared to be annoyed. "Andries, speed it up! I can see customers beginning to appear!"

Andries flinched at that, outwardly. I could see him heave a sigh and roll his eyes just as he turned around and began to walk back to his family. Holly, meanwhile, was giggling and giving comments of teasing that she didn't know he could be so into the topic of creating a piece of reading material.

I had approached Denise and pulled her by the arm, saying, "Come on, Denise. If you're going to be traveling with us temporarily, we must head out for the next destination as soon as possible."

Denise merely swatted by arm away. Oh God, I was SO offended by that and reached behind me, to the sheath that was attached to my curve-flattering red sundress (one that I had bought in North City, I am so glad that the Sato siblings gave us that modern money), and grasped the handle of my favorite sword I started carrying around now that everyone was aware of our deep dark secret. Kankuro had to leap over and restrain me from breaking by vow to never resort to violence and leave my shinobi status in the past. If he wasn't there, who knows what I may have done!

Denise began trotting over to her love interest, she had to almost tackle him in order to make him stop. Once Andries caught a hold of himself and met her sparkling eyes...that's when she did something I hardly expected of her though I was thrilled.

The aspiring mangaka whom I've recently accused of not having the courage to make a move on her crush (I said this in conversation with Han and my husband, so not within her earshot). But what she did just before we all parted ways for what seemed like for good...just...it was a cheesy move, but it was oddly sweet and the points provided by that fact were enough to give it the okay seal.

Denise had captured her crush into a very inexperienced and turbulent, yet enthusiastic kiss. Her eyes screwed closed and she probably wore a dazed expression as she melted into the moment too fast, I knew she had never done this before because of her having to grasp his shoulders and try to keep her lips in one place. Andries looked shocked as shocked could get, but that wasn't to say he wasn't turning a vivid shade of red and going rigid.

After Denise broke that kiss, she took a rather long time trying to recover from the shock of what she did. She stared at Andries with wide eyes. But she recovered soon, obviously by hearing me clap and give cheers for her because I am – as we all know by now, a hopeless romantic deep down. That's just the way it is. And I'm not afraid to say I like it that way. Anyway, Denise didn't even give the boy a chance to ask what just happened; she realized that kissing had quite the rush of thrill and so she caught him a helpless hold with her arms clinging around his torso and her lips dominating his own that I would think both of their lips would end up bruised and battered after that.

Watching them made Han and Holly feel like voyeurs. So they had the dignity to turn around and start chatting excitedly just to tune out the new-found couple. Whom I hoped greatly that their relationship would not falter. I know that long-distance relationships aren't easy...my old teammate, Daisuke, he had that kind of connection with a civilian girl from the Hidden Rocks and they failed to make the sparks last.

But as long as they swore to not be too easily swayed by a girl or guy of the week, like Kankuro and that Hisako girl, then their love would never falter! Because as I know from personal experience: true love cannot be moved or destroyed by the simple things and even an earthquake couldn't shake it!

Ahem, forgive me. My hopeless romantic side was showing for a second. But I assure you that's over with. Because nothing else to truly speak about happened after we parted ways with everyone. After this, we all kind of piled into the RV and drove away with a lot of glee and giving obscene finger gestures to the occasional speed limit sign. By the way, I did later punish Yumi for doing that.

Her punishment consisted of having to clean off the freaking horrifying dark purple paint that the epic lizard companion of Iris wrote on the walls with ("Akatsuki Rulz", I believe this was what the message Gaara and Kankuro reported to me said with terrible spelling), with her own toothbrush and water and soap. Oh yeah, I went there.

**.**

**TIME SKIP TO PRESENT**

In the present time, here we all are chilling in the RV. This time, Temari is taking the wheel and letting my sweet _ take a break. I know _ feels grateful for that too. His hands are beginning to bruise from gripping the wheel so much and he is deaf to top that off (thanks a lot, Kankuro and your mistreatment of puppets).

I decided that, since it was around lunchtime, to make a healthy light meal for everyone. Thankfully, Iris and her gang didn't ravage the food and it was still fresh. I gathered handfuls of veggies, fruits, nuts, and some of that homemade cranberry dressing I stole from the eating area in that North Garden hotel. And humming nonsensical tunes, I took up the task of making a huge salad. When Kankuro noticed I was doing this, he immediately reached for a package of dangerously unhealthy cookies on the counter and scarfed them down as if that was his last meal. Weakling.

Meanwhile, if I looked behind me, I could make out some of the group. I could see my sweet husband lying on the couch taking a nap, the back of Temari's head in the driver's seat, Kankuro still forcing the cookies down his windpipe, and Denise sitting at the table with a lot of scattered papers and pens – I think she was trying to put her ideas out on the panels to see if her manga would be good enough. And about Yumi, Naruto, _Energy_, and Gaara, I have no idea where they were in the vehicle or what they were doing.

A few hours of traveling went by kind of quietly and slow. Nothing to speak of happened, we just drove along to the right direction to West Village, a destination we've yet to see and I want to.

Because I hear a lot about West Village. Firstly: the place is probably the oldest of the locations in this area, it was established and named three-hundred years ago and manages to stay with the times (meaning that right now, of the Modern World, it's the city that always is modernized and never falls behind fads, trends, pop culture, regular culture, you name it). And here are some more fun facts I looked at over the internet a few days ago: West Village is located IN THE WEST – isn't that baffling, just HOW is that possible? West Village also is big on saving the planet (meaning that littering is a sin, pulling out plugs at night is a okay, and if you recycle then you are an angel in disguise). A less-known fact is that West Village has the highest approval rating of things that are usually considered obscene (meaning you can punch someone on the shoulder like guy friends do and NOT get arrested for a violent assault, eat with your mouth open, use bad language that would make any evil and tough dude from every anime ever blush, and same sex couples are not uncommon to see). I don't know if some of these things are good or not. But what I, _ Haruna am sure of is that this will be a good experience for all of us.

After crashing into the oddity of East Ville and North City, it's only natural that we check out West Village. Hmm...mmm...huh...hey, is there a naming pattern going on here? I sense something, although seeing as though I'm just a lowly ex-Sand kunoichi and devoted wife I cannot place any mere theory. Someone of better status in this story than me...they will have to crack this.

A few more minutes passed after those hours passed. But it was incredibly noteworthy that Naruto, Gaara, Yumi, and _Energy_ were not present for lunch. I already prepared my...not so much world famous salad and already had Temari, my husband, Denise, and a reluctant Kankuro there to pig out. However, those four were not here. Wouldn't they have assumed that by the RV parking on the side of the road and not moving a signal that we were to gather for a wholesome and healthy lunch?

So, here we are all gathered at the table. Of course, I'm smiling sweetly and and serving the meal. After making the salad, I considering adding more to the menu and I did – I added some slices of deliciously sour lemons, assorted whole wheat crackers, and glasses of crisp and natural water...from bottles! Oh, it was all so lovely and it was so mouth-watering despite Kankuro's comments of the salad looking like goulash, being allergic to whole wheat, and eating lemons being against his religion.

We all sat down and then prepared to eat. But before that could be done, a soft bang alerted both me and Kankuro to noise. We both glanced at each other, obviously as we were sitting very closely, and then tried to make something of what that could be.

"I think I heard something." Kankuro was the first to mention. He strained his ears and listened for anything else, I don't know if he heard the next mildly louder bang that I did. I nodded briskly, no one else seemed to be paying much attention. "Listen guys, it sounds like...bangs. And not in THAT way, but something heavy striking against a target."

I knew what was coming after that...even though this time Kankuro didn't mean anything lewd. Denise noticed and she swallowed her large bite of three crackers and went into a sniggering fit. I could hear her say "That's what she said...last night in the bedroom." Under her breath.

"So it was her, with the heavy weapon, in the bedroom!" Temari suddenly said, and I don't even know why she did. Maybe she misinterpreted Denise's unusually lewd comment (which I have to say: that's very uncalled for). I think she was also misunderstanding it as something from that _Clue _game.

Again, Denise sniggered. This time her reaction was more obvious due to her taking a large bite of salad and having it forcefully spat out all over the floor during her sniggering. When recovered, she commented a little louder, "That's how she described it to her friends the day after!"

The only person to find that kind of humor hilarious was Kankuro. I gave him and the Korean mangaka a stern look before turning my attention to the side doors of the RV, that was where some thuds could be heard. I was worried...what if the place was under attack? Or what if it was yet another traumatizing earthquake that could drive my darling daughter and Gaara to...seal the deal instead of just confess? Either way, I was not prepared. When I was a spunky teenager several years ago I WOULD have been prepared...and now I'm in my late thirties and not so much ready for disaster.

"Stop the sniggering, I hear that noise too." Temari mentioned, lowering her voice cautiously and arising from the table. Just as she demanded, Denise and her brother shut their mouths up. I was impressed, this girl never fails to impress me. "It sounds suspicious, we may not be getting to enjoy our health nut lunch right now."

"Thank the nonexistent god of my made up religion!" Kankuro suddenly proclaimed with enthusiasm, raising his arms in victory. He was loud, and so the thuds outside became louder. Temari gave him a less than amused expression.

"Well, we-we can't just not do anything!" My husband proclaimed dramatically, leaping from the table after swallowing last few bites of salad. I was relieved I didn't have to turn on his hearing aid again, but it was only a matter of time before that pest of a machine acted up. "Dear, get Yumi! We cannot allow her to charge into danger when it's obvious she can't do anything to be impressed by!"

"But I thought she was a Sand kunoichi." Temari pointed out, giving _ a look. "Please don't tell me that someone from my own village is a terrible excuse of a shinobi."

"No, she's fairly well. But she hasn't practiced or learned any new techniques in a few years and I fear she's rusty. Even if she can still manage chakra control, it doesn't mean she's capable of genocide."

"...Well, I thought she left that one time to practice her skills. Unless...this was never cover up story."

"Gaara reported that when he ran into her, she failed in masking her presence and to convince him that she was not Yumi as part of the cover up story. Doesn't that tell you something? Temari, I just fear for the safety of my own flesh and blood!" _ said this so passionately, with fire burning in his vast blue eyes and his arm raised to the ceiling. It reminded me of what made me fall in love with him. And ever since a certain mission that ended our lives as Shinobi, this was the first time I saw it return. Man, he could make that look so hot.

Temari's eyes widened at the sudden intensity. "Well...okay...I understand your reasons for keeping Yumi away from whatever creep is lurking out there." She recovered form shock and folded her arms against her chest before turning her back. "That fire that burned in your eyes...it's what I like to see in people. It's what I like to see in true Sand shinobi, and I – for once since we first met – respect you. But...I don't respect people long, so don't expect this to last."

It's okay, I know that respect is a hard thing to give people if you're like Temari. I didn't really want the respect, because I'm such a cowardly person now that I doubt it's fair. So I quickly told Temari to not think highly of me and then I pulled out my weapon of choice from the sheath still rested over my back.

I knew that we would have to act tough if we wanted to chase off whatever foul person that was outside of our RV! My mind was throbbing as I considered the possibility of it being Iris and her posse, because well, they annoy me a lot.

Randomly, the door to Gaara's room opened and he walked out with Inner G, Yumi, and Naruto. The scene was quite mysterious if you ask me, here's the gist of what we all saw: Naruto was carrying a laptop under his arm and looked normal, Yumi's hair was released from her long braid and she was dressed in that outfit of Holly's she had first tried on (which was weird, because she was wearing her typical ninja attire before this), Inner G's hair was mussier than usual and he was smacking his forehead as if he had disturbing mental images, and Gaara sported some shades and was still playing his DS (I have no evidence as to how he claimed it again, for this cracky story confuses me so).

I could only imagine what happened. At first, no one bothered explaining what kind of teenage affairs they had been getting into. I assumed they would tell us later, which they did, but we're not at that section yet. Anyway, the group gathered around us and Temari whispered at them to not make a sound because we all assumed an evil soul was outside the RV.

I began to tremble, I didn't know who could be outside or if they wanted anything to do with us. Maybe I'm just easily-frightened...but you do become that way after seeing terrible things like puppet's gaining life from a magical woman and seeking genocide. While I trembled, Yumi walked over and embraced me from the side, I knew she wasn't being comforting – I know my daughter. She was just scared to death and thought that, as the younger of us, she would be the last to be killed if this shady character outside meant harm.

Kankuro, in a hot-blooded moment, was the first one to take bold strides to the door and prepare to spring into action. While we stared blankly and stupidly, he quietly gave orders, "We can't stand around like this and not do anything. I say we all assume defensive stances, ready our weapons, and attack that guy out there – I know it's a guy because I can see the shadow from the window and there's no breasts."

Foolishly, Denise lowered her guard and joined Kankuro by the door. "That doesn't sound so bad, if it's a guy then I'm sure we can get the cutest girl in this RV to distract him with charm and suggestive implications. Like the main female character of my upcoming manga series will do whenever she tries to get past the loony bin's guards-"

"Sex appeal doesn't work on all guys!" Inner G (loudly) pointed out knowledgeably. Even though he obviously wasn't going anywhere with that statement, but he did seem offended. It was ironic.

In response, Denise giggled and then seemed to enter a flash back mode before replying, "But...you're like, the living proof that mere sex appeal can make guys melt like ice in the summer heat. Even though Temari established that borderline between you, you still swoon and gawk whenever she flashes some leg or when she does that knife-licking thing-"

"As much as I would love to hear that disgusting crap about my own sister," Kankuro spoke up sarcastically, sending an annoyed glance to Inner G and Denise. He added, this time more normally, "We've gotta shut up and make the surprise attack. I made myself leader and I say we assume the positions and draw the weapons, but what opinions do you harbor?"

We all shook our heads at the same time, not agreeing to Kankuro being the leader. It's not like I don't have some fondness of my new-found friend whom is much younger than I – however he's not leader material. That battle with Salamander at North City didn't really count, he just assumed role of leader because he knew that his personal problem. Right now, he had nothing to do with some stranger that won't leave from our RV.

Personally, I don't believe any of us should be the leader. But if anyone has to be...then why not Naruto? I've been informed that he's rather powerful, so yay. We're gonna be protected, yay.

Finally, Gaara stepped up and walked over to the door. He did what all of us were too stupid to do, he opened it up and then gestured for us to move out and confront the creep.

To be honest, we all nodded with approval and bolted out of the door in epic ways. Kankuro was annoyed the whole time, but he still reached for his wrapped puppets and bolted out of the door with us.

**.**

**OUTSIDE OF THE RV**

We all gathered closely and quietly pressed ourselves against the RV. It was horribly awkward, but I can explain how that formation worked out: Me, my sweet husband, Temari, and Yumi were against the RV. And Inner G was uncomfortably crushed against me with Denise clinging to his shoulders, Gaara was entangled with Kankuro trying to squeeze in between me and my husband. Naruto leaped atop the RV and lied on his stomach trying to peek over the edge.

...We're the biggest failures of stealth in the history of stealth, apparently. I knew we looked obvious.

But at least we were parked on the roadside near some heavily-grown trees and plants with a dirt path. Cars zoomed by, and there were faint images of buildings in the distance. Were we getting close to West Village? I have no idea. I really do want to see West Village, that was actually the first intended destination since me and my family left the Ninja World.

"I see the guy!" Naruto announced rather loudly, killing our stealth attempt even more. He whirled around and then leaped off the RV to his feet. All of us peeled ourselves off the RV and each other. "He's over there scratching our windows with a stick, it looks like he's trying to blatantly vandalize OUR property!"

"V-vandalize?" Denise repeated with horror. I glanced at her and then came close and slipped an arm around her quivering shoulders. "That's illegal in this part of the world! Scratching our windows with a stick is ONE thing...but purposely vandalizing is another!"

"For ONE TIME, I agree with you, Deinse." Gaara spoke up, appearing overall discontent of the situation. But even though he seemed that way, he was still rather calm and tough as nails. He's the perfect guy to keep my dramatic and crazy daughter in control and that's why I want them to seal the deal. "Naruto, what does this guy look like? And does he seem threatening?"

For a moment, Naruto appeared scandalized by the fact he had to reply. But then, he recovered and nervously poked at the dirt with his foot. "Um...you would just have to look at him yourself. Anyway, this it in a nutshell: he's around Mrs. Haruna's height, wears studs in his ears, has dark purple hair that I'm sure is dyed, and he doesn't seem threatening – just really mysterious like that eye similar to Itachi's back at North City."

So...let me get this straight: same height as me, studs in ears, dyed dark purple locks (HOLY-! DARK PURPLE, WHHHHY?), and he's a mysterious type? To be honest, the man sounded like a creep. Although I cannot say much, because me and my family are creepy in a quirky and upbeat kind of way. Either he was a creep or leaning to the point of swinging that way.

"So, what are we supposed to do now?" Yumi quietly piped up, she didn't even seem to realize she was appearing pathetic by hugging herself and trembling. I felt sorry for my daughter, but with that creep on the other side of our RV I wanted to stand a distance to protect her. "That guy could be trouble just waiting to happen! And I-I'm a-a-a little uneasy about fighting...after all, that fight with Kankuro's puppet was enough to traumatize me for life."

We all rolled our eyes. All of us excluding my very traumatized daughter whom certainly should have been honing her skills and courage better. But, that's her own fault.

And then we all quietly slipped around the corner to get a good look at this creepy guy whom was tapping at our RV like that. He was still standing there and...wow...he was quite the extravagant character!

He was around my height – meaning he was slightly short for a man, had fair skin as if he didn't get enough sunlight, and sure enough he had DARK FREAKING PURPLE hair I hoped wasn't natural that was long enough to drape down his chest, and I noticed that he did wear cheap-looking studs in his ears. He was dressed extravagantly yet sharply in a gray long-sleeved shirt, DARK FREAKING PURPLE zipped jacket over that with the sleeves rolled up awkwardly, snazzy black pants that looked to be in a jean material, and wore what seemed to be brand new black boots.

All I want to know is what possessed one man to adorn so much of a DARK FREAKING PURPLE color! I can't stand that color...I can't stand it at all...oh dear God, I feel so faint every time I've subjected to have to gaze upon it's horror! That's why I always tell Yumi or _ to never buy clothes that are DARK FREAKING PURPLE. I have to put a lot of stress on DARK FREAKING PURPLE, by the way, for it's that terrible and evil.

"Evil jerk!" Yumi randomly yelled like a stupid person upon seeing the mystery man. She tore away from all of us and charged forward at the man. Not giving him much reaction time, she released her hair from it's braids to show she was serious and reached into the back of her shirt for the sword she hides there. "How dare you vandalize the RV of my friends! You are so dead!"

The mystery man didn't look threatened, but I can't blame him. Anyway, he merely held out the stick, apparently hoping to counter Yumi's sword with that. She leaped off one foot and flew at him, nearly chopping off locks of his DARK FREAKING PURPLE colored hair in the process when he ducked his head.

"I really think we should stop her." Gaara commented, briefly resting a hand against his forehead in obvious embarrassment. I looked over in his direction to see that Temari was doing the same thing, and even Inner G had fallen to the ground on his face.

Their weapons collided and it was the strangest thing I tell you. Yumi's sword didn't have a snowball's chance in hell because the DARK FREAKING PURPLE guy was able to counter it with ease. I swear, the guy was very over the top but he did manage to hold his own very good...it was almost a pleasure to watch with the exception of my disgust for DARK FREAKING PURPLE. Finally, Yumi made a stupid move by letting her sword retreat from the entanglement.

Easily, the man with DARK FREAKING PURPLE hair snitched her weapon right out of her hand and then shoved his stick into her rib area, causing her to yell and fall backwards onto the ground. I screamed, panicked and worried for my daughter although she managed to move slightly and attempt to get off her back.

My loving husband, Gaara, and Inner G walked over to where my daughter lie beaten by a simple stick of all things. She grunted and moaned, but the three still offered her assistance for getting back on her feet. As soon as _ and Inner G had her propped up by the shoulders, and Gaara had smacked her face to bring her out of a daze, the man with DARK FREAKING PURPLE hair performed some kind of twirl with the stick and then stuffed it back into the suitcase we all had yet to notice in his free hand.

"You're harsh!" Denise spontaneously declared, I was shocked to see her standing up for Yumi's sake. But then I remembered that she may look spineless, but I've yet to know the true Denise. Whom may actually have a spine after all. The (dyed) blue-haired mangaka's (natural) black brows knitted and her tone grew slightly deeper and serious. "Yumi was just trying to make a heroine out of herself even though she sucks at fighting ever since giving up that lifestyle! Maybe, because of my long-term memory loss, I forget a lot of things...but you can be assured I will remember this!"

"Er, Denise, that's enough." Temari stated, walking up to her friend's side and sending her a disapproving expression as she restrained her by encircling her arms around her shoulders. It looked more like a Girl's Love scene than anything. "You have to stop charging like that, you have to think of what you're going to say and do BEFORE you charge in like that. Everyone knows it, except a select few."

"Oh, I'm sorry...Temari..." Denise sounded close to tears. She turned her head and met Temari's eyes. "You aren't mad at me, are you?"

"Well..." Temari seemed to lightly squeeze her shoulders a little, and actually smiled gently. GENTLY, people. "We have to make exceptions for you, after all, the only reasons you're on this trip with us are because we're friends. And also because you publishing a future money could bring you fame and fortune – that you will share with US."

I couldn't help thinking that the moment between those two misleading girls should have been accompanied by soft harp music, sparkles, and flowers all around them. I know that Temari is pretty much bi, but would she and Denise make a relationship like that work?

After the girls let that moment go, I turned back to the DARK FREAKING PURPLE haired man whom was suddenly side by side with Kankuro. They both were grinning at them and looking kind of aroused by the display. Suddenly, I felt like I was surrounded by perverts. Even my daughter didn't have the cleanest mind, no matter how I tried to enforce pure things.

The Girl's Love moment passed by, and we all returned to the scene at hand. The one that actually mattered to the plot of this very crazy story. And, geez, I just received a powerful pain in my forehead for breaking the fourth wall. I don't understand why that has to happen, it's like karma or something.

"Hey, girl," The man with DARK FREAKING PURPLE hair suddenly chimed in. He turned his attention to Yumi struggling to stand with all three guys helping her up because they were embarrassed at her fail attack and wanted to leave the scene. "You know how to be stupid, I guess that's amusing. However, the worst mistake anyone can commit is charging without thinking." Naruto, in the background, suddenly wore a guilty expression and then scurried back into the RV. I couldn't help wondering if he had gotten called out for something. "I don't apologize for attacking you, but I hope you'll take this chance to improve yourself so that you will someday be able to stand up when no one else will help."

"Jerk." Yumi spat, shakily standing to her feet and glaring daggers at the man. I walked over to ask if she had any injuries or pains, but she just smacked my hand away and continued the odd staring contest with the DARK FREAKING PURLE-haired 'jerk'. "You think you're so cool with your oddly-colored hair and stick tricks, huh?"

"Firstly: my hair's dyed. Secondly: I have no 'tricks' with this stick although it is my weapon of choice when it has to be." The mysterious man coolly replied. He met her evil eyes, although he didn't seem hostile at all. As a matter of fact, he was as nonchalant as one could be in context. "You know you fail when you're beaten up by a piece of driftwood. I would think on that a little if I were you, girl."

Yumi stepped back, shocked by either the way he dissed her or the way he could be so nonchalant. Either way, her cheeks lit up red and she too fled to the not-so-much safety of the RV. I can't help but wonder what is it about this guy that points out people's flaws and makes them run away in humiliation.

"Hey, I think Yumi ran away. And where did Naruto go?" Gaara pointed out obviously. We all ignored him in that moment and then returned to gazing at the enigma which was the mysterious man when he cleared his throat.

"I suppose all of you people are traveling together, and though you don't get along well...you're attempting to make exceptions and learn a valuable lesson about family, friendship, the roller coaster ride of romance, the twisty road of choices, among other rather deep and meaningful descriptions?"

"The man's got an impressive way of words, you have to admit that." Kankuro mentioned in an admiring manner as he leaned slightly into Gaara's ear. His brother, silently agreeing to that, nodded.

"Judging by the way the girl attacked me out of the blue, I assume you all wonder why I chose to scrape your beaten down vehicle. Good news for you: I'll tell you everything willingly."

"Yeah, do it! I want to hear more words!" Kankuro called out. The DARK FREAKING PURPLE-haired guy simply stared blankly at him. Never once loosing his impressive composure. I can't help wondering what was so great about him, yes he used big words, but he was stupid-looking to me.

"Actually, Mr. purple-haired dude," Inner G chimed in like he tended to do. I turned full attention to him, knowing that he was about to say something that my daughter's boyfriend secretly thought. After all, this is his job as an inner. "I want to know how you get your hair so silky and long, and how much time it takes to dye it."

"Ah...everyone poses that question. My life consists of many interrogations, however, I don't dislike answering." The mystery wrapped inside an enigma met the gaze of Inner G and smiled very slightly as he rambled on to answer that useless question. "Firstly: I use many natural products and eat foods with positive reactions to the human body, you would NOT want to witness me accidentally forgetting to do those things and see my stringy, gross, shedding locks as per result. Secondly: my locks are naturally strawberry blond, therefore it takes a while to get the dye to really settle in and conceal the original plain Jane look. My hair dye would be the only thing I use on my locks that is man-made. I assume you're satisfied?"

Personally, seeing as though I find DARK FREAKING PURPLE a repulsive color, I would like to see the mystery wrapped inside of an enigma without his hair dye. He may look a thousand times better, and I could see him being chased after by possible love interests. Otherwise, he's a hopeless one.

"Now then, allow me to explain who I am and why I have vandalized your RV." The mystery wrapped inside of an enigma stated so coolly, I MUST find out how he does that. Honestly, that's somewhat admirable. Somewhat, but nothing big. "My name...is confidential for now. However, you may address me by surname until I decide to reveal the first: Hikari."

Immaturely, Inner G began snickering loudly. He then turned to Gaara, whom was just as stoic as usual, and nudged his shoulder before commenting... "That DOES make him sound like a pussy!"

Hikari promptly turned to look at the inner, eyes narrowing angrily. "I'll have you know: my grandfather whom was the first to have that surname in the family...he died honorably in a terrible and tragic act of heroism on the battlefield. So...screw you."

Inner G's snickers promptly faded and he hid behind Gaara, whom murmured an apology for both his brash thoughts that he voiced openly (because that's what inners supposedly do, they voice all of the thoughts you'd rather not) and also for the inner's immature snickering.

"Ahem, now then, allow me to continue." Hikari stated, as if forgetting about that brash comment he was dissed with. I couldn't help feeling ashamed to allow my daughter to hang with the inner self of her boyfriend, that could only be the source of her noteworthy vulgarity. "I come from West Village, which I guess by total chance is where you all are traveling to. And I express approval for that: because West Village has something for everyone and has a famous mall and even very tall penthouses that overlook the beautiful greenery and beaches nearby. The reason I am here, is because I have seen a lot of you back in North City...although it was from a distance when you were trying to scrounge up cash. And I'm traveling too, North City was my first stop and I do not regret it."

"That's so interesting." I commented honestly. I then grimaced and nudged my beloved husband's shoulder when I noticed he was falling asleep next to me from the story. We couldn't let Hikari know that his story was admittedly being boring for some of us.

"I can't fully explain my reasons, for it is too early. I would be breaking the fourth wall if said any more concerning that, so, you must understand this. However I will say this..." Everybody leaned forward curiously, for various reasons. Too many to list in this small paragraph. "I have prepared a most interesting journey before all of you in this group, even that weakling of a teenager whom attacked me, you all have no choice but to go along with the wishes of me."

I didn't know what he was babbling about. Really, the only thing I could register was that this man's hair was frightening and I wished to douse him within a waterfall hoping to rid that horrid color off his hair! Ew, it's so hideous!

Something unappealing must have been said, however, because Denise and Kankuro piped up in unison. That's not something that happens often, it must be a rare serious moment in that case. "Hey! What makes you think we're going to randomly drop our plans and join you on a sidequest?!"

For several seconds, the two didn't realize they had the same angered comment. Both the puppet master and not-yet mangaka paused everything and gazed at each other with surprised expressions, before dropping that matter and returning to glaring at the DARK FREAKING PURPLE-haired man before us.

Hikari just raised a hand to signal them to shut up. And then it buried into the pocket of his trousers casually. Denise still glaring non-threateningly and Kankuro screwing around with his cellphone now. "Take a chill pill and relax. I can explain why you must drop your plans BRIEFLY to screw around with my plans." Even when he used slang-like words and overused the word 'plans', you have to admit Hikari sounded too sophisticated, which annoyed everyone including I. "I have been watching you, you're perfect to respond to my plans and go on a quest. This quest's nature and role in the story will gradually be revealed as you play, but it won't come together until the very end; so you must stay in suspense until then. The whole quest is quite simple, and yet so complex: you all must work together, there is no such thing as 'only I can do this' or 'get your lazy butt out of my way and allow me to do the work and take all credit', no, you cannot lower yourselves to such standards."

Blah, blah, blah, blah, Hikari went on to tell us things that are too boring and long to describe. And good God, it gives me a headache of epic proportions to try and mention it all. He gave in depth details to this random quest that me, my family, and our new-found friends have no choice but to go on. Because if we don't: he THREATENED to steal our RV and never return it, leaving all of us here in this world without transportation, none of our material possessions, and no money at all (excluding that Yen Kankuro insisted upon bringing, and all of that Euro Gaara's inner somehow has). It's not that I'm trying to establish a non-good moral or anything, but, WE CAN'T LIVE without our STUFF!

Even Gaara nearly passed out when he was threatened of being robbed of stuff. Wait, that sounds...vulgar outside of the context...oh my...

Anyway, let me give a brief, and it's not really all that brief, description of the quest we're embarking on. I'll attempt to be brief about it, but you'll more than likely be bored to tears because much like my daughter...I'm a terrible narrator. That's why I don't know why I was chosen to narrate this chapter.

So the quest goes like this: Hikari will be watching us from 'afar' for two entire weeks, which will be the amount of time all of us in the group have to combine our strength and brains to solve the obstacles in our path for more information and 'self-discovery' like stuff. If we can solve everything in a shorter time frame, he said he would halt everything that instant and then 'reward us greatly'. Whatever that means, I honestly have no idea although I am curious.

He stated there are 'many winding paths' we could take if we didn't put up with each others' faults, combine strength and brains, and accept other opinions and help when it was needed. The most narrow and correct would be shown through...'correct attitudes and actions'. Yes, he did pause like that when explaining, I assume it was to take a breather. Anyway, he then continued by saying that there were clues already lain out before us and it was our own faults if we didn't notice them before the two week period was up. We were specifically told not to go too far away from the spot we were currently in, because he would then 'find us easily and steal everything that you own'. And that was spooky. He then gave us a piece of paper detailing in cheesy rhyme, which was the first clue, all of the clues weren't written in that pattern on pieces of blank and red-lined notebook paper. But they were located in crazy locations, and it was up to us to retrieve them.

And then Hikari waved us off and ran away, I have to admit he was a fast one. That must be one of his strong points, I knew that eating a balanced diet payed off! Now, to tell that to Kankuro...

**.**

**AND, A FEW MOMENTS LATER, INSIDE OF THE RV**

Now, after a few minute timeskip, all of us gathered inside of the RV not knowing what to make of all of this. Tick, tock, tick, tock, there went the time of our two week period and we still hadn't found any of the other clues excluding the first one that was handed out to us for a start.

I leaned over the shoulder of Gaara, just as everyone else excluding my daughter. And we all read off the clue inside of our minds. At least, I ASSUMED everyone else did it inside their minds. I'm not a mind reader and I don't claim to be.

"_The first clue you do need to seek_

_It's not speed-required, nor is it needed in strength_

_The length of time, it's not very long-distance_

_But why are you not moving this instance?_

_Surrounded by excess padding,_

_Located close to the heart,_

_This is the start, of your quest_"

- That's what it said in shockingly-terrible handwriting on the paper. It was very terrible, both the rhyming and the hand-writing just do you know. I was puzzled, both by the clue's whereabouts and why Hikari could be so sophisticated and yet have the worst hand-writing I have EVER seen.

"This doesn't make any sense!" I randomly shouted in distress. Everyone leaned back upright and I began pacing around frantically. Yes, that was kind of embarrassing, but I was worried. "Oh, we'll NEVER be able to crack this case! We won't be able to save our material items!"

Briefly, Naruto had a disgusted look on his face when I gazed at him halting my pacing. He then approached me grimacing. "So, Mrs. Haruna, the material items...that's all you care about?"

"Is there anything of more importance in the world?" Denise countered, from the kitchen where she was furiously scanning the cabinets in vain for whereabouts of our next clue.

Naruto, although on good terms with her, briefly looked away from me and sent the aspiring mangaka with long-term memory loss another heated _glare_. I couldn't help wondering what angered him, but it would have to be elaborated on later.

We all sighed together, attempting to figure out where this clue could possibly be. Yet another minute had passed, and that first clue what little to no help...it seemed we would lose by the end of two weeks and be WALKING to West Village on foot with no items, money, and only the clothes on our backs.

All hope seemed to be lost, and then, Gaara suddenly sat up alertly. He stood and then proclaimed, "I have a theory as to where the clue could be. And it seems obvious, I'm surprised you haven't figured it out yet."

Denise promptly slammed the lower cabinets and closed and dashed over, smiling like a moron and clasping her hands together.

And Inner G piped up, having to because that was his job as Gaara's inner. "I know it too, man! And I am not going to waste time and let that freaky and yet sophisticated guy run all over us!" He promptly turned to Denise, whom he was closer to, and the hint of an impish smile formed on his lips. I had a bad feeling... "And the clue happens to be, right here...!"

We all sweatdropped as if inside a manga. Because Inner G promptly, despite Denise's shocked gasp and freaked protests...shoved a hand down her shirt.

"That wasn't...what I expected." Temari commented awkwardly, a disgusted look appeared on her face and she looked across the room at Gaara. Gaara, might I mention, he was too freaked out. "Did you seriously suggest Denise's chest as the whereabouts of the clue, Gaara?"

"Actually, it was obvious the first clue mentioned 'excess padding' and was 'close to the heart'. If you put your mind in the gutter long enough, it makes sense." Gaara explained casually, not looking the slightest amount embarrassed at all. He was able to hold much composure as explained farther for us stupid people, "Although I didn't consider Denise being the one to invade...because she's not exactly the most-endowed girl we know. In fact, I was shocked to realize she had anything at all."

"Well...I admit I was shocked too, when she wore that skimpy camisole in the kitchen of Han, Holly, and Andries." Temari admitted, looking scandalized over the whole affair. Probably because she secretly found Denise to be kind of attractive sometimes. Sort of. Kind of?

Inner G continued to feel around for the next piece of paper. His expression turned from excited to disappointed, and he finally gave up and removed his hand, drawing a huge sigh. Denise, meanwhile, her face was like bright red and she could only throw herself over to the couch protectively holding an arm against her chest. Poor girl.

"Well...I'm guessing the clue wasn't there?" Naruto suggested, he looked absolutely crestfallen. "What made you think that Hikari could have been talking about DENISE of all people? Her lack of chest is severely disappointing."

"Is that ALL you people can focus on right now?!" Denise asked, voice trembling just like the rest of her body.

Inner G sadly turned and retreated to my side, briefly glancing at my chest area. He briefly smiled hopefully, and that was when I gave him an evil look and attempted to make him back off my reaching into the sheath on my back for my special sword. If there's one thing I can count on, despite living as a disgraced ninja in the Modern World, it's my knowledge of kenjutsu!

"Okay, guys," Kankuro piped up excitedly grinning. "We haven't much time, so let's just line up all of the chicks and one by one-"

Promptly, Temari appeared by his side and gave him an angry scowl that caused her brother to back down. "OR, we could check ourselves. Please don't give Gaara's annoying inner any more perverted ideas..."

"Don't be so hasty, it's not like I was thinking about feeling YOU up for the clue."

"Hey, are you implying I WOULDN'T be a reasonable target for the clue to be hidden inside of?"

"No offense, but you should just keep your clothes on for the sake of the sanity of EVERYONE."

"That goes freaking double for you, you're exactly impressive down there, if you know what I mean!"

I couldn't take it anymore. That entire exchange was disgusting and not getting us anywhere, and I know they're siblings and it wouldn't exactly be uncommon for them to have seen each other in the nude in the past...BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I kind of didn't want to hear this!

"PEOPLE!" I hysterically yelled, effectively gaining the attention of everyone because they thought I lost my mind. When push comes to shove, I can get loud and bloodthirsty...but that's in a super one-in-a-lifetime moment. "As much as I would love to hear these hallmark, 'awwww'-inducing exchanges, I believe we should be returning to finding those clues so we don't lose our STUFF!"

Again, Inner G was set off. He nodded vigorously at my words and then stepped up. "I agree with meh man's freaky girl's mom! For once! Listen, alleged master of puppets, 'ya can't stand there and stupidly say that she's not smokin' hot!"

Everyone turned to gaze at him, Gaara included. We awaited him to go off on another one of his lovesick lectures only to have Temari yell at him for destroying that border line between them. But strangely, this time Temari didn't seem ready to yell at him about that, she actually seemed fascinated to hear him...for just ONE time at least.

The inner gazed at us, promptly tensing when he realized how much attention his outburst received. Suddenly crumpling a little, nervously wringing his hands and keeping his eyes on the floor, he weakly carried on... "Because...'ya know...she's actually the prettiest out of everyone in this group. One look was all it took for me to crave her like a freaking drug, so doesn't that mean something?" I leaned slightly and noticed his cheeks turn bright red, rivaling the color of his hair. The inner promptly turned and dashed away into Gaara's room for some random reason.

"...Wow, everybody's been embarrassing themselves to death today." Gaara commented briefly, eyes widened slightly as he realized that his inner just ran rather fast. I think that's why he seemed stunned. But only he knows, I guess. And I think Inner G must have given him a comeback in his head, because he once again rolled his eyes and then dropped the topic.

"Well, anyone know who's chest we're going to grope next?" My husband spoke up, I could have sworn he gazed at me, wearing the exact same sexy smirk he wore on our wedding night before...ahem. Well, I received some rather pleasant memories, did I not?

"Yes, I know. I've given it some thought while I was trying to rid my head of the inner's embarrassed comments." Gaara readily answered. For a moment, I swear his cheeks pinked. But he continued on strongly, not seeming the slightest amount not composed. "Well...Yumi sounds like a reasonable whereabouts of the second clue. She does kind of...have noticeable development compared to Denise." In the background, a still traumatized Denise stopped shivering long enough to apparently curse at him in Korean and then return to holding herself and mumbling mantra to try and calm down.

My husband was tensely silent for several seconds. For a moment, he cleared his throat and his eyes seemed to be more colder than usual as he gazed at Gaara. "Gaara...are you implying you take that kind of notice to my one and only daughter?"

"It depends on the situation. Honestly, Mr. Haruna, that wasn't the first thing I noticed when we first met at that gas station."

"Oh. Whew. So...what did you notice about my ONE and ONLY daughter?"

"Why are you putting so much emphasis on it? Well, ah, I guess the first thing I noticed was that she looked like a grown up version of a girl I encountered when I was kid, and of course it turned out to be her. More specifically, I guess I noticed the way her smile looked so childishly wide and bright."

"Mmmm...okay, you got me there. I apologize for briefly wanting to put you in a choke hold."

"SWEETIE. . .!" I shouted, appalled, my husband's revelation of wanting to go that far was very shocking but also humiliating.

I certainly wish I could go on longer and narrate. But alas, my time in the limelight has come to an end and I don't know if I will get to do this again. So, with that said, I only wish I could have had some sort of understanding of what kind of chaos would happen with this "sidequest" we've gotten wrapped inside of, not to mention the fact we are attempting to make some progress in our travels to West Village.

Oh my, the excitement just never seems to end...but...that is surprisingly okay. Maybe it's stressful occasionally, offers plenty of humiliation and vulgarity that I'm no longer accustomed to, and yes...I could live without common sense being ignored. I honestly feel like I'm connecting so much more with my sweet husband and eccentric daughter, and these crazy teens and older teens – and whatever Inner G is – actually make good companions by the end of the day. I know this may sound cheesy, alas I can't help saying it, this trip's kind of worth the negative moments. In the end, we are all like one giant family...or something of the effect...oh...my stomach is rumbling and I can't be poetic when I'm hungry...

**.**

**To Be Continued In Chapter 49, To Hopefully Make More Sense There...don't miss it!**

**.**

**Oh my God, it's been such a long time since me and StormofyourDestiny have gotten the chance to write stuff. I'm speaking for the both of us when I say: I AM SO SORRY. TT_TT Yes, let me briefly explain what the holdup has been. Well, we both agreed that the writing back to back was becoming slightly stressful and her mind was experiencing a terrible case of writer's block too. Plus, these last few months have been very eventful.**

**My twenty-first birthday, my anime marathons, my work, my catching up with friends, Thanksgiving, Christmas, my wedding, New Year's celebrations...gah...we're not dead. It's just been full of events that stopped the writing flow. TT_TT But hey, that's all over! *Wipes tears away* ;D Because MY top New Year's Resolution is: "Spend more spare time writing fanfics"! My hands are trembling with anticipation, my heart is pounding, my face is wearing a big grin, and I am so ready to write! I wanted to kick this off "write" - LOL, lame pun attempt – by finishing up the chapter for this story! I hope you enjoyed it! Please read and review, it would mean a lot to me~!**

**-MidnightSakuraBlossom, your totally pumped up authoress**


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